Irken Idol
by CookieLuvahhXD
Summary: When there is Irken Idol, Zim joins to try and win that death machine so he can destroy all mankind. Will Dib stop him from winning it? Will they sing good enough to even make the finals? WHO WILL WIN IRKEN IDOL? Rated T for sexual humor, censored swearin
1. The Death Machine

**Irken Idol  
Chapter 1: ****The USMAPYSDKDM??**

Setting: Dib's House

_Dib's father, Membrane, saw that their house was gone and then he used his Insta-Construct to rebuild his house with everybody's things in it. Everybody went inside their house and did their usual thing. Dib went on TV to watch Mysterious Mysteries, Gaz went on her Game Slave 2, and before Membrane went down to his lab, he went walking around his house to see if everything was there. For some reason, he didn't question why his house had been gone._

**Tv. **Today, we're going to talk about a baby Bigfoot, sent in by Dib.

**Dib. **Yes!! Finally! They're gonna show mine! I've been waiting for this for years! (shows his happy face with his tongue sticking out)

**Membrane. **(walking by) Dib! Is the TV teaching you to stick your tongue out to people? You shouldn't watch that kind of stuff! You should watch..REAL SCIENCE! (pulls out a VHS tape)

**Dib.** What?! NO! They're gonna show something that I've been waiting for years! (straps come out of couch and straps Dib to the couch real tight) Hey! What is this?!

**Membrane. **Now watch.. and learn! (puts tape in the VHS)

**Dib. **NOOO!!

_The television starts showing the tape. The theme song comes on._

Theme Song Plays  
_Song: Bill Nye the Science Guy, from Bill Nye the Science Guy Show  
_**Bill Nye, the Science Guy  
Bill Nye, the Science Guy  
Bill, Bill, Bill, Bill, Bill, Bill  
Bill Nye, the Science Guy  
"Science rules"  
Bill Nye, the Science Guy  
"Inertia is a property of matter"  
Bill, Bill, Bill, Bill, Bill, Bill  
Bill Nye, the Science Guy  
Bill, Bill, Bill, Bill, Bill, Bill, Bill, Bill, Bill, Bill  
"T-minus seven seconds"  
Bill Nye, the Science Guy.**

Theme Song Ends.

_The episode of Bill Nye, the Science Guy is about fossils._

**Tv. **Why do people thing there are such things as big foot?

**Dib. **Because they see big footprints!!

**Tv. **You see this big footprints? They are really tracks from fossils of very old dinosaurs.

**Dib. **No!! They're really from big foot! BIG FOOT!

_The tv goes on and on about whatever Bill is trying to talk about. When it ended, you see the straps that covered Dib disappear and Dib, who is now sleeping, fell on the floor from the couch. Then Gaz passes by, sees Dib on the floor, and kicked his big head. Then Dib woke up._

**Dib. **Is it over? (goes to TV and changes the channel to Mysterious Mysteries)

**Tv. **Sorry, Mysterious Mysteries is having technical difficulties.

**Dib. **Grr.. What else is on? (changes the channel)

_You see a dude swimming in water with strange looking fish._

**Tv. **(in Australian accent) I'm swimming with a beautiful school of foogoo fish. I'm gonna slap this foogoo fish just to see what happens! (dude slaps a fish) GORGEOUS!

**Dib. **uhh... (changes the channel) Ooh! It's Jessie McCartney!

_You see the television is on MTV. You see Jessie McCartney singing her song._

**Dib. **WOOT! I love Jessie McCartney! She's an awesome singer.

_Gaz walks by eating a hamburger and sits next to Dib._

**Gaz. **This hamburger actually tastes good.

**Dib. **(looks at what Gaz is eating) Gaz, where'd you get that?

**Gaz. **I saw it on the table. I was hungry.

**Dib. **You do know that is Zim's hamburger.. right??

**Gaz. **(looks at the Irken symbol on the hamburger) AH! GROSS! Now I have Zim's DNA in my mouth. This taste is gonna stay in my mouth forever!! (leaves the hamburger on the couch and walks off)

**Dib. **mhm.. I wonder.. (takes a piece of the hamburger and eats it) wow.. I didn't know Irken food actually tasted good. If our food burns him, then I wonder what their food does to us..(watch beeps) It's time to go stalk Zim!

Setting: Zim's House

_You see Dib crawling on the ceiling in the living room. Gir is watching MTV too and cheers! _

**Gir. **Woot! GO JESSIE MCCARTNEY!

**Dib. **(falls off the ceiling) Why is there make-up on you??

**Gir. **I want to look like Jessie McCartney! (pulls out a wig) Oh yeah! Go Jessie!

**Dib. **(forgets about stalking Zim and cheers too) OH YEAH! JESSIE!

_Dib and Gir start dancing. You see Zim coming up from that toilet again and sees Dib and Gir dancing! By the way, Dib dances really good! _

**Zim. **Dib! What are you doing? Why are you dancing?! Is that Jessie McCartney?

**Dib. **Yeah.. How'd you know?

**Zim. **She's famous all over the universe! She acted in movies such as Toy Story as Barbie and sang songs in a bunch of different languages! She became famous all over the universe in just two months! She's one of those universal artists. She's the only one thats from Earth.

**Dib. **So, she's a famous human being that knows about all other aliens and stuff?!

**Zim. **Yeah...

_Zim changes the channel to channel 122, TIC (The Irken Channel). A commercial is on._

**Tv. **Do you want to be famous? Do you want to show the universe what you're made of? Sing here at Irken Idol! It's a special season because it is the 9,876,543,210th anniversary! Anybody from any universe of any dimension can come! The prize is a century's supply of tacos, burritos, and anything else you can think of!

**Gir. **.. Tacos??

**Tv. **Also, you win an ultra super mega awesome pretty yet super dangerous killer death machine, or "USMAPYSDKDM." Did I mention it's shiny?? And it never gets scratched so you'll never have to make sure it's polished and clean and covered in scratches!

**Zim. **The USMAPYSDKDM??

**Tv. **You also get one free wish from our advanced Irken genie! It doesn't matter what it is! Want a free trip to Paradisia? Want an invention that was never built before? Do you want to expose an alien for who he is?!

**Dib. **YES!! YEESSSS!!

**Tv. ** No problem! Call for auditions today! 1-555-555-Irken-Idol. Call now! It is 1-555-555-Irken-Idol!

_The TV then shows phone numbers in different languages such as Vortian, Utopian, Irken, English, Filipino, Spanish, French, Schmorange, etc._

**Zim. **A death machine?! Oh my gosh!

**Dib.** Zim, can you even sing?

**Zim. **Dib? What are you still doing here? OUT! (pushes Dib out the door)

**Gir.** A century's supply of tacos?? (SCREAMS) TACOS! TAACOOOOSSS!! (runs to the kitchen to do who knows what)

_Zim goes to his phone and dials the pretty numbers._

**Phone. **Hello this is Irken Idol how may I help you?

**Zim. **I would like to join Irken Idol.

**Phone. **Can you sing?

**Zim. ** Yes.

**Phone. **Okay here are the rules.  
1.) Since this is a special anniversary, you'll need some type of SIR unit or robot that can sing.  
2.) Your robot should be the lead singer.  
Do you have a robot that can sing?

**Zim. **So you're saying that I should have my SIR unit / robot to be my lead singer?

**Phone. **That's right.

**Zim. **GIR!

**Gir. **(comes in covered with pickles and waffles) YES MY LORD!

**Zim.** Why are you covered in pickles and waffles?

**Gir. **Waffle pickles blew up on me like this KABLAM!

**Zim. **Can you sing?

**Gir. **Yeah!

**Zim. **(to phone) Yeah, he can sing.

**Phone. ** Okay come to Planet Irk on the third day of the full moon.

**Zim. **Uhh.. which moon?

**Phone. **Irk's moon! BYE! (hangs up on Zim)

**Zim. **(looks at his calender for the Irkens) The third day of the full moon is.. in three days! It'll take me about six months to get there!

**Computer. **According to my map, it says that when you were coming here to Earth, you went through a time warp that made it seem like a trip as long as 6 months. It really only takes 1 day or 24 hours to get there.

**Zim. **MUAHAHAHAHAHAHAAAAA!! and .. HAH! Once you and I will win, Gir, we'll rule the world!

**Gir.** Look Master! TRY SOME OF ME WAFFLE PICKLES! THEY'RE DELICIOUS!

_Zim eats a waffle pickle._

**Zim. **Oh my gosh! This pickle.. is IRKEN!

**Dib. **(who was secretly on the ceiling) Oh no! I'm not letting Zim get that death machine! (falls on the floor)

**Zim. **Dib! YOU STALKER!

**Dib. **ZIM! Just because it's green doesn't mean pickles have to be Irken! .. Do they??

**Zim. **So Dib-monkey what are you going to do now?

**Dib. **I'm gonna stop you from getting that USMAPYSDKDM!! I'm gonna make a robot and..

**Zim. **and what?? It's not like you can sing better than me! Us Irkens have one of the best voices in the universe! and it'll be a miracle if you could sing better than me. How do you think Gir sings so very good?!

**Zim. **Gir, will you please stop singing?? So as I was saying.. It'll be a miracle if you could sing better than us. But I don't dance!

**Dib. **You don't think dancing takes some game??

**Zim. **You SING at Irken Idol! Think you can beat me with your dancing?!

**Dib. **A little...

Song Starts Playing  
_Song Tune: I Don't Dance, from High School Musical 2  
_**Dib.** (sings) Hey Zim you will never get that death machine!  
**Zim.** (sings) I've got to just do my thing.  
**Dib. **(starts dancing) Hey Zim you know I can sing better than you!  
I'll show you that it's one and the same:  
Singing, dancing, same game.  
It's easy: Show me your moves, start dancing!

**Zim.** I wanna sing you now, and that's all.  
This is what I do.  
It ain't no dance that you can show me.**  
Gir. **(sings) You'll never know it you never try.  
**Zim. **There's just one little thing that stops me every time yeah!  
**Dib. **Come on!

**Zim.** I don't dance

**Dib and Gir. **I know you can.  
**Zim.** Not a chance.  
**Dib and Gir. **If I could do this, well, you could do that.  
**Zim. **But I don't dance.  
**Dib. **Try dance me if you can!  
**Zim. **I don't dance.  
**Dib. **I say you can.

**Zim.** There's not a chance.  
**Dib. **You know I can beat you so give up now  
**Zim.** I don't dance, no.

**Dib. **Hey Zim you will never get that death machine!

**Zim. **I've got to just do my thing.

**Dib. **Hey Zim you know I can sing better than you!  
Two steppin', now you're up to dance  
I know you can do your dance  
It's easy: Just move your left arm and leg  
**Zim.** I've got what it takes, singing my songs,  
so you are going down you Dib-monkey OH YEAH!  
I'll show you how I do  
**Gir. **You'll never know if you never try  
**Zim. **There's just one little thing that stops me every time YEAH!  
**Dib. **Come on!

**Zim.** I don't dance

**Dib and Gir. **I know you can.  
**Zim.** Not a chance.  
**Dib and Gir. **If I could do this, well, you could do that.  
**Zim. **But I don't dance.  
**Dib. **Try dance me if you can!  
**Zim. **I don't dance.  
**Dib. **I say you can.

**Zim.** There's not a chance.  
**Dib. **You know I can beat you so give up now  
**Zim.** I don't dance, no.  
**Dib. **Lean back, tuck it in, take a chance.  
Move it out, spin around, do the dance  
**Zim. **I wanna sing you, not dance you  
I'll get that death machine and you won't beat me!  
**Dib. **I can prove it to you til you know it's true  
cause I can swing it  
I can bring it to the Broadway too.  
**Zim. **HAH! I'll show you what I got, you Dib-stink! YEAH!  
_Dib and Zim have a little dance off although Zim says I don't dance._  
**Dib. ** That's what I mean; That's how you move!

**Zim. ** Oh you sing horrible so give up now  
**Dib. ** I say you can.  
**Zim. **I know I can't  
**Dib and Zim. **I DON'T DANCE!  
_Zim and Dib start dancing again.  
_**Dib. **You can do it.  
**Zim. **I don't dance no.  
_Zim and Dib are still dancing.. Gir is just staying there.. watching in amusement.  
_**Dib. **Nothin' to it. alien scum, alien scum.  
**Zim. **I'll win that death machine with Gir so give up!  
**Dib. **One, two, three, four, everybody dance! Come on!  
_Gir starts dancing!  
_**Dib. **Come on!

**Zim.** I don't dance

**Dib and Gir. **I know you can.  
**Zim.** Not a chance.  
**Dib and Gir. **If I could do this, well, you could do that.  
**Zim. **But I don't dance.  
**Dib. **Try dance me if you can!  
**Zim. **I don't dance.  
**Dib. **I say you can.

**Zim.** There's not a chance.  
**Dib. **You know I can beat you so give up now  
**Zim.** I don't dance, no.  
**Dib. **Try dance me if you can!

**Zim.** I don't dance

**Dib and Gir. **I know you can.  
**Zim.** Not a chance.  
**Dib and Gir. **If I could do this, well, you could do that.  
**Zim. **But I don't dance.  
**Dib. **Try dance me if you can!  
**Zim. **I don't dance.  
**Dib. **I say you can.

**Zim.** There's not a chance.  
**Dib. **You know I can beat you so give up now  
**Zim.** I don't dance, no.  
Song ends.

**Dib. **I'll make my own robot! and sing! and DANCE! hah!  
**Zim. **How'd you know we needed our own robot?

**Dib. **You said that out loud when you were talking on that phone.  
**Zim. **uhh... COMPUTER!

**Computer. **I'm on it..

_A robotic arm comes out of the ceiling, grabs Dib, and throws him on the lawn. The gnomes see Dib, they fire a bunch of death rays at him, then they take him, then they throw him out of Zim's property. _

**Computer. **Dib actually sings as good as you.

**Zim. **YOU'RE MAKING IT UP! I have to get there in three days. How's my Voot Cruiser??

**Computer. **Repairing process for Voot Cruiser: 23 percent complete

**Zim. **Is it that hard to fix a little ship?! Computer! I'm mad! Get me soda!

**Computer. **Okay.. cranky...

**Zim. **What?!

**Computer. **Nothing. (gives Zim his soda)

**Zim. **Great.. now let's go see if this pickle is Irken.

**Chapter 1 ENDS!**

**HAH! I don't dance! from HIGH SCHOOL MUSICAL !! lol DISCLAIMERS: I totally don't own Invader Zim. The jhonen dude owns this amazing show. Otherwise, if I owned it, I'd still be making episodes. Bill Nye the Science Guy is owned by some other company.. I think Disney owns it. I didn't really see the episode with fossils though. I wonder how Irken burgers taste like! and Jessie McCartney is a parallel version of Jesse McCartney!! So, I kind of own Jessie McCartney! I don't own Toy Story! Disney does! TIC (the Irken channel) is a parody of TFC (the Filipino channel). I don't own MTV! and the dude with the Australian accent is a parody of somebody too. Foogoo fish was from Charlie the Unicorn 2 ! Ok the song that Zim and Dib sings at each other is called I Don't Dance which is a parody of I don't dance from High school musical 2 since I changed the lyrics a little. In the song, Dib was Ryan and Zim was Chad lol. Channel 122 is really Nicktoons Network. HOOHAA! Got questions?? MESSAGE/REVIEW ME! Want to review me?? well here's something..**

**REVIEW ME!  
NOW! FOR EVERYTIME YOU DON'T REVIEW ME, I WILL..THROW A MUFFIN AT YOU IN YOUR SLEEP! NOT JUST ANY MUFFIN! A DEATH MUFFIN!  
(dramatic music plays)**


	2. Bob

**OK PEOPLES! This is the second chapter! Ok I forgot to say this in the first chapter so I'll just say it now. Irken Idol is a sequel to Hurricane Zim, so READ THAT FIRST! Other than that, here's the next chapter :D**

* * *

**IRKEN IDOL!!  
Chapter 2: BOB!**

Setting: Skool  
_It's the next day and everybody in class was talking about Irken Idol. Zim is just sitting there staring off into space or something.  
Dib walks in and hears what the people are saying._

**Zita. **I would join it, but I don't sing good.

**Aki. **Yeah, me neither.

**Keef. **I wish I could sing. I know that Dib can sing good. He can sing real good..

**Zita. **Where did you come from? We don't even talk to each other, and Dib can sing?? No way..

**Dib. **Yes, I can! I'm joining Irken Idol!

**Zita. **Irken Idol?? You can't sing! We never even heard you sing!

**Aki. **Yeah, you're just annoying! You're so irken..

**Zita. **Huh..?

**Keef. **Don't you get it? Irken means annoying.

**Chunk. **Annoying? Hey! Dib is annoying!

_Whole class agrees._

**Dib. **What?! I'm not Irken! ZIM IS! And he's joining too!

_Zim snaps out of whatever he was dreaming of._

**Zim. **What were we talking about?

**Zita. **Irken Idol. Are you joining??

**Zim. **Uhh...uuuuhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh... no?

**Dib. **What?! NO?! Yeah you are! You even told me aliens.. or shall I say.. IRKENS.. like you could sing good!

**Letter M. **You always talkin about how Zim an alien and irken and stuff DUDE! Don't tease him like that. It's just a skin condition. You messed up.

**Dib. **He is an alien!! He does sing good!! And he's only doing it for the death machine to erase all mankind!

**Chunk. **He says mankind a lot.

**Zita. **_(to Zim) _You can sing good?? Cool, so are you going to try out for Irken Idol??

**Zim. **Sure...I guess.. But I'M NOT DOING IT TO WIN ANYTHING LIKE THAT USMAPYSDKDM (A/N: I memorized the letters!) !!...I'm only doing it for fun.

**Aki. **See, Dib, at least he doesn't "brag" about his musical talent.

**Dib. **I say I sing good and you call me annoying. He says he sings good and you say its cool. Hah! You should see me sing.. I sing a lot better than him..!!

**Zita. **Yeah well I bet I sing a lot better than YOU!

**Dib. **But you just said you don't sing good!

**Zita. **Exactly!

**Dib. **Just watch me!

_Dib starts to sing a song, but then he starts singing bad and he doesn't know why.__  
Then he sees it's Zim pointing some kind of weird thing at Dib's throat.  
It's the thing that changes your voice..  
__Class goes "BOO" and throws paper at him.  
Ms. Bitters comes out from a shadow in a corner of the ceiling._

**Bitters. **Who threw paper at Dib??

_Whole class raises their hand. _

**Bitters. **GOOD! My ears were starting to burn, and that only happens in the Sun. You all get A's for the whole semester!!

* * *

Setting: In the Streets  
_You hear the bell ring as skool ends. You see children climbing out windows and breaking through walls to get out of school, and children running out of the doors like there's no tomorrow. Zim start walking down the steps and you see Dib walking behind him. _

**Dib. **Everybody may have believed your stupid little act, but I'll prove it to them that you're only doing it for the USMAPYSDKDM to take over Earth and that you're an alien.

**Zim. **No one will believe you. Sure, they're gonna see that I'm alien on Irken Idol, but so what?! Right before they get their military forces ready, I'll destroy the world with the death machine, and there's nothing you can do about it.

**Dib. **Oh just watch Zim. I'm gonna build a robot and I'm gonna beat you at singing, cuz you know what?! I'm gonna blow you off the stage, and you can bet on it.

**Zim. **Oh we'll just see about that..

_Dib and Zim walk away. Then they walk back._

**Dib. **My house is this way.

**Zim. **My house is that way.

_We see Zim walking to his house and Dib walking to his house.  
We start to focus more on Dib. _

Music Starts Playing  
**Dib. **(walking and singing) Everybody's always talkin' at me  
Everybody's tryin' to get in my head  
I wanna listen to my own heart talkin'  
I need to count on myself instead

(Did you ever) Lose yourself to get what you want  
(Did you ever) Get on a ride then wanna get off  
(Did you ever) Push away the ones you should've held close  
Did you ever let go  
Did you ever not know

I'm not gonna stop that's who I am  
I'll give it all I got, that is my plan  
Will I find what I lost? You know you can  
Bet on it, bet on it, bet on it, bet on it

I wanna make it right, that is the way  
To turn my life around, today is the day  
Am I the type of guy who means what I say?  
Bet on it, bet on it, bet on it, bet on it

_Then we start to focus more on Zim while he is walking home..  
_**Zim. **(walking and singing too) How will I know if there's a path worth taking?  
Should I question every move I make?  
With all I've lost, my heart is breaking  
I don't wanna make the same mistake

(Did you ever) Doubt your dream will ever come true?

(Did you ever) Blame the world and never blame you?  
(I will never) Try to live a lie again  
I don't wanna win this game if I can't play it my way

I'm not gonna stop, that's who I am  
I'll give it all I got, that is my plan  
Will I find what lost ? You know you can  
Bet on it, bet on it, bet on it, bet on it

I wanna make it right, that is the way  
To turn my life around  
Today is the day!!

_Now we look at Dib  
_**Dib. **Am I the type of guy who means what I say?  
Bet on it, bet on it, bet on it, bet on it

_Dib was singing the whole time and he didn't know where he was walking.  
He stopped walking and he looked around to see he ended up in the mini golf course._

**Dib. **Hold up, give me room to think  
Bring it on down

_Dib steals a golf club from a dude and starts doing stuff with it._

**Dib. **Gotta work on my swing  
Gotta do my own thing, hold up!

_Dib then runs, still holding the golf club, to a lake and stares at his own reflection._

**Dib. **It's no good at all to see yourself  
And not recognize your face  
Out on my own, it's such a scary place  
The answers are all inside of me  
All I gotta do is believe...  
Song STOPS..

_Then you see Rob walking towards Dib. For you people who don't know, Rob is the dude that gave Dib like four wedgies in Room With a Moose._

**Rob. **HEY DIB! You stole my golf club.  
**Dib. **Your golf club??

_Dib then gets a flash back of him singing while stealing a golf club from a dude.  
He looks at his own hand to see he is still holding it._

**Dib. **Oh!! You mean.. this golf club?!

**Rob. **YEAH! That golf club!!

_Rob takes it away from Dib. _

**Dib. **Wow, I didn't know you play mini golf.

**Rob. **No, I don't! You never saw me here, OKAY?! Tell this to anybody at school and I'll give you the Texas Wedgie!!

**Dib. **No! Not the.. TEXAS WEDGIE!

**Rob. **Oh yes.. THE TEXAS WEDGIE!

_Zim comes out of nowhere.._

**Zim. **HAHA!! Not only does the filthy Dib-stink sing bad, he's got a big head too!! MUAHAHAHAHA!! Man, I'm evil..

**Rob. **Freak..

_Rob smacks Zim on the head._

**Rob. **HAHA! HAHAHAHAHA!! HAHAHAHAHA!! I SAID FREAK!! GET IT?! HAHAHA!!

_Rob starts laughing so hard he couldn't see anything.  
Dib obviously sees nothing funny in it, except for the fact that Rob smacked Zim.  
Then Dib saw that Zim's wig and contacts fell out. He looked up to see if Rob was looking, but he was still laughing.._

**Dib. **Look EVERYBODY! ZIM'S AN ALIEN!

_Nobody was looking at them and Rob was still laughing his butt off.  
After he was done laughing, Zim put his disguise back on before anybody could see anything. _

**Dib. **Let me guess.. nobody saw that.. right??

**Rob. **You, stop talkin' to yourself, and you _(points to Zim) _you're so ugly and so short... I don't want to see your face ever again, got it?! haha ugly.

_The words "SHORT" echoed in Zim's head.._

**Zim. **What did you say to me?!

**Rob. **That you're ugly...?

**Zim. **No, after that...

**Rob. **I don't wanna see your face ever again??

**Zim. **No!! BETWEEN THAT.

**Rob. **uhh short?

**Zim. **AAAHH!!

_Zim attacks Rob. The police people came and dragged Zim off. _

**Police people. **Hey! You shouldn't attack people! That is not very nice!! You don't belong here!

_Zim gets dragged off outside.  
He just walks home again.._

**Dib. **Wow, I never knew Zim could be sensitive about his height.. _(A/N: Me too, Dib, me too..) _Ok I'm gonna walk home now..

_Again we see Dib walking home, but now we look at Zim still walking too._

Song Starts Again

**Zim. **(is now walking home) I'm not gonna stop  
Not gonna stop 'til I get my shot  
That's who I am, that is my plan  
Will I end up on top?

You can bet on it, bet on it  
Bet on it, bet on it  
You can bet on it, bet on it  
Bet on it, bet on it

_Now we see both Zim and Dib singing. Like you know how in some movies, they put two scenes in one?  
Like the screen is split in two, and the left half is where somebody is singing and the right half is where somebody else is singing??  
Well that's what happening. Zim and Dib are singing at the same time. _

**Zim and Dib. **I wanna make it right, that is the way  
To turn my life around, today is the day!  
Am I the type of guy who means what I say?  
Bet on it, bet on it, bet on it  
(You can bet on me)

_Song is Bet on it from High School Musical 2  
_Song FINALLY Ends. 

* * *

Setting: Zim's Base  
_Zim finally ends up home. He sees Gir watching a music video on TV called, "Thriller" by Michael Jackson. You also see dancing zombies in the video._

**Zim. **This is another reason why humans are filthy. COMPUTER!

**TV. **CUZ THIS IS THRILLER! THRILLER NIGHT!...

**Computer. **(in a dull voice) WHAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAT ?

**Zim. **Voot Cruiser Repairing Status!

**Computer. **Voot Cruiser: 55 percent complete.

**Zim. **55?! But I have to get there now!

**Computer. **But wait if I --

**Zim. **Don't interrupt me while I am panicking!

**Computer. **(to himself, quietly) I was gonna say that if I speed up the repairing process it would be done in like a few minutes but I don't care anymore. I don't care about life anymore. I'm.. GOING EMU! uhh I mean EMO! I hate my life.

* * *

Setting: Dib's house  
_Dib comes back from his walk._

**Dib. **Gaz! Something so exciting happened today that I can't tell you what happened today!

**Gaz. **Then don't. Now be quiet. I'm doing a secret level of Vampire Piggy Hunter 2 and if I fail this, I have to do it all over again, SO BE QUIET!

**Dib. **Okay.. Where's dad?!

**Gaz. **Somewhere lost in the world.

**Dib. **Ok I'll be downstairs if you need me.

**Gaz. **yeah yeah...

_Dib goes downstairs to his dad's lab. He hacks into the security and gets in._

**Dib. **So if I'm going to be part of Irken Idol, I'll need a robot that could sing. Luckily, I hacked Zim's computer, too.

_Dib looks for the diagram of Gir. _

**Dib. **Here it is! His brain is made of two coins, a gumball, a paper clip, and a screw.. Does Zim even know this?! He doesn't seem to know why his robot is so stupid! But now that I have the diagram in my hands, I get to build my robot JUST LIKE HIS! But less retarded, with a REAL robot brain.

_(A/N: Anybody wonder if Dib's laptop is the Mac that brought the aliens down in Independence Day?) Time passed. It seemed like forever. But, it was only like a half hour to do it._

**Dib. **Yes! It's alive! ALIVE!!

_Dib's little robot thing looked like Gir, except his eyes were green, and well he had an actual robot brain. _

**Robot thing. **Beep..

**Dib. **I'm gonna name you.. Bob. You're name stands for Best Official Buddy!

**Bob. **Beep.. Beep..

**Dib. **Come on.. talk.. I gave you a voice box..

**Bob. **beep.. beep..

**Dib. **Oh my god! I forgot to give you a voice box! grr!!

**Bob. **Haha! I was just playing with you! Wow, so you've brought me to life.

**Dib.** Can you sing?!

**Bob. **Do, re, mi, fa, so, la, ti, DO!! Cool, I could sing!

**Dib.** Yep, and you're gonna sing with me at Irken Idol!!

**Bob. **I know. You gave me all the knowledge I need to know right here in my brain!

**Dib. **Come on! Let's go to my ship.

_You see a brilliant light flashes and you see Prof. Membrane coming in through the teleporter. _

**Membrane. **I'm back from my lab in Madagascar!

_Membrane sees Dib and starts to freak out. _

**Membrane. **SON! What are you doing here?!

**Dib. **I was making myself a robot, named Bob!

**Membrane. **Oh really?

_Membrane examines Bob really closely. _

**Membrane. **High tech, very high tech indeed. Son, I'm glad you're taking part in REAL SCIENCE!

**Dib. **Okay, Dad, but I gotta go !!

**Membrane. **Where are you going??

**Dib. **Uhm.. I'm going to save the world.. and all mankind..

**Membrane. **Does it involve leaving Earth ?

**Dib. **Yes?

**Membrane. **Okay, just take your sister with you.

**Dib. **All right, DAD! _(runs to the garage)_

**Membrane. **My son. My poor insane son.

* * *

Setting: Zim's House  
_Zim is just staying there panicking about how he'll get to space while Gir just stays there while watching Grease._

**Gir. **(singing along) GREASED LIGHTNIN'! GO GREASED LIGHTNIN'!

**Zim. **Wait! Doesn't Dib have Tak's ship? I can just ride it to space before he does! Haha! Come on Gir!

**Gir. **(singing along still) YOU'RE THE ONE THAT I WANT! OOH OOH OOH!

_(A/N: Is anybody wondering how Gir was watching the beginning of the movie and then like a few seconds later he's already at the end of it?? LOL )  
Zim grabs Gir and they run to Dib's house._

* * *

Setting: Dib's House  
_Zim and Gir are sneaking up into Dib's garage.You see Dib is getting the ship ready, Bob is standing there watching, and Gaz is in the ship playing her game._

**Zim. **Gah! Dib's already at the ship, and what is that? His robot? He looks just like Gir! Except with green eyes!

**Gir. **I got a cousin! YAY!

**Zim. **Be quiet, Gir! We're undercover!

**Dib. **Gaz, did you hear something?

**Bob. **I heard something...but it might be a squirrel or something.

**Dib.** OK! I got the ship done! Come on, Bob!

**Bob. **Okay!

* * *

Setting: SPACE

_Dib, Bob, and Gaz are blasted off into space in Tak's ship. _

**Dib. **_(looks at the screen) _Oh my god!

**Bob. **What?!

**Dib. **It takes 6 months to get there! We're never gonna make it!

**Zim. **Yeah we will!

_Zim goes to where Dib is.._

**Dib. **Zim! How'd you get here?!

**Gaz. **While you were like "Did you hear something?", Zim and Gir sneaked in.

**Dib. **Why didn't you tell me?!

**Gaz. **I thought it would be kind of funny if you didn't know Zim sneaked in.

**Dib. **Well, it's my ship! So I can kick you out!

**Zim. **Not so fast! First of all, it isn't your ship. It's TAK's ship, and SECOND, I placed a self destruct bomb in the ship and if you kick me out, I can activate it. THIRD, I know how to get to Irk in a day so if you kick me out, we'll both never get into Irken Idol, so make your choice. SEE?! I'M A GENIUS! muahahahaha!!

**Dib. **Okay. Fine. Hey wait! You're up to something! You wouldn't help me, and you would just attack me right now and kick ME out!

**Zim. **HEEELLLLP?! YOOOUU?! I would never help such a primitive species like yourself. I'm doing this for me. But I can't kick you out. Since YOU started the ship, I can't control it. It's something about Irken technology that won't let others control it.

**Dib. **Okay then..Why don't you just use your own ship??

**Zim. **Mine is still repairing from the damage that GIR caused.

**Gir. **That's me!!

**Zim. **Because of Gir, I gotta ride in this..

**Dib. **oh and IT'S MY SHIP! If it was Tak's, she would have came back to take it.

_While Zim and Dib were talking to each other about.. things, Gir was talking to Bob. _

**Gir. **Hi! You look just like me, except your GREEN!

**Bob. **Cool we're like cousins or something.

**Gir. **Yeah!

**Bob. **My name is Bob and I stand for Best Official Buddy!

**Gir. **Cool! My name is GIR! HAHA!!

**Bob. **Really? What does the G stand for?

**Gir. **I don't know_..(starts screaming random words)_

**Bob. **Either you're really stupid, or you're just really hyper..

**Gir. **I love you Bob! We're gonna be best cousins! LET'S DANCE!

**Bob. **Okay...

_Bob and Gir start dancing. The song "HAPPY HAPPY JOY JOY" starts playing. _

**Gir. **HAPPY HAPPY JOY JOY! HAPPY HAPPY JOY JOY!

**Bob. **Happy... happy... joy... joy... ??

**Gir. **I don't think you're happy enough! That's right! I'll teach you to be happy! HAPPY HAPPY JOY JOY! HAPPY HAPPY JOY JOY!

**Bob. **uhm.. HAPPY HAPPY JOY JOY!

_Bob and Gir start dancing. Gaz is just staying there playing her game.  
Zim and Dib keep talking about how they'll beat each other. _

**Zim. **Hey! What's that in your pocket?

_Zim pulls out a camera that was sticking out of Dib's pocket. _

**Zim. **What's this?

**Dib. **A camera

**Zim. **I KNOW THAT! But what's in it?

**Dib. **The evidence from when you made the hurricane.

**Zim. **Oh yeah I forgot about this one..

_Zim smashes the camera on the floor and smashed it with his foot. _

**Dib. **No! Why didn't I show that to the Swollen Eyeball Network?!

_Zim pulls out another camera._

**Zim. **And what's this ?

**Dib. **Another camera. I thought you knew what a camera was!

**Zim. **No! What's IN this?!

**Dib. **It's for Irken Idol.

_Zim smashes the camera on the floor!_

**Dib. **NOOOO!!

**Zim. **_(sniffs) _I smell something..

_Zim pulls out a hamburger from Dib's pocket. (A/N:How many things can you hold in one pocket, Dib?!) _

**Zim. **Wait! THIS IS MY HAMBURGER!

**Dib. **Maybe..?

**Zim. **Yeah it is! It has the Irken symbol on it, and I see two bites on it, DIB!

**Dib. **I had nothing to do with it!!

**Gaz. **Dib and I ate it. I was hungry. I didn't know it was yours. But Dib ate it on purpose.

**Dib. **Thanks, Gaz. I knew I could count on you.

**Zim. **No wonder you sing good! You ate my burger!

**Dib. **What do burgers have to do with singing?!

**Zim. **Nothing! But IRKEN burgers have a lot to do with singing! There's an ingredient in it called Chemical X! For us Irkens, it's a really healthy substance that keeps us healthy.

**Dib. **BUT I ATE CHEMICAL X !! WHAT DOES AN UNSTABLE CHEMICAL HAVE TO DO WITH SINGING?!

**Zim. **Chemical X makes other species sing good. It's like taking steroids for singing. But, we don't need Chemical X to sing good.

**Gir. **Hey! The Powerpuff Girls were made from Chemical X !!

**Dib. **Wait! Does that mean.. I'm a Powerpuff Girl?!

**Zim.** You find that out yourself... HAHAHAHAHA!!

**Dib.** Okay so how do we get there in a day??

**Zim. **There's a time warp. just go in through there (_Zim points to a pretty swirly blue portal thing)_

**Dib. **Okay.. WAIT! That looks like the wormhole that leads me to the room with a moose!

**Zim. **It's a time warp! Would you really believe that I would lead this ship to the room with a moose with ME in it?!

**Dib. **Hope you know what you're doing...

_Dib leads the ship to the time warp.. _

**Will they ever make it to Planet Irk?? Will Gaz ever finish that secret level?? Will Dib be a POWERPUFF GIRL?! TO BE CONTINUED!! HAHAHA!!**

* * *

**Okay time for more disclaimers: I don't own Invader Zim. I don't own Bet on it; High School Musical 2 does. I don't own Happy Happy Joy Joy. Ren and Stimpy owns Happy Happy Joy Joy. The Powerpuff Girls own Chemical X. I don't own the Powerpuff Girls. I don't own Grease. I DON'T OWN ANYTHING, except for Bob of course. I made Bob, too. OH MY GOSH! So much DISCLAIMERS! Why do we have to put disclaimers for Invader Zim? We all know the Jhonen dude owns it. Anyway, what did you think? I know it took me a while to make Chapter 2, but school was here and there and I have an oral book presentation to work on! But I got too lazy to do it and I decided to finish this chapter first lol. This is like one of the many chapters I made in my life that was like.. LONG. It was a long chapter. so REVIEW!! REEVIEEWWW!! REVIEW NOW OR I'LL LOCK YOU IN A ROOM WITH GIR SINGING THE DOOM SONG IN A WAY YOU WOULD THINK IS ANNOYING! HAHAHA!! CHEMICAL X! **


	3. Built In Toilet

**I'll put disclaimers later because I never know what new thing I might add to the story. My story is now gonna take place on different dimensions!****

* * *

Irken Idol  
Chapter 3**

**Invaderzimfannumber1**'s Dimension

Setting: Zim's Base  
_Amethyst, Zim's daughter, and Kierra, her SIR unit, were partying, singing, and dancing. Gir is dancing, too._

**Amethyst. **Dancing queen! Feel the beat from the tambourine! OH YEAHH!!

**Kierra. **You can dance! You can jive! Having the time of your life!

_Zim appears through a teleporter that happened to be in the room._

**Zim. **IT'S DONE! IT'S FINALLY DONE!!

**Amethyst. **What is done, dad?

**Zim. **My dimension machine of doom! It's called the Dimension Machine of Doom Thing... of Doom! I made it myself!

**Kierra. **Wow that name is so original.

**Amethyst. **Sounds awesome! Can I see it?

**Kierra. **Let's go see it!

_They all go to the conveniently placed teleporter and get teleported to his space station... of DOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOM!_

Setting: Zim's Space Station  
_Zim leads Amethyst and Kierra to his amazing machine of AWESOMENESS!_

**Zim. **Here it is!

**Amethyst. **Wow!

_The machine was a portal that looks just like that displacement time machine thing from "Bad Bad Rubber Piggy" but with different buttons and a bigger screen._

**Zim. **Look at my AMAAAZIIIIINGG machine while I go look for something and completely not pay attention to what you might do!

_Zim walks away to look for something and completely not pays attention to what Amethyst might do.  
Kierra then walks next to Amethyst eating a delicious, soft, chocolate chip sugar cookie.  
_

**Amethyst. **Kierra! I didn't know you eat food!

**Kierra. **Neither did I... Ohmygod, Gir's CONTAGIOUS!

**Amethyst. **Ooh! What does this button do?

_Amethyst presses a shiny gold button on the dimension machine. Something appears on the screen.  
The screen says, "What dimension would you like to go to?"_

**Amethyst. **Awesome! What should I type?

**Kierra. **Type "cookie."

**Amethyst. **Why?

**Kierra. **I don't know. It's all I'm thinking of considering the fact that I'm eating one right now.

**Amethyst. **Ok...

_She types "cookie."  
The screen says "Searching... Searching..."_

**Amethyst. **Wow. Even Google is faster than this.

_After five minutes of searching, the screen comes up with a list of names with the word "cookie" in them._

CookieLuvahhXD  
**Cookie** Naegle  
The **Cooki** Monster  
**Cookies**94  
Lucid **Cookie**  
**Cookie** Teddy  
**Cookie** Dough1  
Sugary**Cookie**  
TwentyFour**Cookies**  
Dib**Cookie**  
x**Cookie**Munsturrrx  
kisa sohma **cookie**  
Animal**Cookie**  
The-Evil-**Cookie**  
Quick**Cookie**  
MysticFortune**Cookie**  
**Cookie**243Monster  
Russian**Cookie**  
**cookies**-n-cream08

Page 1  
Next Page... 

_(A/N: These are real FanFiction names that have "cookie" in them.)  
_

**Amethyst. **Wow, they are the weirdest names to name a dimension. CookieLuvahhXD is the worst dimension name I've ever heard of.

_She picks the one that says "_CookieLuvahhXD_."  
The screen says "Do you want to come to _CookieLuvahhXD_'s dimension? Yes or No?"  
Then, a giant, shiny, golden YES button and a tiny, not shiny, black NO button pops out._

**Amethyst. **I'll wait until my dad gets here before I do anything else.

_Gir comes randomly running out of nowhere covered in and dripping in slippery soap water._

**Gir. **Where's my biscuit? WHERE'S MY BISCUIT?

**Amethyst. **What is he talking about?

**Kierra. **I think he's talking about my cookie!

**Gir. **My biscuit!

_He starts running to Kierra. To keep him from tackling her, Kierra threw the cookie in the air. The cookie lands near the dimension machine. Gir runs to the cookie so fast that he bumped into the machine. The floor was now covered in slippery soap water. Gir found the cookie and started eating it._

**Amethyst. **Phew! At least Gir didn't accidentally push that giant "YES" button.

_Gir sees the shiny-ness of the giant "YES" button. _

**Gir. **What does this button do?

**Amethyst and Kierra. **NO!

_They ran to Gir to try and stop him, BUT IT WAS TOO LATE! By the time they went there, the button was pressed. A swirly blue portal starts to form in the machine. Gir saw Amethyst and Kierra running towards him and thought that it was some kind of love scene that you would see in a movie, so he started running to them too._

**Gir. **I LOVE YOU!

_Amethyst and Kierra see that Gir is running towards them._

**Amethyst and Kierra. **AAAHHH!!!

_They try to stop running but the floor was so slippery that when they tried to stop running, they just started to slip and they had no control over themselves! When Gir ran to them, they tripped over him and fell into the dimension portal! Gir watched as they were being teleported into a different dimension._

**Gir. **Aww. They gone... I gonna follow them!! WHEEE!!

_Gir runs into the portal. Unfortunately, the portal was fragile to soap, so when Gir ran through it, the machine broke.  
Then Zim comes back into the room. He looks around to see what happened. The first thing that caught his sight was the soap covered floor.  
_

**Zim. **Amethyst? Kierra??! Gir??!?!! ... Where could they possibly be?! Were they eating Gir's waffles again?! I told him not to make them any waffles! SWEET NIBBLETS!... Darn it! I can't believe I let Gir make me watch Hannah Montana with him!

* * *

CookieLuvahhXD's Dimension (ME!)

Setting: Zim's Base  
_Amethyst and Kierra fall from the ceiling to the floor of Zim's house._

**Amethyst and Kierra. **Ouch!

_Then, Gir fell from the ceiling and on top of both of them._

**Gir. **Whee! Let's do that again!

**Kierra. **Where are we?

**Amethyst. **I'm guessing we're in CookieLuvahhXD's dimension.

**Kierra. **Really? This looks like the same base back at home, just without the karaoke machine and the conveniently placed teleporter that teleports us to the space station.

**Amethyst. **We should go back!

**Kierra. **How? We fell from the ceiling, and there's no visible swirling portal for us to try and go back in through!

_Gir turns on the TV that happened to be on the Irken Idol commercial.  
A message comes on the screen saying, "_This commercial is being sent to every world of every galaxy of every universe of every dimension._"  
Then the commercial comes on. _(A/N: If you wanna know what the commercial is, read the first chapter.)

_Then a message comes on at the end and it says, "_Irken Idol is taking place on planet Irk. It has been dimensionally fixed so Irken Idol takes place on every dimension, so it may be possible to see different versions of yourself because they may be from a different dimension. Don't think they are a clone of you. When you go back to your home planet, you will automatically be on the planet of the dimension from which you originally came from. If you don't believe this message and that you want to think that others are clones, then you're crazy._  
_P.S. This message is only visible to those who knows that there is such thing as aliens and those who know that Planet Irk is : THIS MESSAGE JUST GOT ADDED TODAY._"_

**Amethyst. **Are you thinking what I'm thinking?

**Kierra. **That the message at the end of the commercial was extremely long and that the person reading the message aloud was so fast that it sounded like he was saying one whole word?

**Amethyst. **Yeah THAT, and that we should join Irken Idol!

**Kierra. **But why? We're in a whole different dimension! Your dad might be worried!

**Amethsyt. **Kierra, this may be our only chance to show the whole universe what we're made of! Besides, we'll get that death machine when we win and once Irken Idol is done, we can come back home to the planet of the dimension from which we originally came from! When we come home, we're gonna tell dad "WE GOT A DEATH MACHINE." Then, we're gonna explain what happened and then say that it was all Gir's fault. He'll understand. If he asks, "Why did you join Irken Idol?" I'll just tell him the same thing I just told you; WE WANTED TO SHOW THE UNIVERSE HOW GOOD WE WERE!

**Kierra. **Yeah.. uh-huh... okay so how are we gonna get there?

**Amethyst. **We're in Zim's house, aren't we? We'll just use his spaceship to get there. Speaking of Zim, where is he?

**Kierra. **He might be doing something to stop Dib or something.

**Amethyst. **He won't mind if we used his spaceship. Let's go!

(A/N: Amethyst isn't calling Zim her dad because she's in a DIFFERENT dimension so Zim isn't her dad in MY dimension because in MY stories, Zim doesn't have a child, nor will EVER have one.)

**Gir. **Oooh! I wanna come!

_They all go to the spaceship and go to space. _

Setting: Space

**Amethyst. **...uhh...

**Kierra. **Let me guess; you don't know how to get there.

**Amethyst. **Good guess..

**Kierra. **Oh great! (sigh)

**Gir. **Wait! I know how to go there, I think..

**Amethyst and Kierra. **You're thinking?!

**Gir. **Master gave me a new guidy chippy thingy. I forgot to leave it at home...

**Amethyst. **Okay, where is Irk?

**Gir. **Uhm... it's over there.

_Gir points to a time warp.  
Amethyst leads the ship to the time warp and they're headed straight for Irk._

**Amethyst. **Kierra?

**Kierra. **What?

**Amethyst. **Don't you have a guide chip thing, too?

**Kierra. **No. Mine broke. My chip was fragile to soap.

**Amethyst. **I'll ask my dad to get you a new one WHEN WE WIN IRKEN IDOL!

**Amethyst, Kierra, and Gir. **YEAAH!!

* * *

**Note: Okay people we're gonna do a scene switch to Zim, Gir, Dib, Gaz, and Bob.**

**

* * *

**Setting: Space (AGAIN)  
_Ten hours passed. Fourteen more hours to go.  
Everybody in the ship was sleeping, including Gir and Bob.  
You hear obnoxious snoring in the background.  
The ship was on auto-pilot and Zim is just sitting there, probably being bored, or planning his next evil plan._

**Zim. **Okay for my next evil plan, I will...

**Dib. **(talking in his sleep) *SNORE* must expose Zim *SNORE* I'm gonna stop you... *SNORE* three more feet to exposing Zim...*SNORE* I will take off disguise NOW *SNORE* Hooray for Earth...*SNOOOOORE*

**Zim. **Hooray for Earth?! What the heck is Dib dreaming about?!

Setting: Dib's Dream  
_Everybody was cheering for Dib. _

**Everybody. **HOORAY FOR EARTH! HOORAY FOR EARTH!

**Britney Spears. **I LOVE YOU, DIB!

**Jessie McCartney. **NO! I LOVE DIB MORE!

**Britney Spears. **NO! I LOVE DIB MORE!

**Dib. **Girls, girls, relax! There's enough of Dib to go around.

_All the girls scream. Then Dib went crowd-surfing back home._

**Dib. **Best day ever. I'm gonna sleep now. *SNORE*

_Music starts to play outside. Dib wakes up on his bed._

**Dib. **What music could possibly be playing without featuring me in it? They probably must be celebrating my waking up of the morning.

_Dib looks out the window. He saw it. They weren't cheering for him... they were cheering for..._

Music starts in the tune of We Will Rock You by Queen  
_Zim was sitting on a throne with a crown on his head.  
Gir was right next to him talking to a girl cow._

**Zim. **(singing) The AMAZING Zim just ruled the world  
Making human slaves that was easy as CHEESY PIE  
These lyrics don't rhyme  
But I don't care  
Because if I ruled the world it doesn't matter

**Zim. **I WILL I WILL RULE YOU! (2x)

**Gir. **(singing and shouting for no reason) I LOVE TO MAKE SOAPY WAFFLES  
I LIKE TO EAT FOOD AND WATCH ANGRY MONKEYS  
LET'S HAVE IT OUR WAY  
AT BURGER QUEEN  
OR GRAB SOME TACOS AT THE KRAZY TACO!

**Zim. **I WILL I WILL RULE YOU! (2x)

**Cow. **(not singing) Moo!

_Dib runs outside to see Zim._

**Dib. **(singing) Zim, what just happened did you rule the world?  
**Zim. **(still singing) Yes, I did Dib. Are you stupid? I just sang half the song.  
Now bow down to me  
THE AMAZING ZIM  
and then you'll be a slave just like the rest of them

**Zim. **I WILL I WILL RULE YOU! (2x)

**Dib. **(not singing) I WILL NEVER BOW DOWN TO YOU!

**Zim. **(not singing) HAHAHAA!! We'll just see about that.

**Zim. **(singing again) My stupid slaves go and fetch the boy  
Lock him in a room of pain and torture  
Tell all your old dogs  
To chew on his head  
Chew on his head until he is sad!

_ The slaves go to Dib, grab him, and drag him in a room of pain and torture._

**Dib. **NOOO!!!!!

Music Ends.

Setting: The SpaceShip  
_Dib wakes up from his horrible nightmare. There were a bunch of wires implanted in Dib's giant head and they lead to a machine that Zim invented.  
The invention was shaped like a soda can, but it was a lot larger, like as tall as Zim. It had a giant 1080P HDTV attached to it. There was a little keyboard with little complicated buttons on it. _(A/N: I always make Zim invent a machine with a screen on it, and 1080P means 1080 progressive and HDTV means high definition television.)

**Dib. **Zim! Aren't you tired? It's 2 AM in the morning!

**Zim. **Time does not matter in space, you stupid monkey. I don't sleep...

_He notices that he almost gave away his identity as an alien although he knew that Dib knew who he really was._

**Dib. **Why not? Because you're an ALIEN?!

**Zim. **Because... I drink lots of coffee!...

**Dib. **There is no coffee here..

**Zim. **You are not coffee!

_Dib sees the big soda can shaped machine._

**Dib. **... What is this? You're NEW PLAN?!

**Zim. **I am literally crushing your dreams!

**Dib. **NOOOO!!

**Zim. **YESSS!!! MUAHAHAHAHAAA!!

_Zim does his really really loud evil laugh.  
Gaz wakes up from her sleep._

**Gaz. **Who woke me up?!

_Her eyes start to glow RED!  
Zim points to Dib.  
Gaz beats him up then goes back to sleep._

**Dib. **You JERK! Why is Gir sleeping? Why is BOB even sleeping?? They're robots!

**Zim. **You're so stupid. Everybody knows robots sleep.

**Dib. **No, they don't, and neither do you. So, SHUT YOUR PIEHOLE!

**Zim. **I don't have pie! You're so dumb that you make Gir seem smart!

**Dib. **That was a figure of speech!

_Thirteen more hours passed. One more hour left. Everybody is awake.  
Gaz is playing her Game Slave 4.  
Dib is controlling the ship. Zim is trying to show him the way.  
Gir and Bob are eating tomato sauce._

**Gir. **... and that how I be a house!

**Bob. **Wow, I never knew there was such thing as a taco beam. Tomato sauce is good!

**Gir. **You should eat tacos! They really good!!

**Zim. **I'm telling you! IT'S OVER THERE!

**Dib. **I know where I'm going!

**Gaz. **You guys fight like one of those old couples! SO BE QUIET!

**Dib and Zim. **But...!

_Gaz gives them her death glare of doom. They kept quiet._

**Gaz. **Where's the bathroom?

**Zim. **I don't have one.

**Dib. **Why?

**Zim. **I don't urinate.

**Dib. **Why? Because you're an ALIEN..?

**Zim. **I don't drink! You can't urinate if you don't drink!

**Dib. **You said you drink coffee!

**Zim. **YOU'RE coffee!

**Gaz. **YOU'RE idiots! Dib! Zim! If you don't let me urinate, I will hurt you so bad that you wished you had a REAL toilet shoved up your--

**Dib. **BOB!

**Bob. **Yes, master!

**Dib. **Let Gaz URINATE!

**Bob. **It's okay, Gaz, everyone has to urinate, well except for me!

**Gir. **AND ME!

**Dib. **AND ZIM!

**Zim. **NONSENSE! I do BUSINESS!

**Dib. **And you think I would believe you were doing number 2 in the bathroom for 3 hours that day??

**Zim. **NUMBERS?! You number your wastes?!

**Gaz. **WILL YOU TWO SHUT UP?! Bob, I don't think that trying to cheer me up from holding it in won't help!!

**Bob. **I'm a built-in toilet!

_Bob turns into a built-in toilet._

**Gaz. **Where do all the pee go?

**Bob. **I filter all the water and make it clean for drinking water!

**Gaz. **Drinking water? And who's exactly been peeing in you??

**Bob. **Dib...

**Gaz. **So all this time, the water I've been drinking was Dib's PEE?? DIIIIIIIIIIB!

_Gaz looks FURIOUS!_

**Dib. **NO! NO! NOOOO!!

_This scene is censored. FIVE MINUTES LATER, Dib looks like he got run over by a train. He was BLEEDING to death!_

**Zim. **HAHA! (IN HIS MIND: I can use his sister to get rid of that Dib ONCE AND FOR ALL! HAHA! Oh no wait, No one can hear my evil laugh. Let me laugh out loud.) MUAHAHAHA!!

_Bob goes over to Dib and fixes him.  
FIVE MORE MINUTES LATER! Dib looks all better. It's like he never got hurt. What do you expect? It's a cartoon!_

**Dib. **Thank you, Bob.

**Zim. **Why does Bob look a lot like Gir??

**Dib. **UHH?!

**Gir. **I think that Dib hacked into your computer files to find my diagram, thus making him create Bob in the likeness of me.

**Dib. **What the--

**Zim. **You! YOU COPIED MY SIR UNIT!

**Dib. **But... But I--

_Zim looks mad. _

**Zim. **When we get back home, I'm gonna invent poisonous gumballs and stick them in your MOUTH!

**Dib. **You're inventing balls?

**Zim.** So you could be FORCED to suck on them.

_He does his evil laugh but Gaz interuppts._

**Gaz. **You're making Dib suck on your balls?

**Zim. **YESS I'M EVVIL!!

**Gaz. **No.. you're just wrong, so wrong on so many levels...

**Zim. **THERE IT IS!! IRKEN IDOL!

_Zim points to planet Irk._

* * *

**END OF CHAPTER 3 !!! Dudes.. Sorry if I didn't let them go to planet Irk yet but I haven't been updating for a while and this is like the longest chapter I've ever done in my life so I might as well post it. I promise you guys the next chapter, they're going to be on Planet Irk. :D**

**I don't own the song Dancing Queen; Abba owns the song. I don't own Amethyst or Kierra or Invaderzimfannumber1's version of Zim and Gir; invaderzimfannumber1 owns them. If you don't understand why Amethyst is Zim's daughter, you have to go read invaderzimfannumber1's stories. I own the Dimension Machine of Doom Thing of Doom but she has permission to use them in her stories YAY! I don't own Google; Google owns Google, I think. I don't own FanFiction (duhh) and I also don't own the names that had the word "cookie" in them. I also do not own Hannah Montana, and also not a big fan of it. The phrase "sweet nibblets" just popped up in my head. I do not own Britney Spears, but I do own Jessie McCartney, for she is my character based off of Jesse McCartney. I don't own the song We Will Rock You; Queen does. All I did was change the lyrics and add one more verse. I own Burger Queen and it's based off of Burger KING! Oh and I have nothing against dogs. I absolutely love them. =]**

**Please REVIEW, or R&R ? Can anyone tell me what R&R mean? NO FLAMERS or FLAMING!! Can anyone also tell me what flamers are or what flaming is? I know they're bad but I don't exactly know what they mean. I also found out that when you add an O at the end of FLAMING it spells FLAMINGO! HAHA!  
**


	4. George Lopez !

**Yay!! Chapter Four of Irken Idol!! Disclaimers at bottom. [;  
NOTE: When I make all the letters in a word uppercase, that means it is emphasized. I changed the rating to T for sexual humor (in the previous chapter) and some censored swearing in this chapter. I know it's censored, but you can never be too safe, right?!  
**

**

* * *

**

**Irken Idol  
Chapter 4: GEORGE LOPEZ ?!  
**

Setting: Planet Irk!  
_Dib brings the ship to Planet Irk. They park his ship all the way in the parking lot for spaceships.  
Then, Zim, Gir, Dib, Bob, and Gaz walked to the big Irken Idol building, also known as THE BUILDING!  
Dib recorded everything in his mini HD camera. Zim saw what he was doing and smashed his camera TO PIECES!! HAHA!!_

**Dib. **NOOO!!!

**Zim. **Watch it, Dib. I know ALL your moves!!

**Dib. **Well, do you know THIS?!

_Dib runs to Zim and kicks him on the leg._

**Zim. **OWW!!

**Dib. **HAHAHA!! Come on, BOB!

_Dib and Bob run away to the sign-up booth._

**Zim. **HIM!

**Gir. **FRENCH CHEESY POO!!

**Gaz. **.....?

_Meanwhile, Dib was at the sign-up booth._

**Dib. **We would like to join Irken Idol.

_Fred, the person who signs them up, says something in Irken._

**Dib. **I don't understand... oh man I forgot that Irkens speak Irken!!

**Bob. **He asked for your name.

**Dib. **_(to the person)_ Oh, my name is Dib.  
_(to Bob)_ How did you know that?

**Fred. **Okay, Dib, just go in there to wait for auditions. Sorry, if I wasn't speaking to you in your language.. I was talking to myself...

**Dib. **You were??.... That's stupid.

**Fred. **At least my head isn't so big!

**Dib. **My head's not big!!

**Fred. **SECURITY!

_Security comes._

**Security. **Yes?

**Fred. **Take this "DIB" away from me.

**Dib. **Why?!

**Fred. **You're not allowed to go to Irken Idol anymore. You talk bad to me, you're not goin' in! NEVER mess with the FRED!

**Dib.** Talk bad to you?? All I did was tell you that my head is NOT BIG!

**Security. **Your head is big? Hey, you look like the BANANA KING! Doesn't he look like the banana king, FRED?!

**Fred. **Oh yeahh... Oh.. I'm sorry, Dib. You may go right ahead to Irken Idol.

**Dib. **_(to Bob) _I see being the banana king has its advantages.

_Zim and Gir are running towards Dib. Gaz is slowly walking behind them, playing her new game "Game Slave VI." (VI means 6!)_

**Zim. **BI--(censored)

**Gir. **MONKEYS ATE MY PIGGY!! PIIIIGGGYYY!!!

**Gaz. **I can't believe I have to go with these morons. _(goes to Fred) _

**Fred. **So are you signing up?

**Gaz. **No, I'm with Dib.

**Fred. **No, YOU HAVE TO SIGN UP TO GET IN!

**Dib. **Don't worry, Fred, she's with me.

**Fred. **Anything for Your Majesty.

**Dib. **Wow, now this is what I call the "royal treatment!" Hahaa..

**Gaz. **You got that quote from Spongebob.

**Fred. **WAIT! Don't forget your numbers!

_Fred gives Dib and Bob two papers (one for Dib and one for Bob) with a number on it. They say, "22,021."  
Dib and Gaz and Bob go in The Building._

**Zim. **Fred, I'm joining Irken Idol. Sign me up with Gir. He's my robot.

_Fred just stares at Zim._

**Zim. **Okay.... we'll be going now....

_Zim and Gir start walking towards The Building.  
Fred calls SECURITY! Two REALLY BUFF security guards come to him._

_Then, he says something to them. The security run to Zim and Gir and grabs them.  
They drag him over to Fred._

**Zim.** Hey! What's going on here?! I SIGNED UP!

_Zim struggles to be free, but can't because security is TIGHT! Get it?? It's a pun!_

**Fred. **Not exactly. Security people! SCAN HIM!

_Security people take out an unfamiliar scanner and scans Zim and Gir. They're scanner says starts blinking RED!!_

**Zim. **What's that? A metal detector? How can you detect me with metal? I have nothing metal on me, except My PAK! That is all metal! I can't take it off!! I'll DIE!

**Fred. **That's a dimension scanner. You see, you came from CookieLuvahhXD's dimension.

**Zim. **So?

**Fred. **SO.... you are known as the defect that Irk hates most. Remember Impending Doom I? Planet Irk from CookieLuvahhXD's dimension, which is THIS ONE, ORIGINALLY made Irken Idol. It has only been dimensionally fixed so people from every other dimension can come, too. So, if another Zim from another dimension comes, it won't matter because he wasn't originally from here.

**Zim. **.....So? What does this have to do with ME?!

**Fred. **...A LOT! We can't have you coming in and DESTROYING Irken Idol, TOO!

**Zim.** I STILL DON'T GET IT! What if another Zim comes and destroys it!

**Fred. **He won't. We put some kind of enhanced technology that we just invented here on Irk.  
After the Zims sign up here, I secretly put some kind of awesome chip on their PAK so whenever  
he has the need to destroy ANYTHING at all here on this planet, he'll get electrocuted.  
Don't you get it Zim? It's called negative reinforcement! They'll only work on this planet.  
BUT, our chips don't work on the ORIGINAL Zim (from CookieLuvahhXD's dimension;; that's this one!)  
so we are going to have to put you in trial...So....

**Zim. **You can stop talkin' now because all I hear is blahh... blah.. blahh....

**Fred. **YOU'RE GOING TO TRIAL!

**Zim. **Again?! Do I really have to go? But, we all know how this is gonna end!

* * *

FLASHBACK BEGINS!

Setting: Planet Judgementia  
_Someone ascends on a platform in the center of the cruel looking room. Three IRKEN CONTROL BRAINS hover before the bound and blindfolded figure. Huge Monitors announce "ZIM" in monstrous letters. Shadowy spectators watch from balconies lining the spike's interior. Very impressive._

**THE BRAINS**. IRKEN: ZIM. Your time has come. Prepare yourself for all you deserve.

_ZIM's restraints detach. His blinders remove themselves. He looks around, noticing the crowd behind him and the images of his face and name that are displayed on huge floating monitors._

**ZIM** Heyyy, a surprise party? Is that what this is all about? I was wondering why I was beaten up and transported from Earth to this place! A PARTY FOR ZIM!!!

**THE BRAINS** SILENCE! All will be made clear, ZIM!

_Their eyes glow strangely, their voices ECHO ominously throughout the chamber._

FLASHBACK INTERRUPTED.

_

* * *

_

Setting: Outside Irken Idol Building

**Fred. **And then.... you wanted to make a quick call to your robot....

**Zim. **I know what happens next!! I'm trying to tell you how it's gonna end!!

* * *

FLASHBACK CONTINUES!

Setting: Planet Judgementia

**THE BRAINS** OUR RULING: IRKEN ZIM's I.D PAK is damaged and has led to a corrupt data path. HE IS... A DEFECTIVE.

_RED and PURPLE look ecstatic. ZIM seems to shrink._

**THE BRAINS** IRKEN ZIM's data is not allowed to into the collective. His PAK will be removed, and erased.

**ZIM **_(HORRIFIED)_ But I can't LIVE without my PAK

**PURPLE** _(LOUD AND INSINCERE)_ AWWW... WOW. Too bad. TOUGH ONE, ZIM.

_ZIM's PAK is removed. The data cables connect to it and start sucking out data.  
ZIM watches a monitor, horrified, as the data-stream is shown leaving a ZIM icon and flowing into a trashcan icon. His life is ending. _

**ZIM** _(PANICKING)_ No... THIS IS A MISTAKE!! Have I mentioned that I AM ZIM!!!??

_The BRAINS' eyes flash with the data flowing into them. We  
follow the cables going into their bodies and enter..._

Setting: FREAKY CYBERNETIC ZONE

_This world inside of the brains is a virtual reality void  
where ZIM's memories flood out of portholes into the surreal  
techno-landscape. ZIM's voice echoes through the void,  
ringing with familiar sayings from previous episodes._

**THE BRAINS** Something wrong... so much... bad data... passing through us all at once... cannot process... the horror... Going... insane!

Setting: PLANET JUDGEMENTIA

_SPARKS shoot out of the BRAINS. GIBBERISH is issued from  
their speakers.  
ZIM is suddenly released from his restraints. He looks up in  
amazement. The TALLEST watch, confused. ZIM's PAK is  
replaced and he seems to gain energy from it._

**THE BRAINS** _(INSANE)_ INVADER ZIM, for your heinous crimes... we declare you... THE MOST INCREDIBLE IRKEN EVER!!!

**ZIM**_ (HAPPY)_ Hey, thanks. I really am.

**PURPLE** NO!! YOU CAN'T DO THAT! He's a DEFECTIVE! You ALREADY ruled!

**THE BRAINS**_ (BUZZING AND INSANE)_ Ohhh, LIGHTEN UP! LITTLE...BUMBLE BEE...aargh...THE MADNESS...

_THE TALLEST just stare at the lunatic BRAINS in disbelief.  
ZIM turns on the charm for the cameras that float around him._

**THE BRAINS **AND for being YOU, ZIM, we grant you ten free minutes of piloting the MASSIVE!!

Setting: SPACE  
_THE MASSIVE careens through space._

Setting: in the Massive!  
_ZIM pilots the Massive like a little boy drives a go cart at  
an amusement park. The TALLEST stand behind him, weeping._

**ZIM**_ (THE HAPPIEST IRKEN IN SPACE)_ WOOOOHOOOOOO!!!!!! You guys really had me going! Thank you, MY TALLEST!!

FLASHBACK FINALLY ENDS!

* * *

Setting: Outside Irken Idol Building

**Fred. **Nonsense! The Control Brains are now better than ever! Like I said before, YOU'RE GOING TO TRIAL!

**Zim**. You don't have the right!

**Fred. **Yes, I do! I saved My Tallests from the evil food monsters, the muffin tacos and the waffle pickles... or was it the pickle tacos and muffin waffles... NO MATTER! My Tallests GAVE me the right! Security! SEND HIM AWAY!!

**Zim. **YOU WILL PAY!!!

_The security people drag Zim and Gir away to The Trial building._

_

* * *

_Setting: The Trial Building  
_The security go down the halls into the big room where the gargantuan Control Brains are.  
Apparently, there's someone else in there, so they brought Zim and Gir down to more halls and then they stop at a door._

_They did an eye can, a fingerprint scan, a hand scan, a tongue scan, a foot scan, a nose scan, and a butt scan (Do Irkens have butts? I'm not sure).  
They walk through MORE halls and then stop at another door. This time, they did a knee scan and dialed some numbers in the password thing._

_Then, they violently throw Zim and Gir into the room.  
The room is all white and empty. There are cameras and lasers surrounding the room._

**Security Guy #1. **Don't even try to get out! There's tight security around here; cameras, lasers, and a whole bunch of scans to go through things. AND this room is SOUNDPROOF so you can't call for help!

**Security Guy #2. **Yeah, and your PAK can't break you out either because there's a neurotoxin in here that causes your PAK to not work;; that means no weapons or lasers or whatever you have in there won't work. The only thing it can do for you is make you LIVE, for a while.

_The security guys laugh their butts off as they walk away as the slam the door, shutting Zim and Gir in the isolated room. (I have so much vocabulary today, don't I?)_

**Zim. **GRR!!! Now we can never get to Irken Idol now!!

**Gir. **I wanna sing!! _(cries)_

**Zim. **Gir, STOP CRYING! You're gonna make me deaf!

**Gir. **Okay....

_Gir pulls out a Krabby Patty so he can eat it._

**Zim. **There must be SOME way to get out of here!!

* * *

Setting: Outside Irken Idol Building  
_Meanwhile, outside The Trial Building, there is Amethyst, Kierra, and Gir. They are walking to Fred to sign up for Irken Idol.  
_

**Amethyst.** Hi, I'm signing up. My SIR unit is Kierra. This is Gir and he's with us. This is my dad's SIR unit, but he's not here and we have to have Gir with us.

**Fred. **Gir? Isn't that Zim's robot?

_Fred gets suspicious. Is this Zim dressed up as a girl just so he could sneak in??_

**Amethyst. **You know Zim?

**Fred. **Yeah. He's the only Irken that has a robot with that name AND he ruined Planet Irk a lot more than every other enemy planet COMBINED into one!

**Amethyst. **What can I say? It was just one little slip...

**Fred. **So...are you a female?

**Amethyst. **Yes

**Fred. **Is that a SIR unit?

**Amethyst. **Yes....

**Fred. **Are you going to sing a song?

**Amethyst. **_(IN HER MIND: He asks the most stupid questions..) _YES.....well of course. It's Irken Idol. I HAVE TO SING...!!_ (getting pissed)_

**Fred. **Oh.... Okay..... so it's Jennifer?

**Amethyst. **NO IT'S AMETHYST! ARE YOU STUPID OR SOMETHING?! THE NAMES AREN'T EVEN CLOSE, YOU FFFFILTHY...._(looks at his nametag)..._FRED!! (_ohmygod! SHE'S MAD!)_

_Fred just stares at her..._

**Amethyst. **Sorry... I just... wanna sing.. and uhh....I REALLY wanna get inside...

**Fred. **_(IN HIS MIND: THAT'S IT! Once I get her mad enough, she'll reveal herself as ZIM!) _So...are you joining Irken Idol?  
**  
Amethyst. **JUST SIGN ME UP ALREADY!! _(her eyes were practically on fire. she was getting ready to kill him!!)_

**Fred. **_ (IN HIS MIND: It's still not working!! I guess I'll do this THE HARD WAY!)  
_

_Fred tries to pull Amethyst's blond hair.  
_

**Amethyst. **OW! STOP IT! Why did you PULL my hair?!

**Fred. **Aren't you Zim?!

**Amethyst. **NO! HE'S MY DAD!! WHAT WOULD MAKE YOU THINK I'M HIM?

**Fred. **Well... you act like him...

**Kierra. **See, Master? Not only I see you act like your dad.

**Fred. **Do you know what dimension you are from?

**Amethyst. **I'm not sure. I just know I'm not from here. I went through a dimension machine and ended up here.

**Fred. **Okay... just to make sure...

_Fred takes out a scanner and scans her._

**Fred. **It says that you're from invaderzimfannumber1's dimension and that you're not Zim.

**Amethyst. **I TOLD YOU!!

_Amethyst and Kierra were walking towards The Building! Then, Gir smells something delicious._

**Gir. **Krabby Patty?! KRABBY PATTY!!

_Gir follows the scent to The Trial Building. He runs after it while still dripping in very slippery soap water._

**Kierra. **Gir!! COME BACK HERE! Ohmygod....

_Kierra runs after Gir to try and catch him._

**Amethyst. **So what song do you think we should sing....Kierra? Where'd you go?

_She sees Kierra running after Gir who is running after the Krabby Patty scent towards The Trial Building._

**Amethyst. **Nothing I do is ever easy anymore!

_She runs after Kierra and Gir.  
Gir is running. He goes INSIDE The Trial Building._

_

* * *

_Setting: The Trial Building  
_Then he goes down a big giant hallway! He follows the scent towards a big door.  
It had a security camera and lasers. The camera sees Gir and starts shooting lasers at him._

_Because of Gir's awesome reflexes, he dodges them with quick speed. Then, he runs right INTO the door!  
The door became weak and broke, letting Gir through with ease._

_As he ran, all the security cameras and any other security thing broke._  
_Amethyst and Kierra follow the trail of soap water that Gir is leaving behind._

_Gir ran down another hall then stopped at another door with more security!  
Gir runs through THAT as the door broke and everything else around it broke too.  
How does he do that??_

**Amethyst. **How does he do that? Why is Gir still covered in that soap water?

**Kierra. **That's how destructive Gir is now.

**Amethyst. **What?

**Kierra. **Soap KILLS foreign technology. Face it; our enhanced, developed, and advanced industrial science is no match for human sanitation.

**Amethyst. **That's stupid, but it does make sense. We just have to make sure Dib doesn't know that.

**Kierra. **Yeah...

**Amethyst. **Ohmygod! Come on, Kierra!! LET'S GO SUPER SPEED!

_Amethyst holds Kierra and then Amethyst runs REALLY FAST to catch up with Gir._

_Gir is still running down that same hall.  
Then he stops at a door. He runs through that door, too, and then it breaks._

_As soon as Gir came into the room, all the security technology that was  
guarding the room BROKE! Some powerful soap, huh?  
_

_In the little room, there was Zim and _Gir_ eating a krabby patty.  
Then, _*Gir_ saw the krabby patty and wanted to eat it, too._

(A/N: If you're confused, read the next few sentences.)  
Remember how Zim and Gir were stuck in a room because security people put them there?  
Gir took out a krabby patty to eat while Zim sat, thinking of a way to get out.  
Well, a different Gir (that was with Amethyst) followed the scent of that krabby patty.  
Gir ran and ended up in the same room as Zim and Gir were stuck in.  
So, here's a little somethin' that will prevent confusion._  
_Gir (**with the krabby patty**) = Gir  
Gir (**with Amethyst**) = *Gir  
(A/N: Okay, now on with the story.)

_Amethyst and Kierra followed *Gir until they stopped at the same room.  
Was he who she thinks he was?_

**Amethyst. **Dad?

**Zim. **Dad? I don't have a smeet.... WHO ARE YOU?!

**Amethyst. **You don't remember me, dad? I'm Amethyst! I didn't know you were going to Irken Idol! What are you doing here? You shouldn't belong here! You should be in Irken Idol! Whatever the problem is, I'll help!

_An idea popped up in Zim's head._

**Zim. **Oh yes.... My daughter...Salty Mist

**Amethyst. **It's Amethyst

**Zim. **Amethyst...GOT IT!

**Kierra. **Uhh... Master? I have a feeling he's not your dad.

**Amethyst. **DO YOU DARE QUESTION MY JUDGEMENT? I know who my dad is.

**Zim. **Yeahh.. ehh... don't question her judgement...

**Amethyst. **So dad, what happened?

**Zim. **I...Uh...Got blamed for and was sent here to The Trial. But I need your help! Get me back to Irken Idol! I need to beat... THE DIB!

**Amethyst. **Dib's here??

**Zim. **Yes!! HE SNEAKED IN TO MY SHIP!

**Amethyst. **Okay! I'll help you!

_Amethyst held Zim's hand and Kierra's hand while Kierra held _Gir_'s hand and he held _*Gir_'s hand.  
Then Amethyst WENT INTANGIBLE, and made everybody else intangible, too, and she lead them THROUGH the wall! (Like Danny Phantom does it!)_

_Then, they all went behind a bush.  
Gir was sharing his krabby patty with *Gir._

**Gir. **I LIKE KRABBY PATTIES!

***Gir. **ME TOO!!

**Zim.** Wow! How did you do that?

**Amethyst. **I have powers, remember??

**Zim. **Oh... yeah I remember... I was just wondering if you knew how you did that....well you know.. cuz...yeah.. heheh...

_Amethyst just stares at him with suspicion. But she got over it and went with her plan._

**Amethyst. **Okay, so Kierra, run a scan through the building.

_Kierra does an AWESOME scan through the building._

**Kierra. **There's an air duct that leads to inside! Do you see that vent over there?

_Kierra points to the air vent on the wall of The Building.  
_

**Zim. **Yes?

**Kierra. **You go inside, then turn right. You'll end up in a janitorial closet..Go out of that and then go for auditions!

**Zim. **Okay! THANKS! You've been a great help, Sierra and Bessy.

**Kierra. **....It's Kierra...

**Amethyst. **...and Amethyst...

_Zim takes _Gir_ and they run towards the air vent._

**Kierra. **Master! How could you be so clueless?!

**Amethyst. **What do you mean?

**Kierra. **You just let Zim get away to Irken Idol!

**Amethyst. **He's my dad!

**Kierra. **He's an impostor! He fooled you! Didn't you notice that he didn't know you had powers?! He forgot my name! He forgot YOUR name TWO times! Bessy?! That wasn't even close to Amethyst! Right from the start, his face had words written over it, "IMPERSONATOR!!"

**Amethyst. **Oh yeah?! WHY DID HE LOOK JUST LIKE ZIM?!

**Kierra. **Haven't you ever thought that HE WAS FROM ANOTHER DIMENSION!

**Amethyst. **....So?! Why would this make you all mad?!

**Kierra. **Because that will give us a LESS chance to win! Irkens sing as good as Utopians!

**Amethyst. **........................................I'm a MIX! A mix of Irken and Utopian! I can sing twice as good as any Irken or Utopian!

**Kierra. **Well what if a REAL criminal fooled you, HUH?!

**Amethyst. **Well...okay.. I'm sorry. I should have listened to you in the first place.

**Kierra. **You do act more like your dad everyday.....whoaa.... it's like a clone!

**Amethyst. **Okay.. Kierra.. I get the point...

_Amethyst, Kierra, and _*Gir_ walk towards Fred to sign up. _

_

* * *

_Setting: Irken Idol Building  
_Meanwhile, Zim and Gir are crawling through the vent.  
They turn right and they go out of the air vent._

_It seems as though they were in a janitorial closet, just as Kierra said._

**Zim. **Those fools! HAHA! Come on, GIR!

**Gir. **OKAY!

_Zim finds his way through the halls. He went into a room where lots of people were sitting down on lots of chairs with numbers on the back of their shirts._

**Zim. **OH MAN! I forgot I have to wear..._(camera dramatically zooms up to Zim's face_)...A NUMBER! DUN DUN DUUN!

**Gir. **NUMBERS!! WHEEHOO!!

**Zim.** Shush Gir. We can't let anyone know we're here without a number! They'll think we sneaked in!

**Gir. **But we did!

**Zim. **Well we don't want anybody else to know that!

_Zim waits around the corner of a hall as he watches a Vortian and his robot walking past them to the vending machine to get some food._  
_He quietly rips the number off his shirt. They don't notice at all! _

**Zim. **Okay, let's see what my number is. "22,022." Okay...not bad. I'll put it on the back of my shirt and will look like I'm coming back from the bathroom. INNOCENT!!

**Gir. **What about me?!

**Zim.** Oh yeah...

_The Vortian comes back with his robot. Zim secretly takes the number off the robot's back.  
Zim was lucky that robot didn't notice, cuz Vortian robots are DANGEROUS! (Are they? I don't know but I do know that Vortians built the Massive!)_

**Zim. **Here.

**Gir. **YAY! MY NUMBER IS....22,022. We gots the same numbers!!

**Zim. **Of course. We're partners! Now let's be INNOCENT!

_Zim and Gir walk their innocent walk to a chair.  
_

**George Lopez. **Next. Number 22,021!

**Dib. **YES! THAT'S ME! Come on, BOB!

**Bob. **Okay..

_They walk into the room with the big stage._

**Zim. **Dib is here too?! Oh yeah.. I forgot he was even with us.

**Gir. **HI PRETTY LADY!

**Tak. **Oh no. It's YOU!

**Zim. **Tak!

**Tak. **Zim!

**Zim. **Tak!

**Tak. **ZIM!

**Zim. **..........TAK!

**Tak. **...........ZIM!

**Zim.** TAK?! YOU'RE SINGING?! WHY?!

**Tak. **THE DEATH MACHINE!!

**Zim. **OH YEAH?! I'LL GET IT FIRST!

**Tak. **ANYTHING YOU COULD DO, I COULD DO BETTER!

_Music is about to start but Mimi interrupts._

**MiMi. **Okay, guys! Let's not start a song! I'VE HAD IT with Tak singing songs to match the situation ALL DAY for no reason!

**Zim. **SHE CAN SPEAK?!

**Tak. **Of course she can!... I gave her voice.

**Gir. **Hi MIMI!

**Mimi. **Gir...

**Gir. **I LURVE YOUU!!

**Mimi. **....I..uhh.._(looks at Tak)_

**Tak. **Gir's like that. Ignore him.. and IGNORE THAT HIDEOUS CREATURE sitting right next to him, too.

_Gaz looks up at Tak. _

**Gaz. **ME?!

**Tak. **NO NOT YOU! ZIM!

**Zim. **PREPARE YOUR BLADDER FOR THE MOST HUMILIATING MOMENT OF YOUR LIFE ONCE I BLOW YOU OFF THE STAGE!!

**Tak. **THIS IS JUST FOR AUDITIONS!! You are not even a threat to me; you're a dried up bug on the windshield of my life.

**Zim. **Heh?!

**Tak. **I'm better than you and I'll get that death machine before you!

**Zim. **Yeah yeah yeah they ALL say that.

* * *

Setting: The Other Room  
_Meanwhile, in the other room with the judges..._

**Dib. **Hello. I am Dib. My SIR unit, Bob, and I would like to sing a song.

**Nicole. **Go right ahead!

**Danicka. **SING!

**Voldemort. **Yeah, do what Danicka says. Sing. But I won't care. You all suck!

**Nicole. **Hey! You shouldn't say that! He didn't even sing yet!

**Voldemort. **Nicole, we looked through.... hey kid whats your number?

**Dib. **Uhm...22,021?

**Voldemort. **We looked through 22,020 PEOPLE that can't even sing the alphabet and now you're telling me that I can't judge people? I AM A JUDGE! I HAVE TO JUDGE!

**Nicole. **But you don't have to be so critical about it..

**Danicka. **Yeah.. I mean some people made it in

**Voldemort. **Some people?? What about TWO? TWO PEOPLE!! Okay..uhh.. Dib.. SING!

**Dib. **Uhh....Can I talk to Bob for a minute?

**Danicka. **Talk to Bob? You're on auditions now. YOU HAVE TO SING!

**Dib. **Yeah... but we ...uhm..didn't pick...a song.. yet...

**Danicka, Voldemort, and Nicole. **Ohmygod...

_Dib and Bob turn around to talk to each other in private._

**Dib. **WE DIDN'T PICK A SONG YET!

**Bob. **I know! Why don't we sing..._(whispering becomes indistinct_)

_Then, Dib and Bob turn around._

**Dib. **Okay, we know what to sing now.

**Nicole. **Let me refresh your mind. Your ROBOTS are the lead singers, not you. So if you were playing to lead--

**Dib. **Don't worry, Nicole, Bob is leading.

**Danicka. **Finally, someone with a brain.

**Nicole. **Yeah, but too much of a big head.

Music Starts Playing  
**Bob. **I'm hot, you're cold  
You go around like you know  
Who I am, but you don't  
You've got me on my toes

**Dib and Bob. **I'm slippin' into the lava  
And I'm tryin' keep from goin' under  
Baby, who turned the temperature hotter?  
'Cause I'm burnin' up, burnin' up for you baby  
C'mon girl

**Bob. **I fell so fast  
Can't hold myself back  
High heels, red dress  
All by yourself, gotta catch my breath

**Dib and Bob. **I'm slippin' into the lava  
And I'm tryin' keep from goin' under  
Baby, who turned the temperature hotter?  
'Cause I'm burnin' up, burnin' up for you baby

**Bob. **Walk in the room all I can see is you  
Oh, you're starin' me down I know you feel it too

**Bob. **I'm slippin' into the lava  
And I'm tryin' keep from goin' under  
Baby, who turned the temperature hotter?  
'Cause I'm burnin' up, burnin' up for you baby

**Dib and Bob. **Slippin' into the lava  
And I'm tryin' keep from goin' under  
Baby, who turned the temperature hotter?  
'Cause I'm burnin' up, burnin' up for you baby

**Dib. **Yo, we're burnin' up in this place tonight  
Your Brothers sing it loud and we're feelin' right  
Get up and dance, don't try and fight it  
Big Dib is for real and that's no lie

**Dib. **Stop, drop and roll and touch your toes  
It keeps on burnin' up, more and more  
I got JB with me playin' it down  
Come on boys, let's bring the chorus around

**Bob and Dib. **I'm slippin' into the lava  
And I'm tryin' keep from goin' under  
Baby, who turned the temperature hotter?  
'Cause I'm burnin' up, burnin' up for you baby  
Burnin' up, burnin' up for you baby  
Music Ends  
_(The song was Burnin' Up by The Jonas Brothers.)_

**Nicole and Danicka. **Oh my god...That was...

**Voldemort. **Horrible! A piece of SH--(censored)

**Nicole. **Well I liked that sh--(censored)

**Danicka. **Yeah... Me too.

**Voldemort. **Oh please! You probably only liked it cuz they sang a Jonas Brothers song.

**Nicole. **Uhh... NO! I'm not a fan of them; I just like their songs.

**Danicka. **But, Dib and Bob were awesome!

**Nicole. **YEAHH!! YEAAAAAAAAH!

**Voldemort. **.....Are you serious? Look at that Dib! That shirt! It makes me feel sad!

**Danicka. **Oh have YOU looked in the mirror lately? YOUR FACE MAKES ME FEEL SAD!

**Nicole. **OOOH! BURNED!! hahaah

_Danicka and Nicole do High-Fives._

**Voldemort.** What? That wasn't even a diss.

**Danicka. **So?

**Voldemort. **OH PLEASE GOD SAVE ME!

_Nicole and Danicka completely ignore that._

**Nicole. **Congratulations, Bob and Dib!

**Danicka. **YOU'RE GOING TO HOLLYWOOD! Right? They have a Hollywood here?

**Nicole. **Uhh? I don't know? What does the paper say?

_Danicka pulls out an orange paper._

**Danicka. **It says that they have a "Wollywood." That's so...original. It also says that it's a different planet and the people who go to...Wollywood... have to take a spaceship there. Then they stay at the Kajolica Hotel.

**Voldemort. **Kajolica?

**Nicole. **Oh..okay... so... what do we do now?

**Danicka. **We give him the paper thing that says he could go to Wollywood! Here, Dib and Bob, your ticket... TO WOLLYWOOD!

**Nicole. **YOU GET TO LIVE AMONG THE STARS!! ahaha get it? cuz... we're in...space?

**Voldemort. **That's just sad.

**Danicka. **Seriously, Nicole, leave the puns to me.

**Voldemort. **Better yet, leave the puns to no one. Seriously.

_Dib and Bob go to Danicka to get the ticket._

**Dib. **YES! YES! YES! YES! YES!

**Nicole. **Okay, go back to the other room. Go left, and then you'll see a teleporter. You go in through that and then you'll be in a room with other people that can go to Wollywood, too. Stay there until further notice.

**Dib. **THANK YOU THANK YOU THANK YOU THANK YOU THANK YOU THANK YOU THANK YOU THANK YOU THANK YOU!!!!!!!!!!!!

_Dib ran out the room and ran to his right. He went through the teleporter. Then he came back to The Other Room._

**Dib. **That was a teleporter with falling fat guys.

**Danicka. **YOUR OTHER LEFT!

**Dib. **Okay...

_Dib AND BOB went to THEIR LEFT this time and they went into a room with other people who could make it to Wollywood.  


* * *

_Setting: THE ROOM!  
_There were around 18 people in the room._

**Dib. **Wow only 18 people out of 22,021 people? The judges are... strict.

**Bob. **And WE made it!

**Dib. **YEAH!

_

* * *

_

Setting: Irken Idol Building

**George Lopez. **NEXT! NUMBER 22,022.

**Zim. **THAT'S US! Let's go GIR!

**Gir. **YAYY I GONNA SING!! WHOOHOO!!

_Zim and Gir go in The Other Room._

**Ohmygod! Dib made it to Wollywood! What about Zim and Gir? WILL THEY MAKE IT?! What about TAK?! Will SHE make it?! HEH?! HEH????! Find out in the next chapter!!**

* * *

**I don't own Spongebob. I don't own the script to "The Trial." I own Fred. I don't own a Krabby Patty. I don't own Kierra and Amethyst. I don't own the original Invader Zim characters. I don't own Danny Phantom. Nicole is me; Danicka is my sister. I don't own the song Burnin' Up by the Jonas Brothers. We don't own Hollywood. I own Wollywood. I own Bob. I DO NOT own George Lopez. Ehh... wow less disclaimers! YAY! Yeah I know; I updated slow. R&R!! Criticism is accepted, no matter how much they might hurt me... on the inside ):  
REVIEW!! NOWW!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!OHMYGOD!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!EXCLAMATION POINTS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!  
**


	5. Headless Clown

**Rated T for censored swearing, explicit lyrics, and etc. Disclaimers at bottom. CHAPTER 5!  
**

**Irken Idol  
Chapter 5: Headless Clown  
**

Setting: THE OTHER ROOM!  
-Zim went in with Gir to the OTHER ROOM with the judges Nicole, Danicka, and Voldemort.

**Nicole. **Ahh yess another Zim for the BILLIONTH time. Tell me what dimension are you from?

**Zim. **I don't remember I'm pretty sure it has a cookie in it...

**Danicka. **Does the dimension of the word "luvahh" in it?

**Zim. **Sure? I don't remember!! But now that you mention, I think it did have luvahh in it..

**NICOLE. **HEY!! YOU'RE THE ORIGINAL ZIM I MADE!! YAY!!

**Danicka. **Wow Nicole I didn't really think he'd ever join Irken Idol... I guess I owe you five bucks..

**Zim. **WAIT!! You're COOKIE?!

**Nicole. **Yeahh I'm the one that practically made this whole story..

**Zim. **SO YOU MADE ME GET INVOLVED IN THAT SUMMER THEME SONG?? YOU'RE THE ONE THAT MADE DIB THE BANANA KING INSTEAD OF ME?? YOU'RE THE ONE THAT MADE ME EXPERIENCE GIR'S HORRIBLE SINGING WITH SPONGEBOB WHEN THEY WERE SINGING "THE BEST DAY EVER??" **YOU'RE THE ONE THAT GOT ME ARRESTED/ACCUSED AND ALMOST GOT ME TO TRIAL TODAY????!**

**Danicka. **YEP! THAT'S HER!

**Zim. **YOUUU!!!

-He gets closer to Nicole getting ready to attack.

**Nicole. **DON'T COME ANY CLOSER!!

**Zim. **AND WHY SHOULDN'T I?!

**Nicole. **Because ONE: IT FEELS REALLY WEIRD and TWO: YOU KILL ME NOW, I'LL NEVER LET YOU HAVE THE POSSIBILITY OF LETTING YOU WIN THAT DEATH MACHINE JUST BECAUSE YOU'RE MY VERSION OF ZIM!! .....Did I just say that out loud?

**Danicka. **NICOLE!! THIS IS IRKEN IDOL!! Just because he's your version doesn't mean you should let HIM win it!!

**Voldemort. **FROM NOW ON, ONLY DANICKA AND I will decide who gets to win.

**Danicka. **Yeah we can't trust you anymore, Nicole...

**Nicole. **NO!! THAT'S NOT WHAT I MEANT!! I--

**Danicka and Voldemort. **Yes IT WAS!

-While Danicka and Voldemort were gettin' all mad at Nicole, Zim secretly reaches for the "TICKET TO WOLLYWOOD" thing on their desks....

**Nicole. **ZIM!! YOU HAVE TO SING FIRST!!

-Danicka and Voldemort stop converging in on Nicole and looked at ZIM!

**Danicka. **YOU SHOULD GO TO TRIAL FOR TRYING TO STEAL THE THINGER!

**Nicole. **NO DON'T!!

**Voldemort. **WHY NOT?!

**Nicole. **I'M THE WRITER FOR THE STORY AND WHATEVER I SAY, GOES!!!

**Voldemort. **BUT YOU WERE--

**Nicole. **I WAS NOT GONNA-- uhh... I can't say it because then it'll ruin the story...

**Zim. **Then WILL I WIN OR NOT?! TELL MEE!!

**Nicole. **No, I WON'T!!! just sing!!

**Danicka. **Hahaa at least I know who's gonna win..

**Zim. **WHO?!?!

**Danicka. **I'M NOT TELLING YOU EITHERR!! Even if I did, I would never be able to write stories with my sister ever again.

**Voldemort. **How come I can't know it?

**Nicole. **Because you're the strict judge and you won't be as criticizing as you should be because then you'll know what happens at the end.

**Zim. **CAN I JUST START SINGING NOW?!

**Nicole, Danicka, and Voldemort. **GO AHEAD!!

**Zim. **Gir!! YOU KNOW WHAT TO DO!

-Gir instantly changes into 'ghetto' clothes. By ghetto, I mean gangsterr lol. Zim turns all gangsterr too.

Music Starts Playing  
[Chorus: 2x]  
-ZIM STARTS TO DANCE!! haha  
**Gir. **Soulja boy off in this hoe  
Watch me crank it  
Watch me roll  
Watch me crank dat soulja boy  
Then super man dat hoe  
Now watch me YOOOOOOO!  
**Zim. **(crank dat soulja boy)  
**Gir. **Now watch me YOOOOOOO!  
**Zim. **(crank dat soulja boy)  
**Gir. **Now watch me YOOOOOOO!  
**Zim. **(crank dat soulja boy)  
**Gir. **Now watch me YOOOOOOO!

[Verse 1:]  
**Gir. **Soulja boy off in this hoe  
Watch me lean and watch me rock  
Super man dat hoe  
Then watch me crank dat robocop  
Super fresh, now watch me jock  
Jocking on them haterz man  
When i do dat soulja boy  
I lean to the left and crank dat dance  
**Zim. **(now YOOOO)  
**GIR. **I'm jocking on yo bitch ass  
And if we get the fightin  
Then i'm cocking on your bitch  
You catch me at yo local party  
Yes i crank it everyday  
Haterz get mad cuz  
i got me some bathing apes

[Chorus: x2]  
**Gir. **Soulja boy off in this hoe  
Watch me crank it  
Watch me roll  
Watch me crank dat soulja boy  
Then super man dat hoe  
Now watch me YOOOOOOO!  
**Zim. **(crank dat soulja boy)  
**Gir. **Now watch me YOOOOOOO!  
**Zim. **(crank dat soulja boy)  
**Gir. **Now watch me YOOOOOOO!  
**Zim. **(crank dat soulja boy)  
**Gir. **Now watch me YOOOOOOO!

[Verse 2:]  
**Gir. **I'm bouncin on my toe  
Watch me super soak dat hoe  
I'ma pass it to arab  
Then he gon pass it to don loc (loc)  
Haterz wanna be me  
Soulja boy, i'm the man  
They be lookin at my neck  
Sayin its the rubberband man (man)  
Watch me do it (watch me do it)  
Dance (dance)  
Let get to it (let get to it)  
Nope, you can't do it like me  
Hoe, so don't do it like me  
Folk, i see you tryna do it like me  
Man that shit was ugly

[Chorus: x4]  
**Gir. **Soulja boy off in this hoe  
Watch me crank it  
Watch me roll  
Watch me crank dat soulja boy  
Then super man dat hoe  
Now watch me YOOOOOOO!  
**Zim. **(crank dat soulja boy)  
**Gir. **Now watch me YOOOOOOO!  
**Zim. **(crank dat soulja boy)  
**Gir. **Now watch me YOOOOOOO!  
**Zim. **(crank dat soulja boy)  
**Gir. **Now watch me YOOOOOOO!

[Hook:]  
**Gir. **Im to clean off in this hoe  
Watch me crank it  
Watch me roll  
Watch me crank that roosavelt  
And super soak that Hoe [x10]

**Gir. **Im to fresh up in this bitch  
Watch me shuffle  
Watch me jig  
Watch me crank my shoulder work  
Super man that bitch [x6]

[Chorus]  
**Gir. **Soulja boy off in this hoe  
Watch me crank it  
Watch me roll  
Watch me crank dat soulja boy  
Then super man dat hoe  
Now watch me YOOOOOOO!  
**Zim. **(crank dat soulja boy)  
**Gir. **Now watch me YOOOOOOO!  
**Zim. **(crank dat soulja boy)  
**Gir. **Now watch me YOOOOOOO!  
**Zim. **(crank dat soulja boy)  
**Gir. **Now watch me YOOOOOOO!  
MUSIC ENDS.  
_The song was Crank Dat Soulja Boy BY Soulja boy Tell 'Em.  
I know the dance moves!! hahaa  
NOTE: I don't feel that I should censor bad words in the lyrics.  
It's a song; they're not really saying it._

**Danicka. **You sang Soulja Boy?!

**Nicole.** YEAHH!! hahaa!! I think they were pretty good

**Danicka. **Uh-huh.

**Voldemort. **Wow uhh Zim's dancing was inhuman.

**Danicka. **Because's he's not human.

**Voldemort. **But other than that, Gir's rapping/singing/whatever it was WAS GREAT!! YOU'RE BOTH GOING TO WOLLYWOOD!!

**Zim and Gir. **YESS!!!!!!!!!!!!

**Danicka. **Now here are directions as to how to get to the other room where all the other winners went.

-She gives Zim and Gir the Wollywood ticket and the directions.  
-Zim and Gir leave in their ghetto clothes to go to the place with the people.

**Nicole. **Why did you write directions?

**Danicka. **Because I got tired explaining EVERYTHING TO EVERYBODY 22,021 TIMES!!

* * *

Setting: The ROOM with the people waiting in it (I'll call it the waiting room)  
**George Lopez. **NEXT! NUMBER 22,023.

-A random person stands up with his little robot thing and went for auditions.

**George Lopez. **22,024! 22,025! 22,125! 22,685! 22,982! _Sabes que, _I said a million numbers and I'm not even tired. I'm so awesome and cool, like that... _(crosses his arms like the "cool" people do it) _

_

* * *

_Setting: THE OTHER ROOM  
-Meanwhile, in the Other Room, Nicole, Danicka, and Voldemort were being really bored.

**Voldemort. **That was the saddest attempt yet.

**Nicole. **Wow ohmygod that... was horrible.

**Danicka. **What kind of name is TaZim?

**TaZim. **I just wanted to sing!!!

-TaZim runs outside and cries.

* * *

Setting: The Waiting Room  
**George Lopez. **Dude! WHAT HAPPENED?!

**TaZim. **(says to camera) What the f--(censored) there's nothing wrong about singing a song about PIE, NICOLE!! OH and what kind of name is DANICKA, DANICKA?! AND YOU! You can go f--(censored) yourself, VOLDEMORT!! _(holds up middle finger) _

**George Lopez. **These people get crazier and crazier every time!

_Note: I SUCK at insults so BARE with me._

-TaZim leaves without looking back.

**George Lopez. **NEXT!!

**Amethyst. **Come on, KIERRA!!

**Kierra. **YES!

-They both go into the other room.

* * *

Setting: The Other Room  
-Amethyst and Kierra walk in.

**Voldemort. **Before you sing, can you call everybody else in the Waiting Room to come in here..

**Amethyst. **oh.. uhm okay?

-She calls everybody in the room. Only EIGHT more partners were left including Amethyst and Kierra.

**Nicole. **That's all of them? Wow I can't believed we covered everybody in 11 minutes!!

**Danicka. **That's how fast we are

**Voldemort.** BEFORE YOU GUYS EVEN START TO SING, let me tell you somethin! BECAUSE I CAN NOT TOLERATE THIS ANY LONGER..!!

**Nicole. **You don't HAVE to tolerate it any longer...We're almost done...

**Danicka. **Yeahh

**Voldemort. **Just let me tell you all that you all suck at singing!! THAT'S RIGHT!! Not even HALF the people made it to Irken Idol and if you don't think you could sing good, LEAVE NOW! Because If I'M NOT SATISFIED, you're going to face the wrath of my dark magic that I would use on Harry Potter!!

-Everyone stares at him like he has no hair. No wait, he does have no hair!!

**Nicole. **Don't listen to him... he's just mad bored.

**Voldemort. **YOU'RE DAMN RIGHT I AM!!

**Danicka. **Oooh!! You said a BAD word!!

**Nicole. **"Damn" isn't that bad of a word actually.. It's just bad enough to get in trouble by your parents if you say it.

**Danicka. **Everyone's parents? Or just OURS?

**Nicole. **Look they're not that bad! They're only strict about saying words like "damn."

**Danicka. **and stupid.

**Nicole. **No we can say that now. They only said "stupid" was a bad word because we were young back then....

**Voldemort. **SHUT THE HELL UP!! Everyone--

**Danicka. **ANOTHER BAD WORD!!

**Voldemort. **SHUT UP!! Everyone.. sit behind the seats behind us. Whoever's next gets up!

-Everyone goes to the seats behind them.  
**-**Amethyst and Kierra ran up... all nervous because of the fact that Voldemort might use dark magic on them..

**Amethyst. **(to Kierra) WE CAN DO THIS!!...

Music Starts Playing  
**Kierra. **Don't lose your way  
With each passing day  
You've come so far  
Don't throw it away  
Live believing  
Dreams are for weaving  
Wonders are waiting to start  
Live your story  
Faith, hope & glory  
Hold to the truth in your heart

**Amethyst and Kierra. **If we hold on together  
I know our dreams will never die  
Dreams see us through to forever  
Where clouds roll by  
For you and I

**Kierra. **Souls in the wind  
Must learn how to bend  
Seek out a star  
Hold on to the end  
Valley, mountain  
There is a fountain  
Washes our tears all away  
Words are swaying  
Someone is praying  
Please let us come home to stay

**Amethyst and Kierra. **If we hold on together  
I know our dreams will never die  
Dreams see us through to forever  
Where clouds roll by  
For you and I

**Amethyst and Kierra. **When we are out there in the dark  
We'll dream about the sun  
In the dark we'll feel the light  
Warm our hearts, everyone

**Amethyst and Kierra. **If we hold on together  
I know our dreams will never die  
Dreams see us through to forever  
As high as souls can fly  
The clouds roll by  
For you and I  
Music ENDS.  
_Song is If We Hold On Together by Diana Ross  
_

**Voldemort. **That song was SO BORING! I never even heard of it!!

**Nicole. **I never heard of it either but it was... beautiful. :]

**Danicka. **GUYS GUYS! All it matters was if they SANG good.

**Voldemort. **I don't know about this....

**Amethyst and Kierra. **....

**Nicole. **LET'S GET TOGETHER IN A GROUP AND THINK REALLY HARD ABOUT THIS FOR DRAMATIC SUSPENSE!!

-Danicka, Nicole, and Voldemort go in a circle and talk quietly.

**Amethyst. **I hate dramatic suspense.

**Kierra. **I'm worried. They NEVER heard the song before!

**Amethyst. **Kierra!! Don't TALK like that! We WILL make it to Wollywood!!

**Kierra. **But Master, not a lot of people made it to Wollywood....

**Amethyst. **So if only NINE people made it. We're gonna make it, too.

-Meanwhile, the judges are still judging.

**Voldemort. **THEY'LL NEVER SURVIVE IN THIS!!

**Nicole. **What did you think?

**Voldemort. **They'll lose for sure. If they're the kind that sings songs that none of us know, they'll lose...

**Danicka. **Yeah uhm Nicole.. they're not the best....

**Nicole. **At what? Picking out songs? Doesn't it matter if they SANG good?

**Voldemort. **Maybe they sang good but did you look at Amethyst's clothes....

**Nicole and Danicka. **Well... (they look at each other like they're making SECOND thoughts)

**DRAMATIC SUSPENSE!! DUN DUN DUUUN!!**

-Nicole, Danicka, and Voldemort go back to their seats...

**Kierra. **Oh... I don't like the look on their faces....

**Amethyst. **STOP SAYING STUFF LIKE THAT!!

**Nicole. **Well... THAT WAS AWESOME!!

**Voldemort. **DON'T LISTEN TO HER!! She's the NICE ONE!!

**Danicka. **The song was uhh okayy but you guys sing good you're gonna make it...

**Voldemort. **And because I'm the mean one, I'll do some criticizing... AHEM!! _(clears throat)_  
_(in British accent) _Your song was boring. I hate the way you look. YOU !! Change your clothes some time!! All Irkens like you wear the same clothes!!

**Amethyst. **FIRST OF ALL I'M A MIX! A mix of Utopian AND Irken!! AND this is a UNIFORM!! WE--

**Nicole. **Save it, Amethyst. It's no use. He's mean. Don't take all his criticism seriously...

**Kierra. **All?

**Danicka. **Yeahh but you guys are good enough. I gotta say YOU'RE GONNA MAKE IT!!

**Nicole. **I agree

**Voldemort. **Horrible.

**Nicole. **Well that was TWO out of THREE positives so you DO make it!!

**Amethyst and Kierra. **YAYY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

-Danicka gives Amethyst the ticket thingy.  
-They run to the teleporter thing that brings them to the place with all the other people that are going to Wollywood. I am going to call that room the "The Awesome Room."

**Voldemort. **They sing a song we don't know and THEY make it out of a billion people?

**Danicka. **That was only more than 22,000 people...

**Nicole. **That's a hyperbole. It is a statement that is greatly exaggerated. For example--

**Danicka. **I know what that means, Smartypants!!

**Nicole. **It's been a while since anyone called me that.

**Voldemort. **Just be quiet!! Whenever you guys talk, you go off topic. Why do THEY get to make it? I mean, who sings that song?

**Nicole. **Diana Ross.

**Voldemort. **Yeah well lets KEEP it that way.

**Nicole. **I KNOW they're not the best. Everyone around them is just horrible.

**Voldemort. **Oh whatever.

**Nicole. **They were good enough to make it though. Hey!! You may never know that they might sing better later on.

**Danicka. **YEAH...so.. SO CHEESE OFF!!

**Nicole. **I like cheese

**Danicka. **Yeahh me too I like the one with the holes in them.

**Nicole. **I THINK.... that's government cheese.

**Voldemort. **(sounds really cranky) I THINK we should get the next person up to sing!!

**Danicka. **I THINK we need a break.. I'm tired. Let's go get something to eat..

**Nicole. **Okayy. EVERYBODY!! (everybody else in the room looks at Nicole) WE'RE GONNA HAVE A LUNCH--

**Danicka. **Snack--

**Nicole. **SNACK BREAK!! You guys do... whatever..

-Nicole, Danicka, and Voldemort walk away from their judging table to a snack stand that happened to be there and ate.  
-Everybody else started talking to each other.

**Tak. **Did you hear that?

**Mimi. **That they liked government cheese?

**Tak. **NO!! Something else!! We need to go for a good song!!

**Mimi. **But all it matters is HOW we sing!!

**Tak. **Yeahh but we get voted by everybody else in the universe and it would help if we picked a song a lot of people liked, and if we sang a song familiar to them, our chances to be champions are for suree.

**Mimi. **And what if they don't?

-Tak thought of a plan.

**Tak. **Follow me.

-Tak and Mimi walk to the table that the judges judge to see three cups of Coke.  
-Tak takes out a vial with translucent liquid in it. It's like the vials you see from Emporer's New School, except the liquid is translucent and not pink.

**Mimi. **What's that?

**Tak. **My EVIL plan!! HAHAHAA!!

**Mimi. **Okay?

-Tak opens the vial and pours some of the clear water-looking liquid in each cup of soda.  
-The soda reacts, causing it to turn GREEN!

**Mimi. **Is it supposed to turn green?

**Tak. **I don't really care, as long as they drink it. Come on!! They're coming!

-Tak and Mimi secretly walk back to their seats as Nicole, Danicka, and Voldemort come back with their snacks.

**Nicole. **I TOTALLY love nachos.

**Danicka. **You love LOTS of Mexican foods, considering the fact that you're Filipino. I just ate potato chips...

**Voldemort. **I didn't eat anything...

**Nicole. **YOU'RE A VAMPIRE?!

**Voldemort. **.....

**Danicka. **Uhh sorry, Voldemort, Nicole's pretty obsessed with Twilight right now...

**Nicole. **I'M READING THE SECOND BOOK: NEW MOON!

**Voldemort. **Uh... What's that?

-He points to the Coke which is now supposedly green.

**Danicka. **I think that's our soda...

**Nicole. **Eww!! Why is it green? Give me that...

-Nicole takes everyone's cups and throws them on the other side of the room...

**Danicka. **But Nicole!! What about my Coke? I'm thirsty!! I can't go through the day without--

**Nicole. **I'LL GET YOU MORE LATER! I can't have you drink green stuff!

**Tak. **(to Mimi) Oh damn it.

**Mimi. **What was your plan?

**Tak. **They drink the Coke and the potion was supposed to make them make us go to Wollywood or even possibly win Irken Idol.

**Mimi. **Well it would have worked if it didn't make soda turn green...

**Tak. **I guess it only stayed clear in water last time I checked...

**Mimi. **What about your hypnotizing thing?

**Tak. **Ohh I never thought of that...

**Mimi. **We're gonna make it anyway.

**Voldemort. **Uhh...Okay... Who's next?

**Tak. **Us.

-Tak and Mimi go up stage. Everyone watches them.  
-The shine appears in Tak's eyes as she tries to hypnotize the judges.

**Danicka. **Whoa! That was cool! Her eyes went shiny!

**Nicole. **Nice try, Tak, but you can't hypnotize us. We're too smart for you. Besides, it's my story anyways.

**Voldemort. **I'm a demon. I can't get hypnotized.

**Nicole. **Oh.. so you're not a vampire?

**Voldemort. **WHERE THE HELL DID YOU GET THAT IDEA?!

-Nicole begins to talk but then got interrupted--

**Voldemort. **If it's about Twilight, I don't wanna hear about it.

-Nicole kept quiet.

**Danicka. **What are you singing?

**Tak.** You'll see.

Music Starts Playing  
-Tak started dancing awesome moves.  
**Mimi. **Superstar  
Where you from, hows it going?  
I know you  
Gotta clue, what you're doing?  
You can play brand new to all the other chicks out here  
But I know what you are, what you are, baby

**Mimi. **Look at you  
Gettin more than just re-up  
Baby, you  
Got all the puppets with their strings up  
Fakin like a good one, but I call 'em like I see 'em  
I know what you are, what you are, baby

-Mimi starts dancing, too.  
**Mimi and Tak. **Womanizer, Woman, Womanizer  
You're a Womanizer, oh Womanizer oh  
You're a Womanizer, baby  
You you you are, You you you are  
Womanizer, Womanizer, Womanizer (**Tak. **Womanizer)

**Mimi and Tak. **Boy, don't try to front  
I know just what you are  
Boy, don't try to front  
I know just what you are  
You got me goin'  
You're oh so charmin'  
But I can do it  
Womanizer

**Mimi and Tak. **Boy, don't try to front  
I know just what you are  
Boy, don't try to front  
I know just what you are  
You say i'm crazy  
I got your crazy  
You're nothin' but a  
Womanizer

**Mimi. **Daddy-O  
You got the swagger of champion  
Too bad for you  
You just cant find the right companion  
I guess when you have one too many, makes it hard  
It could be easy, who you are  
Thats who you are, baby

**Mimi. **Lollipop  
Must mistake me, you're a sucker  
To think that I  
Would be a victim not another  
Say it, play it how you wanna  
But no way Im ever gonna fall for you, never you, baby

-At this point, you see Nicole and Danicka dancing and moving along to the beat of the song. Idiots.

**Mimi and Tak. **Womanizer, Woman, Womanizer  
You're a Womanizer, oh Womanizer oh  
You're a Womanizer, baby  
You you you are, You you you are  
Womanizer, Womanizer, Womanizer  
(Womanizer)

**Mimi and Tak. **Boy, don't try to front  
I know just what you are  
Boy, don't try to front  
I know just what you are  
You got me goin'  
You're oh so charmin'  
But I can do it  
Womanizer

**Mimi and Tak. **Boy, don't try to front  
I know just what you are  
Boy, don't try to front  
I know just what you are  
You say i'm crazy  
I got your crazy  
You're nothin' but a  
Womanizer

**Mimi. **Maybe if we both lived in a different world  
(**Tak. **Womanizer, Womanizer, Womanizer, Womanizer)  
**Mimi. **It would be all good, and maybe I could be your girl, but I can't cause we don't

**Mimi and Tak. **Womanizer, Woman, Womanizer  
You're a Womanizer, oh Womanizer oh  
You're a Womanizer, baby  
You you you are, you you you are  
Womanizer, Womanizer, Womanizer  
(Womanizer)

**Mimi and Tak. **Boy, don't try to front  
I know just what you are  
Boy, don't try to front  
I know just what you are  
You got me goin'  
You're oh so charmin'  
But I can do it  
Womanizer

**Mimi and Tak. **Boy, don't try to front  
I know just what you are  
Boy, don't try to front  
I know just what you are  
You say i'm crazy  
I got your crazy  
You're nothin' but a  
Womanizer

**Mimi and Tak. **Boy, don't try to front  
I know just what you are  
Boy, don't try to front  
I know just what you are  
Womanizer, Woman, Womanizer  
You're a Womanizer  
Oh Womanizer oh  
You're a Womanizer, baby  
Music Ends.  
_Song is Womanizer by Britney Spears._

**George Lopez. **Oh hot DAMN it's BRITNEY SPEARS!!

**Nicole. **Where did you come from?

**George Lopez. **"Where did I come from?" Está loca I WORK HERE!!

**Nicole. **Ohh...

**Danicka. **haha!! He spoke Spanish on youu!!

**Nicole. **Shut up.

**Voldemort. **Unlike YOU TWO, I will judge. The singing was good. Your song choice was ok. At least I heard of it. Your dancing was enjoyable.

**Nicole. **YOU GUYS WERE AWESOME!

**Danicka. **I liked the fact that you picked a song from Britney Spears.

**Voldemort. **You guys started dancing like idiots.

**Nicole. **I guess that's THREE out of three! You're going to Wollywood!!

**Tak. **I thought so :]

-Tak got the ticket thing, and she and Mimi went to the Awesome Room. **The Awesome Room** is where all the people are staying when they're allowed to go to Wollywood.

**Voldemort. **Only SIX more to go. Next!

-Skoodge comes up with his SIR unit.

**Nicole. **Skoodge, and what is your SIR unit's name?

**Skoodge. **His name is George Clooney!

**Danicka. **George Clooney? AHAHA!! AHAHAHAAA....

**Nicole. **I don't get it. What's funny?

**Danicka. **Nothing... just... just sing...

Music Starts Playing  
**Skoodge. **Hey girl,  
You know our economy's in the toilet  
But Im still going to treat you right

**George Clooney. **I said you can have whatever you like (**Skoodge. **if you like)  
I said you can have whatever you like (**Skoodge. **if you like) yeah, yeah

**George Clooney. **Tater tots, Cold Duck on ice  
And we can clip coupons all night  
And baby you can have whatever you like (**Skoodge. **if you like)  
I said you can have whatever you like (**Skoodge. **if you like) yeah, yeah

**George Clooney. **Take you out for dinner, anywhere that you please  
Like Burger King or Mickey Ds  
And baby you can have whatever you like (**Skoodge. **if you like)  
I said you can even have the large fries (**Skoodge. **large fries) yeah, yeah

**George Clooney. **Baby, you should know I am really quite a sweet guy  
When I buy you bathroom tissue I always get the two-ply  
Want it, you can get it, my dear  
I got my Costco membership card right here, yeah

**George Clooney. **You like Top Ramen, need Top Ramen  
Got a cupboard full of 'em, Ill keep 'em coming  
You want it, I got it, go get it, just heat it  
Dump the flavor packet on it and eat it

**George Clooney. **Pork and beans and Minute Rice  
And we can play Cribbage all night  
And baby you can have whatever you like (**Skoodge. **if you like)  
I said you can have whatever you like (**Skoodge. **if you like) yeah, yeah

**George Clooney. **I can take you to the laundromat downtown  
And watch all the clothes go round and round  
And baby we can go wherever you like (**Skoodge. **if you like)  
I said we can go wherever you like (**Skoodge. **if you like) yeah, yeah

**George Clooney. **Hottest shorty I know, if you had some lipo  
You could be second-runner-up Miss Ohio  
Seven dollar bills rolled  
Up inside my plastic billfold  
Buy you a bagel even if it isnt day old  
And you never ever gotta wear your sisters old clothes  
As long as Im still assistant manager at Kinkos  
Cut your hair with scissors and a soup bowl  
You aint got to pay me, thats the way that I roll

**George Clooney. **My chick can have want she want  
At Wal-mart she can pick out anything she want  
I know girl you aint never had a man like that  
Who doesnt make you buy generic brand like that, Yeah

**George Clooney. **You like my Hyundai, see my Hyundai  
I can take you to see your cousin Phil next Sunday  
But thats kind of far and Im not made of cash  
Do you think you could chip in for gas?  
Mac and Cheese would be all right  
But lets send out for pizza tonight  
And you can order any toppings you like (**Skoodge. **if you like)  
I said you can even have the last slice (**Skoodge. **the last slice) yeah, yeah

**George Clooney. **Ran myself a cable from my neighbor next do'  
Now I can get free HBO  
And baby you can watch whatever you like (**Skoodge. **if you like)  
I said you can watch whatever you like (**Skoodge. **if you like) yeah

**George Clooney. **And you can always ride the city bus  
Got a stack of tokens just for us  
Yo, my wallets fat and full of ones  
Its all about the Washingtons, thats right

**George Clooney. **You want White Castle, need White Castle  
Long as you got me it wont be no hassle  
You want it, well get it, just dont be a hater  
If I grab a bunch of napkins for later

**George Clooney. **Thrift store jeans on sale half-price  
The underwear at Goodwill is nice  
And baby you can have whatever you like (**Skoodge. **if you like)  
I said you can have whatever you like (**Skoodge. **if you like) yeah, yeah

**George Clooney. **Baby, I can give you anything you please  
Even share my government cheese  
And baby you can have as much as you like (**Skoodge. **if you like)  
I said you can have as much as you like (**Skoodge. **if you like) yeah, yeah  
Music ENDS.  
_Song is Whatever You Like by Weird Al Yankovic._

**Nicole. **(laughs) Is that T.I. ?

**Danicka. **No, it's the funny version of the song by the same dude who made the eBay song.

**Nicole. **Well whatever it was, THAT WAS AWESOME!

**Danicka. **You guys sang good, especially you, George Clooney.

**Voldemort. **Why did you name your robot after a human celebrity? The song was stupid. You guys sang great though.

**Nicole. **No, I think the song was just funnier.

**Danicka. **Yeahh, lighten up a little, Voldemort.

**Voldemort. **No.

**Nicole. **He's a demon _(right?) _so there's nothing you can really do about that.... I say YOU MAKE IT TO WOLLYWOOD!

**Danicka. **Yep!!

**Voldemort. **No.

**Nicole. **TWO OUT OF THREE!! Yeah!!

**Skoodge and ****George Clooney.** Yeahh!!

-They run to the teleporter that brings them to the Awesome Room.

**Voldemort. **I have a feeling everybody else in this room is gonna make it because 1.) we need more people to go to Wollywood and 2.) you're too lazy to criticize anymore people.

**Nicole. **Yeah... you can say that.. Who's next? WAIT! Don't tell me! SAM IS NEXT!

**Sam. **YEP!! With my buddy, PETER GRIFFIN!!

**Peter Griffin. **Yay!! What are we singing?

**Sam. **I HAVE NO IDEA!!

**Peter Griffin. **Oh... okayy...

-Sam and Peter Griffin come to stage.

**Peter Griffin. **(whispers to Sam) Hey, I know what to sing! Just follow me...

**Sam. **Uhh okay. :]

Music Starts Playing  
**Peter Griffin.** I see your dirty face  
High behind your collar  
What is done in vain  
Truth is hard to swallow  
So you pray to God  
To justify the way you live a lie, live a lie, live a lie  
And you take your time  
And you do your crime  
Well you made your bed  
I'm in mine

**Sam and Peter Griffin. **Because when I arrive  
I bring the fire  
Make you come alive  
I can take you higher  
What is this, forgot?  
I must now remind you  
Let It Rock  
Let It Rock  
Let It Rock

**Peter Griffin.** Now the son's disgraced  
He, who knew his father  
When he cursed his name  
Turned, and chased the dollar  
But it broke his heart  
So he stuck his middle finger  
To the world  
To the world  
To the world  
And you take your time  
And you stand in line  
Well you'll get what's yours  
I got mine

**Sam and Peter Griffin. **Because when I arrive  
I bring the fire  
Make you come alive  
I can take you higher  
What is this, forgot?  
I must now remind you  
Let It Rock  
Let It Rock  
Let It Rock

**Sam. **Yeah!  
Griffin's world  
Planet Rock  
Panties drop  
And the tops  
And she gunna rock 'til the cameras stop  
And I sing about angels like Angela (rock)  
And Pamela (rock)  
And Samanda (rock)  
And Amanda (rock)  
And Tamara (rock)  
Ménage à trois  
Im  
in here like bitch what's up  
Mechanic, me, I can fix you up  
I can Dick you up  
I can Dick you down  
Shorty we can go wherever just pick a town  
And the jewelry is louder than an engine sound  
Big ass rocks like on the ground  
Dirty like sex that's off the ground  
Weezy

**Sam and Peter Griffin. **Because when I arrive  
I bring the fire  
Make you come alive  
I can take you higher  
What is this, forgot?  
I must now remind you  
Let It Rock  
Let It Rock  
Let It Rock

**Sam and Peter Griffin. **Because when I arrive  
I bring the fire  
Make you come alive  
I can take you higher  
What is this, forgot?  
I must now remind you  
Let It Rock  
Let It Rock  
Let It Rock

**Sam and Peter Griffin. **Just Let It Rock  
Let It Rock  
Let It Rock  
Let It Rock  
Let It Rock

**Sam. **I'm back like I forgot somethin'  
I'm somethin'  
Rulin' Rock rubbin' rap runnin'  
Miles like I'm trying to get a flat stomach  
Like Wayne the personal trainer  
My aim is perfect I'll bang ya  
Period, like the remainda

**Peter Griffin.** I wish I could be  
As cool as you  
And I wish I could say  
The things you do  
But I can't and I won't live a lie  
No not this time (echo)  
Music ENDS.  
_Song is Let it Rock by Kevin Rudolph FEATURING Kanye West_

**Nicole. **THAT WAS AWESOME!

**Danicka. **You always say that. Yes, I thought it was awesome. I LOVE that song!

**Nicole. **Yeahh me too!

**Voldemort. **I thought it was crappy, stupid--

**Nicole. **Face it. The song TURNED YUHH ON!

**Voldemort. **Shut up.

**Nicole. **I hate you.

**Voldemort. **(smiles) Good! I don't care anyway!

**Nicole. **(grimaces)

**Voldemort. **But your clothes are horrible. Where do you shop from? The garbage? Your singing was horrible, too. It made me wanna do suicidal...

-Sam runs to Voldemort to try and kill him but Peter Griffin holds her back.

**Voldemort. **But since it's ALWAYS two out of three, you're gonna make it.

**Sam and Peter Griffin. **YAY!!!!

-Sam and Peter got the ticket thing and ran to the Awesome Room through the teleporter.

**Voldemort. **NEXT!

**Aneera. **Don't worry! I'll sing GREAT!

**Leela. **Yep! I'm her buddy!!

**Voldemort. **I know I know just cut to the chase.

-Tallest Purple barges in.

**Tallest Purple!! **Hey! I just wanted to see how the process is going. I see there are four more partners left!

**Nicole. **Yep!! Hey, was there ever a Tallest Pink?

**Tallest Purple.** Not that I heard of. Why?

**Nicole. **Because I like that color...

**Danicka. **Yeah! And what about a Tallest Green?

**Tallest Purple. **Yeah! There was a Tallest Green!! But he was the worst ruler ever; he killed half the Irkens because he was drunk one night.

**Danicka. **....Really?

**Purple. **OF COURSE NOT! Haha!! But I'm sorry, there was no Tallest Green.

**Danicka. **Aww man.

**Purple. **Ok go on with your singing... uhm...

**Aneera. **Aneera and Leela.

**Purple. **Yeah! I'll go back to my snacks!

-Purple runs away to the dark doom of DOOMNESS!

**Voldemort. **Okay sing.

Music Starts Playing  
**Leela. **My hands are searching for you  
My arms are outstretched towards you  
I feel you on my fingertips  
My tongue dances behind my lips for you

**Leela. **This fire rising through my being  
Burning I'm not used to seeing you

**Leela. **I'm alive, I'm alive

**Leela and Aneera. **I can feel you all around me  
Thickening the air I'm breathing  
Holding on to what I'm feeling  
Savoring this heart that's healing

**Leela. **My hands float up above me  
And you whisper you love me  
And I begin to fade  
Into our secret place

**Leela. **The music makes me sway  
The angels singing say we are alone with you  
I am alone and they are too with you

**Leela. **I'm alive, I'm alive

**Leela and Aneera. **I can feel you all around me  
Thickening the air I'm breathing  
Holding on to what I'm feeling  
Savoring this heart that's healing

**Aneera. **And so I cry  
The light is white  
And I see you

**Leela. **I'm alive, I'm alive, I'm alive

**Aneera and Leela. **I can feel you all around me  
Thickening the air I'm breathing  
Holding on to what I'm feeling  
Savoring this heart that's healing

**Aneera and Leela. **Take my hand  
I give it to you  
Now you own me  
All I am  
You said you would never leave me  
I believed you  
I believe

**Aneera and Leela. **I can feel you all around me  
Thickening the air I'm breathing  
Holding on to what I'm feeling  
Savoring this heart that's healed  
Music ENDS.  
_Song is All Around Me by Flyleaf. _

**Nicole. **I used to like that song. THAT WAS AWESOME :]

**Danicka. **Okay I normally wouldn't say this, but I hated it. The song just.... it just makes me get crazy.

**Nicole. **Why?

**Danicka. **The way the person sings it, no matter who it is. It just makes me mad.

**Nicole. **But I think they sang pretty good.

**Voldemort. **Your song choice was unexpected. That you would pick a crappy song like all the others. This is even crappier.

**Aneera. **Huh?

**Voldemort. **You look HORRIBLE! There's one thing I know about Irkens and it's that girls have CURLED antennae. Either you're genetically mutated, or you're gay.

**Aneera. **What?! (gets pissed)

**Voldemort. **And your SINGING... was........ STUPID!

-Aneera gets so mad that she turns into a dragon and starts attacking him.  
-Voldemort attacks back with a magical wand.

**Nicole. **FIGHT FIGHT FIGHT FIGHT FIGHT FIGHT FIGHT!!

**Danicka. **Aneera or Voldemort?

**Nicole. **Voldemort.

**Danicka. **Why?

**Nicole. **CUZ HE GOTS A STICK!

**Danicka. **I say... 20 bucks. So when Aneera wins, I get all my money back that we wagered in all today.

**Nicole. **You're on!

-They shake hands.  
-Aneera and Voldemort are still fighting. Nicole and Danicka, and everybody else in the room, stare as they fight. The fight isn't pretty.

**Voldemort. **EXPELLIARMUS! _(I think I spelled that wrong.)_

**-**Aneera falls on her back caused by the blow of the magic.

**Leela. **STOP! We should make peace in the world!

**Feather. **YEAH!! YOU GUYS SHOULD STOP!! If you don't, then YOU WILL ALL FACE THE WRATH OF MY ALMIGHTY BINDER!!

**Vir. **MUAHAHAHAAA!!

**Voldemort. **You still won't make it.

**Aneera. **I hate you..

**Nicole. **You're not the only one.

-Tallest Purple comes in the room again.

**Purple. **Hey!! You should let her in!!

**Danicka. **Why?!

**Purple. **Because I LOVE that song, and SINCE I'M TALLEST, I get to make her get in!!

**Aneera. **Yay!! Come on, Leela!!

-Danicka gives them the ticket thing and they run to the Awesome Room.

**Voldemort. **Why did you do that?

**Purple. **Because I'm TALL! (smirks)

**Danicka. **This isn't fair!

**Purple. **Well whatever.

-He goes back in.

**Nicole. **I guess Aneera was lucky!

**Voldemort. **That really wasn't fair.

**Danicka. **Wait! So who won the fight?

**Voldemort. **Why do you care?

**Danicka. **BECAUSE I BETTED 20 BUCKS ON ANEERA!

**Nicole. **and I betted on you.

**Voldemort. **Well ANEERA won!

**Danicka. **Yay!!

-She takes the money from Nicole.

**Nicole. **You only said that so I would lose all my money.

**Voldemort. **Yes, I know.

**Danicka. **Next!

**Feather. **YAY!! THAT'S ME!

**Vir. **and me!! I'm the lead singer!!

**Nicole. **Okay.

Music Starts Playing  
**Vir. **We are what we're supposed to be  
Illusions of your fantasy  
All dots and lines that speak and say  
What we do is what you wish to do

**Vir. **We are the cartoon symphony  
We do the things you wanna see  
Frame by frame, to the extreme

**Vir. **Our friends are so unreasonable  
They do the unpredictable  
All dots and lines that speak and say  
What we do is what you wish to do

**Vir. **It's all an orchestra of strings,  
Doing unbelievable things  
Frame by frame, to the extreme  
One by one, we're making it fun

**Vir and Feather. **We are the Cartoon Heroes, oh oh oh  
We are the ones who're gonna last forever  
We came out of our crazy mind, oh oh oh  
And what a town and a feza, baby

**Feather. **Take a Spiderman, an arachnophobian  
Welcome to the toon town party  
Take a superman from never never land  
Welcome to the toon town party

**Vir. **We learn to run at speed of light  
And to fall down from many heights  
It's true but just remember that  
What we do is what you just can to

**Vir. **I know the route of crazyness  
A bunch of dots that's chasin' us  
Frame by frame, to the extreme  
One by one, we're making it fun

**Vir and Feather. **We are the Cartoon Heroes, oh oh oh  
We are the ones who're gonna last forever  
We came out of our crazy mind, oh oh oh  
And what a town and a feza, baby

**Feather. **Take a Spiderman, an arachnophobian  
Welcome to the toon town party  
Take a superman from never never land  
Welcome to the toon town party

**Vir. **You'll think we're so mysterious  
Don't take us all too serious  
Be original, and remember that  
What we do is what you just can do

**Feather. **What we do is what you just can do (x4)

**Vir and Feather. **We are the Cartoon Heroes, oh oh oh  
We are the ones who're gonna last forever  
We came out of our crazy mind, oh oh oh  
And what a town and a feza, baby

**Feather. **There's still more to come  
And everyone will be  
Welcomed at the  
Toon, toon  
Town, town  
Party  
Music ENDS.  
_Song is Cartoon Heroes by Aqua.  
(A/N: I HOPE THIS SONG BURNED YOU, EXPLODYTHING!)_

**Nicole. **THAT WAS AWESOME! I heard that on DDR!

**Danicka. **Yeah I know, Nicole. You think that song is awesome. You sang it all day to me once.

**Nicole. **Haha yes... I know!

**Danicka. **I like how the song is all danceable.

**Voldemort. **The song BURNED me.

**Nicole. **So does Harry Potter!

**Voldemort. **Your singing was uhh okay. I like your hair.

**Feather. **Uhh.. thanks?

**Nicole. **(whispers to Danicka) This is.. weird.

**Danicka. **So uhm... you're not Irken. Not like most of everybody else that went for Irken Idol.

**Feather. **Actually, I only turn into it when I... the horrible thing happens.

**Danicka. **What horrible thing?

**Feather. **I CAN'T TELL YOU! VIR!!

**Vir. **Yes, Master!

-Vir turns into a BINDER, steals the ticket thing, and runs with Feather to the Awesome Room.

**Danicka. **How can "it" steal the ticket thing? He's a binder!

**Nicole. **It's a robot DISGUISED as a binder!

**Danicka. **Wow haha!! But they just ran away. Shouldn't we do anything about it?

**Nicole. **Nahh.. they made it anyway. NEXT!

**Natalie. **YAY!!

**Bob. **OKAY!! Do YOU know what to sing?

**Natalie. **YEP!! Do YOU?

**Bob. **YEAHH!!

Music Starts Playing  
**BOB. **Do you like waffles

**Natalie. **Yeah we like waffles

**BOB. **Do you like pancakes

**Natalie. **Yeah we like pancakes

**BOB. **Do you like french toast

**Natalie. **Yeah we like french toast

**Natalie and BOB. **Dodododo can't wait to get a mouth full waffles waffles waffles dodododo can't wait to get a mouth full

**BOB. **Do you like waffles

**Natalie. **Yeah we like waffles

**BOB. **Do you like pancakes

**Natalie. **Yeah we like pancakes

**BOB. **Do you like french toast

**Natalie. **Yeah we like french toast

**Natalie and BOB. **Dodododo can't wait to get a mouth full  
Music ENDS.  
_Song is Do You Like Waffles? by Parry Gripp. _

**Nicole. **THAT WAS AWESOME!

**Danicka. **Ah yes, a classic song we all love.

**Voldemort. **I strangely liked the song. But you're lucky I liked waffles.

**Natalie. **YAY!

**Voldemort. **I don't care about clothes. It's useless anyway. Your singing was good.

**Danicka. **I guess you made it.

**Bob. **YAY!

**Nicole. **ONE MORE PERSON LEFT, and I'm FINALLY done with this chapter! Did you know I wrote a whole story while writing this? I was even thinking about writing a new one today!

**Danicka. **Which one? The gay one?

**Nicole. **No no that's the one I finished. I'm talking about the racism one.

**Danicka. **Oh that one. But how's THAT gonna be a story? I thought that was just gonna be a song fanfic.

**Nicole. **The only song fanfic I'll ever write was that Phineas and Ferb Summer Theme Song. I wanna make a story!

**Danicka. **Whatever.

**Nicole. **So there you have it!! There's a GAY story that I made and a RACISM story that I'm about to make! Guess what? They both have MORALS in it!!

**Danicka. **Here's a fun fact to all the readers. The GAY story is like 3 stories away from this one and the RACISM story is like after the gay one. Nicole, don't you think it would have been smart to start writing the stories for the ones after THIS one?

**Nicole. **Uhh... when I have an idea, I don't wanna lose it so I just type it, therefore, one of the reasons as to why it took forever to make this chapter.

**Natalie. **Can we just take the ticket now?

**Danicka. **Sure...

-They take the ticket and run away.

**Jessie McCartney. **I guess I'm next.

**Voldemort. **Oh my it's teen pop sensation JESSIE MCCARTNEY!

**Jessie McCartney.** Yep, and my buddy here is...

**Jesse. **JESSE! My name is JESSE!

**Nicole. **haha Jessie and Jesse. Okay sing your song.

**Jessie McCartney.** This is a favorite.

**Danicka. **Oh I love favorites!

**Nicole. **ME TOO!

Music Starts Playing  
**Jesse. **Its been so long (long, long)  
That I havent seen your face  
Im tryin be stong (strong)  
But the strenghth I have is washing away (way)  
It wont be long (long)  
Before I get you by my side  
And just hold you, tease you, sqeeze you  
Tell you whats been on my mind

**Jessie McCartney and Jesse.** I wanna make up right now (na na)  
I wanna make up right now (na na)  
Wish we never broke up right now (na na)  
We need to live up right now (na na)  
I wanna make up right now (na na)  
I wanna make up right now (na na)  
Wish we never broke up right now (na na)  
We need to live up right now (na na)

**Jesse. **Girl I know (know, know)  
Mistakes were made between us two  
And we show (show)  
Our acts that night, even said some things werent true.  
Why'd you go? (go)  
I havent seen my girl since then (then)  
Why cant it be that way it was?  
Cause you were my homie, lover, and friend

**Jessie McCartney and Jesse.** I wanna make up right now (na na)  
I wanna make up right now (na na)  
Wish we never broke up right now (na na)  
We need to live up right now (na na)  
I wanna make up right now (na na)  
I wanna make up right now (na na)  
Wish we never broke up right now (na na)  
We need to live up right now (na na)

**Jesse. **I cant lie (**Jessie McCartney.** I miss you much)  
Watching everyday that goes by (**Jessie McCartney.** I miss you much)  
Until I get you back im gonna try (**Jessie McCartney.** yes, I miss you much)  
Cuase you are the apple of my eye (**Jessie McCartney.** girl, I miss you much, I miss you much)  
I cant lie (**Jessie McCartney.** I miss you much)  
Watching everyday that goes by (**Jessie McCartney.** I miss you much)  
Until I get you back im gonna try (**Jessie McCartney.** yes, I miss you much)  
Cause you are the apple of my eye (**Jessie McCartney.** girl, I miss you much, I miss you much)

**Jessie McCartney and Jesse.** I wanna make up right now (na na)  
I wanna make up right now (na na)  
Wish we never broke up right now (na na)  
We need to live up right now (na na)  
I wanna make up right now (na na)  
I wanna make up right now (na na)  
Wish we never broke up right now (na na)  
We need to live up right now (na na)

**Jesse. **I want you to fly with me (want you to fly)  
I miss how you lie with me (miss how you lie)  
Just wish you could dine with me (wish you could dine with me)  
The one that'll grind with me (said, that that'll grind with me)  
I want you to fly with me (want you to fly)  
I miss how you lie with me (Oh, miss how you lie)  
Just wish you could dine with me (wish you could dine)  
The one that'll grind with me (Oh, one that'll grind)  
Yeah!

**Jessie McCartney and Jesse.** I wanna make up right now (na na)  
I wanna make up right now (na na)  
(**Jessie. **make up) (**Jessie. **Ohh)  
Wish we never broke up right now (na na)  
We need to live up right now (na na) (live up, babyy)  
I wanna make up right now (na na)  
I wanna make up right now (na na)  
Wish we never broke up right now (na na)  
We need to live up right now (na na) (make up)  
Music ENDS.  
_Song was Right Now (Na Na Na) by Akon._

**Nicole. **That was AWESOME!

**Danicka. **Nicole loves that song. I do too. :]

**Voldemort. **Yeah I like it.... AHH forget this you're going to Wollywood.

-He gives her the ticket.  
-Jessie and Jesse run to the Awesome Room.

**Nicole. **What was all that about?

**Voldemort. **What's the use of criticizing if they're gonna make it anyway?

**Danicka. **Yeahh... you're right. So how are you going to end this chapter?

**Nicole. **I always end it with a bunch of stupid disclaimers of which if I don't list them, my story gets deleted.

**Danicka. **Yeah, like what happened to Hurricane Zim.

**Nicole. **Actually, I changed the last chapter of it COMPLETELY!

**Danicka. **Yeah I know you put David Hasselhoff in it. He saved their life.

**Voldemort. **Okay so what now?

**Nicole. **I don't know. Oh I got an idea!! (takes out a notebook and starts writing in it)

**Danicka. **Nicole, what are you doing? You don't even write your stories in a notebook. That doesn't make sense.

**Nicole. **Nothing I ever do makes sense. Especially not this ending. (keeps writing)

-A Headless Clown comes out of nowhere, picks up Danicka, and runs away.

**Headless Clown. **Muahahahaa!!

**Danicka. **YOU'LL NEVER GET AWAY WITH THIS!!

**Nicole. **Oh I say I have gotten away with it pretty nicely. (smirks)

**Voldemort. **There's nothing to do but go to the Awesome Room and to take them on a rocketship that leads them to Planet Wollywood.

**Nicole. **Yep! Let's go!

-She and Voldemort walk away.

**Nicole. **I know who will win. (smiles)

**Voldemort. **Who?

**Nicole. **IT'S--

**MUAHAHA!! YOU'LL NEVER KNOW WHO WILL WIN! SUSPENSE ! SUSPENSE! SUSPEENNNSSSEE!!  
CHAPTER 5 ENDS!! REVIEW! Criticism accepted. No, don't call me unfair if Voldemort criticizes you. He's supposed to be mean.**  
**Haha.. The First Round is gonna be a stupid and twisted round. :]  
(Oh and sorry for the George Lopez fans if I suck at making an impression of him. I'm not George Lopez!)**

**Oh by the way, this was the longest chapter I've ever made SO FAR! This one had 11,465 words, including the disclaimers and this sentence and stuff!  
**

* * *

**Disclaimers. I do not own George Lopez. I do not own Voldemort. I am Nicole. My sister is Danicka. I do not own Amethyst and Kierra. I do not own Harry Potter. I do not own Soulja Boy Tell 'Em or Crank Dat Soulja Boy. I do not own the song If We Hold On Together by Diana Ross. I don't own Family Guy. I don't own Coke. I don't own Emporer's New School. I don't own Twilight or New Moon. I do not own Womanizer by Britney Spears. I don't own George Clooney but I own the SIR unit NAMED George Clooney for I made him up. I don't own Whatever You Like by Weird Al Yankovic. I don't own the eBay song. I don't own Cartoon Heroes by Aqua, All Around Me by Flyleaf, and Let It Rock by Kevin Rudolph FT. Kanye West. I don't own the OC characters, like Amethyst and Kierra, Sam and Peter Griffin, Aneera and Leela, Feather and Vir, and Natalie and Bob. I DO own Jessie and Jesse. I don't own Explodything! I don't own Do You Like Waffles? by Parry Gripp. I own the GAY story that I wrote while writing this chapter. I also own the racism story that I'm ABOUT to write soon. I TOTALLY own Phineas and Ferb Theme Song. I don't own Right Now (Na Na Na) by Akon.  
**

**Note: For those people who wanted their characters in the story, well TOO BAD! You would have told me before because I already got everybody in and I'm not adding in anymore. Wow I'm mean, but it's hard to make a story with other people's characters in it.  
**

****

**FUN FACT: I didn't know what Sabes Que meant. I had to research it. I'M NOT SPANISH!!**


	6. Giant Gorilla

**Chapter 6. Rated T for censored swearing, explicit lyrics, crude racism, senseless murdering, dramatic drama, and etc. Disclaimers at bottom. **

**Irken Idol  
Chapter 6: Giant Gorilla**

Setting: Still walking TO the Awesome Room  
-Danicka was still being dragged away by the headless clown to The Awesome Room while Nicole and Voldemort were walking calmly.

**Danicka. **PUT ME DOWN! I HATE YOU CLOWN!

**Headless Clown. **No.

**Danicka. **How can you talk? You don't have a head!

**Nicole. **That's one of the senseless things that I make people do in my stories, Danicka. I thought you were used to this..

**Danicka. **Yeahh well when this stuff happens to ZIM!! Not me!! _(starts struggling but obviously made no effort)_

**Voldemort. **Wow that was suckish.

**Nicole. **I know but how was I supposed to end the last chapter? Get a giant llama to fall from the skies? I already did that in another story.

**Voldemort. **No, the fact that you never told me who would win!

**Nicole. **I DID tell you.

**Voldemort. **NO. All you said was " IT'S-- " and that's it!! You only did that to add suspense to the last chapter.

**Nicole. **Yeahh..(laughs) Hey! I'll tell you something else though. Dib's gonna get a girlfriend.

**Voldemort. **I'm not all that crazy about romances so I don't care about that.

**Danicka. **I knew that!

**Nicole. **Because it was part of your idea!! Just watch. When we get to the Awesome Room, you'll see.

**Voldemort. **Mhm..

* * *

Setting: THE AWESOME ROOM!  
-A lot of people were sitting talking excitedly to each other while some people just sat in the corner doing nothing but reading a book or listening to their iPod or all that crap.  
Let me describe who is in the room. The people who ALREADY made it in were:  
**1. Zim** and** Gir** (-Aneera-'s dimension)  
**2. Zim** and **Febreze** (invaderzimfannumber1's dimension)  
**3. Chris Brown **and **Brown Chris **(robot)  
**4. Billy** and **Mandy** (robot)  
**5. Utah** (a Vortian) and **Dakota** (robot)  
**6. Gary Coleman** and **Brian** (robot)  
**7. John Tartaglia **(from Johnny and the Sprites) and **Mr. Man **(robot)  
**8. Stewie **(from Family Guy) and** Brian** (dog)  
**9. Dexter** (from Dexter's Laboratory) and** D 3000** (robot)

-The people who JUST made it were:  
**1. Dib** and **BOB**  
**2. Zim** and **Gir**  
**3. Amethyst** and **Kierra**  
**4. Tak **and **MIMI**  
**5. Skoodge** and **George CLOONEY!**  
**6. Sam **and **Peter Griffin** (Singsong2020)  
**7. Aneera** and** Leela **(-Aneera-)  
**8. Feather **and** Vir** (ExplodyThing)  
**9. Natalie **and** BOB **(ribbonhamhamgir)  
**10. Jessie McCartney **and **Jesse**  
NOTE: The people's names in parantheses ARE the people who are IN the story.  
-So in all there are 19 partners in that same room. I'm surprised the room is bigger than I imagined in my head.

**Chris Brown. **Hey!! It's Nicole!!

**Nicole. **CHRIS BROWN! (screams)

**Danicka. **You'd think by now she'd get over that. Nicole, why don't you be a NORMAL sister and like the Jonas Brothers instead?

**Nicole. **Nah. Man, I should have put Rihanna in here. But I got her for something else.

**Danicka. **Hah well...

**Nicole. **I got an announcement to make!!

-Everybody in The Awesome Room look at Nicole.

**Nicole. **WE FINALLY GOT DONE WITH JUDGING EVERYBODY! You people are the people that got to make it to Wollywood!

-Everyone cheers.

**Everyone. **WHOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

-Everyone is still cheering....

**Danicka. **Okay, guys, we get it; you're happy--

-Everyone is STILL cheering...

**Voldemort. **SHUT UP EVERYBODY OR YOU'RE ALL GONNA HAVE TO BE SENT BACK TO YOUR HOME PLANETS!!!!

-Everyone is quiet.

**Voldemort. **That's what I thought. Anyway, you all are going to go to a rocketship that will lead you to Planet Wollywood. When you get there, I will give you guys your room keys at the Kajolica Hotel and two people are staying in one room. I DON'T WANT ANY COMPLAINTS!

**Danicka. **He's serious. No complaints.

**Nicole. **Yeah.

**Danicka. **Yeah.

**Voldemort. **Ok guys just follow me as we walk out to the rocketship.

-Everybody walks behind Voldemort to the rocketship out of the Awesome Room and to the outside world of Planet Irk.

* * *

Setting: Outside  
-Voldemort was still leading the people to the rocketship.  
-Dib was walking and saw her. Did he see who he thought he saw?

**Dib. **JESSIE MCCARTNEY?!

-Jessie looks to who said her name.

**Jessie. **Oh hi! You're Dib right?

**Dib. **Yep! The banana king! Everyone knows me because I'm the banana king!

**Jessie. **Well yeahh that but that's not how I know you. Uhh... my cousin told me all about you. He's like BEST FRIENDS with you.

**Dib. **Best friend?

**Jessie. **Yeah. My cousin, Keef.

**Dib. **KEEF IS YOUR COUSIN?

**Jessie. **Yeah! Why is that surprising?

**Dib. **It's just that no one at school knew that.

**Jessie. **Yeah uh ok. I see you're a fan.

**Dib. **YEAH YOU'RE LIKE AWESOME! Your singing and all that stuff!!

**Jessie. **Ohmygod you're so cute. I know this sounds weird but I like nerds.. and not just the candy.. (winks)

**Zim. **(walks right next to Jessie) Jessie. Let me introduce myself. I am ZIM!! The most superior individual of my species, other than my Tallests, and the most superior than EVERYTHING ELSE! Except my Tallests... I'm sure you should have the need to know that because I AM ZIM!!

**Dib. **Just shut up

**Zim. **OH YOU FILTHY DIB!

**Dib. **Zim.

**Zim. **Worm baby.

**Dib. **Alien scum.

**Zim. **Pathetic beast.

-Gaz walks up to Jessie.

**Gaz. **Ignore them. They're just stupid.

**Jessie. **Oh and you are...

**Gaz. **I'm Gaz. I'm Dib's sister..unfortunately. I'm forced to come with him.

**Jessie. **Oh so are you singing?

**Gaz. **No. I bet I sing well though. But I think this whole competition is stupid. You see people get record deals out of this stuff. Record deals for people singing OTHER PEOPLE'S songs. I see Americans aren't the ones with a screwed up society. But what do I care about our society? (pulls out Game Slave VIII (eight) )

**Jessie. **Oh... ehh...

-Danicka walks next to them.

**Danicka. **Oh hey! Are you excited about the thing?

**Jessie. **Uh yeah I am.

**Danicka. **Watch out though. My sister's doing something CRAZY for the first round.

**Jessie. **I bet I can pass it.

**Danicka.** No no it doesn't matter how good you are. It's random.

**Jessie. **What's random?

**Danicka. **You'll see! HAHA I LOVE DRAMATIC SUSPENSE!!!

-Danicka runs away.

**Zim. **What am I doing here? I should be OVER THERE telling EVERYBODY how I will win Irken Idol!!

**Dib. **NO I WILL WIN AND YOU KNOW IT!!

**Tak. **NO I WILL WIN!!!!!!!!!!!!

**Feather. **I WILL!!

**Amethyst. **I WILL!!!

**Natalie, Sam, and Aneera. **NO I WILL!!!!

**Voldemort. **WILL YOU GUYS STOP SHOUTING AT EACH OTHER??? YOUR VOICES FILL ME WITH RAGE!!

**Gaz. **You're not the only one..

-NOTE: For the people who are slow, they are CURRENTLY walking in the outside world to the rocket ship.

**Danicka. **Haha it's funny cuz Nicole says the same thing to her friends when she gets annoyed. Hey.. What happened to everybody's robots?

**Nicole.** OH yeah I forgot. _(takes out notebook and starts to write in it) _I will say that they went in a separate spaceship for themselves only that also leads them to Wollywood because we ran out of room in this spaceship.

**Danicka. **You have a great way of putting things.

**Nicole. **YEAH!! THANKS!! Haha!! Hey do you think I should make them start to sing a song?

**Danicka. **Now? Nahh I don't think you should.

**Nicole. **Are you sure? ...Okay I guess.. Let's watch them argue and shout at each other!!

**Danicka. **OKAY!!

**Dexter, Stewie, John Tartaglia, Gary Coleman, Utah, Chris Brown, and Zim. **NO I WILL WIN!!

**Nicole. **I really shouldn't have put this much people in Wollywood, and THAT'S WHY I'm doing something stupid in the First Round that'll make this A LOT EASIER FOR ME!

**Danicka. **Ok, Nicole, stop telling your ideas out loud because you're REALLY ruining the story.

**Nicole. **...uhm okay.

**Amethyst. **NO, KIERRA AND I WILL WIN!! We're awesome singers!! WE WILL BEAT YOU ALL PATHETIC LOSERS!!

**Dib. **Hahaa she acts just like you.

**Zim. **Hey, that's Bessy!

**Amethyst. **MY NAME IS AMETHYST!! You're Zim!! THE ONE THAT TRICKED ME!! OHH I HATE YOU!! I'M SO GLAD THAT MY DAD ISN'T LIKE YOU!! Well maybe he does, BUT AT LEAST HE ISN'T DUMB LIKE A MOOSE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

**Zim. **I'M GLAD I DON'T HAVE A STUBBORN SMEET LIKE YOU oh and YOU are DUMB LIKE A MOOSE!!!!!!!!!! Not just ANY moose!! CANADIAN MOOSES!!!!

**Amethyst. **(gets mad) I SWEAR YOU'RE A LOT WORSE THAN ANY DIBS I MIGHT EVER MEET FROM ANY OTHER DIMENSION!!

**Another Zim. **Amethyst?

**Amethyst. **What?!

-She looks at the other Zim.

**Amethyst. **Are you dad? ... Or are you just another stupid clone?

**Another Zim. **AMETHYST!!

-NOTE: FROM NOW ON, I'LL CALL "ANOTHER ZIM" AS " ***Zim** ."

**Amethyst. **DAD!!!!!

***Zim. **Amethyst!! (hugs her)

-Amethyst hugs her dad.

**Zim. **Ughh this is making me sick. Is there ANYBODY ELSE here that's me?!

**Different Zim. **(cough)

**Zim. **WHO ARE YOU?!

-I'LL CALL DIFFERENT ZIM AS ****Zim**.

****Zim. **I'm ZIM!! FROM THE FUTURE!!

**Zim. **ME?! Omg!! I'm as HANDSOME AS EVER!! Looks like I NEVER LOST MY AMAZING GOOD LOOKS!!

**Dib. **Since when did you ever have them?

-Zim GROWLS.

**Dib. **You don't scare me.

**Zim. **Are you really me from the future?

****Zim. **I was just kidding. I'm from a different dimension....

**Zim. **EXPLAIN YOURSELF TO MEE!!

****Zim. **I'm happily married with a son and I'm currently trying to save Earth from DOOM.

**Zim. **OH MAN YOU'RE WORSE THAN THAT AMETHYST'S DAD!! AHH!!!!!!!!

**Amethyst. **At least you remembered my name... Dad!! How'd you get here??

***Zim. **I saw the Irken Idol commercial and decided to go and try to win that AWESOME death machine!! WE CAN BRING EARTH TO OUR DOOM!!!

**Amethyst. **And you made it?! YES so we get a BETTER chance to win!! HAHA!!

**Zim. **HEY THAT'S NOT FAIR!!! AMETHYST YOU'RE CHEATING!!

**Amethyst. **NO I'M NOT!! I CLEARLY HAD NO IDEA MY DAD WAS GONNA BE HERE ANYWAY!!

**Jessie. **Are they always like this?

**Gaz. **I only see this kind of stuff between Zim and Dib.

**Dib. **Well he's worse around people who are practically ACTUAL clones of himself... the only difference is that Zim was never in a relationship...

**Zim. **Female acquaintances are useless and are for the weak minded. We don't love anyway.

**Dib.** It's called girlfriend. Yeah it's pretty evident you'll grow OLD and ALONE.

**Zim. **(starts attacking him)

**Amethyst. **FIGHT FIGHT FIGHT!! Uhh dad shouldn't you have a robot thing?

***Zim. **I do have a robot. His name is Febreze. I had to build him myself because Gir is probably with you and I didn't know where you went. He's on the rocket ship with all the other USELESS robots (besides Kierra).

**Feather. **FEBREZE!? OMG OMG OMG OMG OMG OMG!!

**Amethyst. **What?

**Feather. **I LOVE FEBREZE!!

**Natalie. **ME TOO!! I LOVE TO SPRAY IT ON STUFF!!

**Feather. **I KNOW!!!!! IT'S LIKE SO AWESOME !!!

**Natalie. **Hey!!! I got Febreze with me right now!!

**Feather. **Really?! OMG OMG OMG!!

-Natalie takes out Febreze and she and Feather run around spraying people with Febreze.

**Zim. **WHAT DID YOU SPRAY ON ME ?!

**Feather. **FEBREZE!!

-She sprayed some more.

**Zim. **GET THAT AWAY FROM ME!! YOU'RE SO UGLY!!

**Feather. **WHEN I GET VIR BACK, OHH YOU'LL SOO DIE FROM MY... ALMIGHTY BINDER!!

**Aneera. **I LOVE VIR!!

**Feather. **ME TOO!! HEY! WANNA SPRAY PEOPLE WITH MY FEBREZE?!

**Aneera. **OKAY!!

-She starts to spray some people, too. Then she ends up seeing.. him.

**Aneera. **HONEYY!!

****Zim.** Aneera!! It's been a while!!

-They hug.

**Aneera. **Uhh.. where's Noah!?

****Zim. **He.. ran away.

**Aneera. **What?!

****Zim. **HE JUST DID!!! I don't know what happened!!

**Aneera. **I can't believe I'm saying this because I might sound like a careless mother but I'm pretty sure Noah can take care of himself. WE can't go back to find him now. All we can do is trust that he can survive...

**Dib. **You are married?

****Zim. **Yeah and in my dimension, you and I were best friends.

**Dib. **Whoaa.. that's creepy...I DESPISE Zim. Okay.. I'll just.. uhh walk away.

-He walks backwards to Nicole.

**Dib. **Oh uhh Nicole.

**Nicole. **Dib.

**Dib.** How long does it take to get to the rocket ship?

**Nicole. **Pretty long. I'm not even sure if we can make it there until the next chapter.

**Dib.** WHY?!

**Nicole. **Because I probably feel too lazy or ... wait why do YOU care?

**Dib. **Lots of weird people..

**Nicole. **Get used to it. Not everyone's what you think they are.

**Dib. **I know but THREE ZIMS. They all had a child! Except the NORMAL Zim I know.

**Nicole. **Oh... Zim won't think YOU'RE normal.

**Dib. **What do you mean?

**Nicole. **I was just thinking about a story I finished.

**Dib. **Am I in it?

**Nicole.** You are...... at the end.

**Dib. **Who are they? (points to seven other people just walking by themselves)

**Nicole. **Oh they're people not RELATED to the Invader Zim series at all. See that is Chris Brown. The other one is Utah and he's a Vortian. That other dude is Gary Coleman. Then, the dude next to him is John Tartaglia and he's from Johnny and the Sprites. That's a show from Playhouse Disney. That one over there is OBVIOUSLY Stewie from Family Guy. That one is Dexter from Dexter's Laboratory.

**Dib. **OH wow. Who's gonna win?

**NICOLE. **I'M NOT TELLING YOU!!

**Dib. **Oh man I'm running out of money.

**Nicole. **You don't need money.

**Dib. **Yeah but in case--

**Nicole. **You don't need money.

**Dib. **Help the homeless!!

**Nicole. **You're not homeless.

**Dib. **Helping us brings us closer to God... so give me a quarter.

**Nicole. **I don't have any change.

**Dib. **Okay then give me a dollar.

**Nicole. **That's not what I meant.

**Dib. **Give me five.

**Nicole. **Are you serious?

**Dib. **The more you give the more you get!! That's being--

**Nicole. **I know what song you're trying to sing but I'm not in the mood to sing any songs right now.. especially not with fictional characters.

**Dib. **Oh yeah what song was that then?

**Nicole. **It was gonna be the Money Song. Now leave me alone while I try to think on how to continue this chapter because right now it's being real real slow.

**Dib. **You watch too much TV.

**Nicole. **I get that a lot... _(walks away with the notebook she's still trying to write in)_

**Danicka. **Leave it to Nicole to write all this stuff herself.

**Dib. **I thought you write together

**Danicka. **Mhm well. Wow Nicole IS right. This chapter IS slow. HURRY IT UP!!

**Nicole. **Okay okay!! GOD!! _(writes stuff in notebook)_

**Voldemort. **I FOUND THE ROCKET SHIP!!

**Dib. **FINALLY!!!

**Everybody else. **WHOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

**Nicole. **Happy now, Danicka?

**Danicka. **Yep.

**Nicole. **So I can get the first round over with, finish the story, and get on with all the other stories we brainstormed.

-Everybody walks into the rocket ship.

**Feather. **Why couldn't you just make a teleporter so that you can teleport us straight to Planet Wollywood?

**Nicole. **Because complicated processes are cool

**Danicka. **YEA!! COMPLICATED!!

**Sam. **Right? Just put a teleporter and--

**Nicole. **Okay I get the point..

-Everyone goes in the rocket ship.

* * *

Setting: Rocket Ship  
-Everyone is being seated in the rocket ship.

**Nicole. **Everyone choose where you wanna sit and enjoy the ride!!

**Aneera. **Who's driving?

**Nicole. **Feather is.

**Feather. **YAY!!!

-Feather runs to the control room to drive.

* * *

Setting: Control Room  
-Nicole follows her in.

**Feather. **How do I work this?

**Nicole. **You press that big shiny button.

-She presses the big shiny button.

**FEATHER. **OMG IT'S SO SHINY I LOVE SHINY THINGS!! How do I drive?

**Nicole. **You move that wheel to move left and right. Follow what that map says.

**Voldemort. **Nicole, are you sure about letting her drive? Why don't you let ME drive?

**Nicole. **Because you're mean and you're not a vampire.

**Voldemort. **She isn't one either!

**Feather. **WHEE!!! THIS IS SO COOL!

-The rocket ship leans back and forth.

* * *

Setting: Rocket Ship

**Jessie. **So wanna go out?

**Dib. **Uh okay?

**Jessie. **YAY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

**Amethyst. **That's just sick, Jessie.

***Zim. **PATHETIC!!

**Aneera. **Aww I think it's sweet.

**Zim. **Oh man I'm so glad that Nicole doesn't have to make me go through this.

**Nicole. **Yeah.. haha.. for now....

**Zim. **FOR NOW?? WHAT DO YOU MEAN?!

**Nicole. **You'll see (smirks)

**Zim. **STOP SMIRKING!!

**Nicole. **Why can't I? It's fun!!

**Danicka. **Yeah the weird stories come in after this one.

**Zim. **What do you mean AFTER THIS ONE? You got a FAMOUS ROCK STAR to be a girlfriend of the BOY OF A GARGANTUAN HEAD DIB?! YOU'RE PATHETIC, LIKE ALL THE OTHER HYOOOOOOMANS!!

**Dib. **That's pretty awesome though.

**Natalie. **What are you talking about? Periods?

**Zim. **What is a period?

-Nicole giggles.

**Zim. **GIGGLING? Why are you giggling??

**Nicole. **Because you sound HILARIOUS when you say 'GIGGLING' and it's the fact that you don't know what a period is...

**Zim. **I don't see how that's funny!!!!

**Danicka. **IT'S A PUNCTUATION MARK AT THE END OF A SENTENCE!!

**Dib. **Wow I bet he doesn't even know what gay means.

**Zim. **Yeah.. I do....

**Dib. **Oh yeah?

***Zim. **YOU FOOLISH DIB!!! Everyone knows what gay means!!

**Dib. **Well not THAT Zim.

**Zim. **I do know what it means!

**Billy. **I LIKE PIE!!

**Dib. **Who are you?

**Billy. **I'M BILLY! MY BEST FRIENDS ARE GRIM AND MANDY!

**Danicka. **Nicole, you got BILLY in here?

**Nicole. **I was bored.

**Billy. **CHICKEN WINGS ARE GOOD!!

**Amethyst. **He sounds kind of like you, Dad.

***Zim. **Wow.

**Zim. **He sounds like me too!! WHAT IS THIS?!

**Danicka. **Do you guys know that you are cartoons?

**Zim. **I'M A CARTOON?!?!?!?!!!

**Danicka. **Do I have to explain EVERYTHING?!?!

**Nicole. **Nahh don't tell him. He's better off if he doesn't know that kind of stuff.

**Zim. **WHAT STUFF?! YOU WILL REGRET NOT REVEALING ME THE KNOWLEDGE THAT YOU KNOW!!

**Nicole. **Sure...WAIT WHERE'S GEORGE LOPEZ?

* * *

Setting: Planet Irk  
-George Lopez is outside, with a bunch of sandwiches outside on the ground forming big words that say "SOS."

**George Lopez. **Oh forget this. I'm going home. I QUIT Irken Idol.

-He goes in his ship and flies all the way back to Earth.

* * *

Setting: Rocket Ship

**Nicole. **WE FORGOT HIM!!

**Danicka. **How can you forget him?! WE NEED A NEW HOST!!

**John Tartaglia. **I WILL HOST!!

**Everybody else. **JOHN FROM JOHNNY AND THE SPRITES?

**John. **Yes!!

**Nicole. **You're hired!

* * *

Setting: Planet Wollywood  
-Feather roughly lands the ship on Planet Wollywood.

**Feather. **SORRY EVERYBODY!!

-Everyone gets out of the ship.

**Voldemort. **OH LOOK WHAT YOU HAVE DONE, FEATHER!! You got scratches over my new Honda rocket ship!!

**Feather. **Oh I'm sorry.. SHEESH

**Nicole. **It's okay, Feather, Voldemort is tempered. As long as you got everybody safely on ground-

**Voldemort. **What do you mean 'SAFELY ON GROUND?' My ship is RUINED!!

**Nicole. **(ignores Voldemort) then it doesn't really matter to me.

-They hear someone screaming in pain.

**Aneera. **Help!! Gary Coleman broke his leg!

**Feather and Nicole. **GARY COLEMAN?!

-They both run to see Aneera and Natalie trying to help Gary.

**Natalie. **GARY?! WWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWHHHHYYYYYYYYYYYYYY?!

**Nicole. **How did this happen?

**Gary****. **My leg broke when the ship landed!!

-Everyone looks at Feather..

**Feather. **Uh.. sorry?

**Gary****. **I can't go on like this!! I have to go back home!! I CAN'T SING!!

**Nicole. **YOU STILL CAN SING WITH A BROKEN LEG!! Unless something happens...

-A witch comes out of nowhere.

**Witch. **Are you Gary Coleman?

**Gary****. **Yep.

**Witch. **I HATE BLACK PEOPLE SO I HATE YOU!!

-She uses her powers and does something to him.

**Natalie. **What did you do to him?

**Gary****. **OH wow MY LEG HURTS SOO BAD!! OWW MAN!! I NEE-

**Feather. **What?

-Gary tries to speak but he can't.  
-The witch runs away.

**Nicole. **What a racist bi-(censored).

**Aneera. **Guys guys I think Gary can't speak!!

-You see Gary trying to mouth his words but nothing is coming out.

**Nicole. **AWW MAN!! We don't have Gary Coleman?

-Sam runs to the group.

**Sam. **We gotta get to the hotel... everyone's waiting for youu...

**Nicole. **Sammy can you call the ambulance? We lost Gary Coleman...

**Sam. **Gary Coleman? WHYYY?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!!!

**Natalie. **I know how you feel...

**Aneera. **Why don't we just get Voldemort to heal him?

**Voldemort. **NO! My rocket ship is magic proof so now I can't fix it. Why should I fix Gary Coleman? (walks to the hotel)

-The ambulance floats all the way to Gary Coleman and they take him away...

**Nicole. **Oh great now we gotta tell Brian that Gary isn't singing...

**Sam. **Brian?

**Nicole. **It's Gary's robot...

-The girls walk to the Kajolica Hotel.

**Sam. **What kind of name is Kajolica?

**Nicole. **I.. uhh... got it from a cartoon...

* * *

Setting: Kajolica Hotel - Lobby

-Everyone was waiting in the main lobby... or fighting...

**Dexter. **(in the accent thing) WHERE HAVE YOU BEEN, NICOLE????? I CAN NOT WAIT ANY LONGER!! My ROBOT and I are WAITING!

**Nicole. **Why do you even WANT a death machine?

**Dexter. **Maybe I can alter the circuits of the contraption to invent something new.

**Danicka. **Okay so Nicole got everybody paired up!...

**Zim. **I WILL WIN!! NONE SHALL WIN BUT ME!!

***Zim. **WE WILL WIN!

**Amethyst. **YEAH!!

**Dib. **YOU'LL NEVER GET THAT DEATH MACHINE, ZIM!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

**Zim. **SHUT YOUR NOISE TUBES!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

**Nicole. **This should be interesting...

**Danicka. **What?

**Nicole. **Oh... just read the pairing thing so they could just get to their rooms (gives Danicka the paper)

**Danicka. **LISTEN TO ME!!...

****Zim. **SILENCE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

-Everyone is quiet.

**Danicka. **We lost two contestants, Gary Coleman and Brian, and John Tartaglia because he decided to host the show since we lost George Lopez.

**Nicole. **Yeah... I'll miss George Lopez.

**Danicka. **Two people are living in the same room. The pairing is as follows:  
Aneera and Feather  
Skoodge and Utah  
Zim and *Zim  
Sam and Stewie  
Billy and Natalie  
Dexter and Dib  
**Zim and Chris Brown  
Amethyst, Tak, and Jesse

**Zim. ***Zim...

***Zim. **Zim...

-They look at each other scornfully.

**Stewie. **Uhh.. Sam?

**Sam. **Hey aren't you from Family Guy? I DIDN'T KNOW YOU WERE SINGING!!

**Stewie. **Why else am I getting that death machine?

**Nicole and Danicka. **(to Sam) HI SAMMY!!

**Sam. **Hi!!

**Nicole. **Ahh I know it's passed Christmas but I got you a Christmas present!!

**Sam. **OH WHAT IS IT WHAT IS IT WHAT IS IT WHAT IS IT WHAT IS IT WHAT IS IT?!?!?!??!!?!?!

-Danicka gives her the present.  
-Sammy opens up the gift like a wild animal.

**Nicole. **Geez Sam.... don't kill it.

**Sam. **FLUFFY BUNNY SLIPPERS?!

**Danicka. **Yeah!! Press their noses!!

-Sammy presses their nose.  
-The sound says "MOO."

**Sam. **SLIPPERS THAT GO MOO?! YOU GUYS ARE THE BEST!!

-They hug. Then Nicole and Danicka run away to wherever the world takes them.

**Stewie. **HOW DID YOU GET FREE THINGS FROM THEM?

**Sam. **CHRISTMAS GIFTS!!

**Stewie. **Christmas? I see Christmas gives people the power to give you things that you so hopefully wish for, and not just Santa!! Will YOU get me something for Christmas??

**Sam. **Uh sure..? What do you want?

**Stewie. **I don't know. Surprise me. My email is loismustdie - all one word - at

***Zim. **WHY AM I PAIRED UP WITH ZIM? I should be with Amethyst!!

**Amethyst. **Yeah!!

**Nicole. **Because we had an uneven number of pairs, we had to put three of you in one suite. You guys - you, Tak, and Jessie - are in the presidential suite.

**Jessie. **SWEET!

**Amethyst. **Okay.. maybe I'm fine with that...

**Danicka. **That has free room service....

**Jessie. **AWESOME!!

**Tak. **I could care less about what room I'm in... really... as long as I'm FAR away from Zim.

**Amethyst. **I hate you Zim.

**Tak. **Me too.

***Zim. **Me too.

**Dib. **Me too. Wow. Four people.

**Aneera. **Why can't I be with my husband?

**Danicka. **Because we're only putting people of one gender in the same room.

**Aneera. **But I'm married... and what about Stewie and Sam, and Billy and Natalie?

**Feather. **I thought you liked me!!

**Aneera. **I do!!

**Nicole. **OKAY!! SORRY!! MISTAKE!! It's SAM AND NATALIE and STEWIE AND BILLY!!

**Stewie. **Who are you?

**Billy. **I'M BILLY!!! Who are you?

**Stewie. **I'm Stewie. Oh my, you've got a big nose.

**Billy. **You got a weird accent and a weird shaped head. Do you like chicken?

-Nicole passes out the room keys to everybody.

**Nicole. **Okay here are your keys. Don't lose them because I don't have enough money to afford new keys.

**Sam. **But it's YOUR story. You can make yourself rich and...

**Danicka. **Yeah, right?

**Nicole. **Nah.. I'm too lazy to type all that.

**Zim. **ROOM 990?! WHY DON'T I GET THE PRESIDENTIAL SUITE!!

**Nicole. **Because then you'll have to be in the same room as the three girls.

**Tak. **Isn't that room next to ours?

**Danicka. **Yeah, got a problem with that?

**Tak. **YES.

**Amethyst. **Me too. Can you just get the army and send Zim to the moon?

**Nicole. **Wollywood doesn't have a moon.

**Amethyst. **Then send him to the Sun. I don't mean MY DAD because MY DAD is awesome.

**Voldemort. **I SAID NO COMPLAINTS!!

**Skoodge. **I got room 970.

**Gaz. **What about me?

**Danicka. **You're not a part of Irken Idol so you're gonna have to rent your own room.

**Gaz. **I guess I'll just have to pay with my own money... (pulls out a few thousand dollar bills)

**Dib. **There's such thing as a thousand dollar bill?

**Nicole. **YEP! I searched it on eBay.

**Danicka. **EBay rocks.

**Nicole. **PEOPLE... Just go to your rooms and rest. First round is tomorrow!! Get to Irken Idol by 8! OH and your robots are already in your rooms...

-Everyone leaves to go to their rooms.

**Danicka. **Why did you make their robots suddenly appear in their rooms?

**Nicole. **Got too lazy to --

**Danicka. **You didn't make Utah talk at all. Why did you put him in the story?

**Nicole. **Oh you'll see.

**Danicka. **Don't tell me you're making a random and unknown person win Irken Idol.

**Nicole. **Mhm...

* * *

Setting: Amethyst, Tak, and Jessie's Room

**Amethyst. **Kierra!!

**Kierra. **Hi, Master!! All the robots in the other spaceship were annoying, especially Gir. But anyway, he's here with us now...

**Gir. **Hi little Master!! Where's Master?

**Amethyst. **He's in the other room--

-Gir starts to run out of the room but Kierra stops him.

**Amethyst. **You can't go to dad. You have to stay with us for now. You'll see him tomorrow. What song should we sing?

**Kierra. **We should sing that song by McBride.

**Amethyst.** I like that song. NO DOUBT we'll pass the first round.

**Kierra. **I hate Voldemort.

**Amethyst. **I hate ZIM more.

**Kierra. **What-

**Amethyst. **I'm not talking about dad. The one that's from THIS dimension. COOKIE'S Zim. Why does Nicole make Zim so egotistic?

**Tak. **Whether it's Nicole or not, he's BEEN stupid like that. He thinks he's so amazing and all that crap. How did he EVEN make it to Wollywood?

**Jessie. **I heard that they sang "Crank Dat Soulja Boy." Nicole liked the fact that Gir sang Soulja Boy.

**Jesse. **What should WE sing, Master?

**Jessie. **I don't know. I'll think of it when I'm done reading this book...

**Amethyst. **What are you reading?

**Jessie. **It's called "Breaking Wind." It's about a girl having to turn into a turtle. But a vampire falls in love with her but SHE loves the turtle instead. I LOVE this book. It's the last book of the "Twidark" saga.

**Mimi. **I think I know what we should sing.

**Jessie. **You guys sang Britney Spears!!

**Tak. **I know. I felt retarded singing that song.

**Jessie. **ARE YOU SERIOUS?! I love that song!! I'm best friends with Britney Spears and Michael Jackson.

**Tak. **You're friends with the weirdest people.

**Amethyst. **Yeah I know. Especially Dib. Why did you have to go out with him?

**Jessie. **I don't know... I just had the need to say that.... I didn't know what I was saying-

**Amethyst. **Oh it's Nicole. Authors can do that to you. No matter HOW MUCH YOU HATE IT, you end up doing it. I feel the exact same away...

**Tak. **At least I'm not a made up character.

**Jessie. **But you're IN a story.

**Amethyst. **You're gonna be controlled too. WAIT WHAT TIME IS IT?

**Tak. **10. Why?

**Amethyst. **I need to sleep! I need at least 8 hours of sleep...

**Jessie. **You can just stay up 'til midnight. You'll wake up at 8 anyway...

-Amethyst goes to sleep right away.  
-Jessie was thinking REALLY REALLY hard about what their next song should be.

-Tak was thinking, too.... or what seemed like it. DUN DUN DUN!!

OH NO! OH NO! OH NO! OH NO! OH NO! OH NO! OH NO! OH NO! OH NO! OH NO! OH NO! OH NO! OH NO! OH NO! OH NO! OH NO! OH NO! OH NO! OH NO! OH NO! OH NO!  
OH NO! OH NO! OH NO! OH NO! OH NO! OH NO! OH NO! OH NO! OH NO! OH NO! OH NO! OH NO! OH NO! OH NO! OH NO! OH NO! OH NO! OH NO! OH NO! OH NO! OH NO!

* * *

Setting: Stewie's and Billy's Room

-Stewie was thinking of what he should sing.

**Stewie. **WE CAN USE THAT DEATH MACHINE TO KILL LOIS!! MUAHAHAHA!!!

**Brian. **What should we sing?

**Billy. **Hey!! I thought we were supposed to have robots sing!! NOT OUR DOGS!!

**Stewie. **QUICK! HE'S ONTO US!!

-Brian takes a chair and knocks out Billy.  
-Stewie grabs Billy and throws him out the window.

-Billy falls out 30,000 stories and fell to the ground.  
-Stewie and Brian look through the window.

**Stewie. **Is he dead? Dump acid on him just to make sure.

**-**Brian gets a big bucket of acid and dumps it on Billy.  
-Billy's skin burns to his skeleton and then to NOTHING!

**Brian. **What about his robot?

**Stewie. **I got that.

-Stewie takes out flamethrower and burns the robot to nothing.

**Stewie. **As long as Nicole doesn't know you're a dog, we're just fine.

WTF?! WTF?! WTF?! WTF?! WTF?! WTF?! WTF?! WTF?! WTF?! WTF?! WTF?! WTF?!

* * *

Setting: Irken Idol  
-THE NEXT DAY!

-It was a giant room. The chairs were filled with people who were too happy and were cheering even though no one was on stage. There's a big giant stage in the front with giant screens behind. It's for close-ups, like you see in those Hannah Montana concerts. There was a little table with three chairs behind it where the judges sit. The floor says "IRKEN IDOL!" There was a small microphone on the stage. On the left, there was a little room for the people who were going to sing.

-Oh and I almost forgot to say that on the stage were 17 chairs and 17 smaller chairs (fit for their robots) next to the bigger chairs.  
-Bright, white lights were shining on top of them. Why? KEEP READING TO FIND OUT!

-Nicole, Danicka, and Voldemort went to their judging places.  
-John Tartaglia, who was NOW the host for Irken Idol because George Lopez made an unknown disappearance, came up to the stage to announce something.

-Everybody became quiet.  
-All the lights shone on him.

**John Tartaglia. **Hi guys this is John Tartaglia, also from Johnny and the Sprites, who is now the host. It's the reality show where we watch the people get judged and criticized. It's the show where we watch the people get their dreams crushed. It's the show where we watch people sing stupid songs!! IT'S IRKEN IDOL!!

-Everybody screams and cheers.

**John Tartaglia. **For the first round, I would like to call all the contestants up on stage.

-The contestants walk up on stage in confusion.

**John Tartaglia. **Please sit on these chairs that are perfectly lined up. The robots sit on the little chairs.

-They all sit.

**Zim. **HEY! WHAT'S GOING ON?? I THOUGHT WE WERE SINGING!!

**John. **Yeah but-

**Zim. **MY AMAAZIIINGG SINGINGG SHALL BE HEARD!!

**Tak. **Be quiet.

-She throws a taco at Zim.  
-Gir sees the taco and eats it.

**Zim. **DON'T EVER THROW MEXICAN FOOD AT ME!!

-Zim was about to stand up but weird robot tentacle things shot up from the chair and tied Zim real close to the chair.

**Zim. **LET ME AT HER!!!!

-He struggles.  
-The chair electrocutes him.

**Dib. **HAHA!

**Jessie. **Dib! Don't laugh at his pain!

**Dib. **Sorry, Jessie, but it's funny when Zim gets hurt!

**Amethyst. **(laughs) Haha yeahh...

***Zim. **PATHETIC AND WEAK ZIM!!

**NICOLE. **BE QUIET!! Let's just get on with the first round!! Wait. Where's Billy?

-Everyone looks to the empty chair.

**Stewie. **(in an almost innocent voice) Oh My God! What happened to Billy?

-The audience starts to murmur in confusion.

**Voldemort. **Oh well. Looks like Billy is out of the round.

-A worker of Irken Idol comes and takes the big chair and the small chair away.

**Stewie. **(to Brian) Our plan worked PERFECTLY!!

**Brian. **Yeah I know but SHUSH. They're watching us!!

-Stewie sees everyone, John Tartaglia, the judges, and the whole audience staring at them.  
-Awkward moment.

**Nicole. **Okay so let's just go through the round.

**John. **Right, Nicole!! Okay for this round, it's RANDOM ELIMINATION!

**Everybody. **Random elimination???

**-**The audience gasps in horror.

**John. **There are trap doors that lead to the basement of horror and pain-

**Zim. **Does the basement of horror and pain have to be painful?

**John. **Well they don't have to be-

**Natalie. **Yeah!! I don't like horror and pain!!

**Sam. **I LOVE HORROR AND PAIN!! My best friend is Chucky!! CHUUCKYYY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

**Nicole. **I hate Chucky.

**Danicka. **Isn't it that crazy murder doll?

**Sam. **He's awesome. So is Edward Cullen. :]

**Nicole. **Vampires are awesome!!!

**Sam. **I KNOW!!

**Voldemort. **Can we just get on with it?

**John. **There are trapdoors under each of your chairs.

-Everybody look under their chairs just to make sure.

**John. **Danicka will press a shiny yellow button on the desk. Once she does, all the lights (including the audience) will turn off, and red lights will shine on THREE people! The three people will be known as the BOTTOM THREE!! The Bottom Three will be sent through the trapdoor of doom and pain and horror. Keep in mind that once somebody ends up in the horrible basement, you are forever ELIMINATED!!

-Tension and suspense builds up between the competitors.

**Danicka. **NEAT!! I get to press a button of suspense!!

-The suspense button climbs up from the bottom of the judges' desk and up to the surface.  
-Nicole stares at the magnificent shiny button.

**Nicole. **So... shiny...

**John. **The audience can start the countdown from TEN!

**Audience. **NINE! EIGHT!

-Dramatic music plays.

**Audience. **SEVEN! SIX!

-MORE TENSION!

**Audience. **FIVE! FOUR!

-MORE SUSPENSE!

**Audience. **THREE! TWO!

-MORE DRAMA!!

**Audience. **One and a half...

-The audience counts more slowly.

**Audience. **(says it slower) One.. and a quarter....

***Zim. **COME ON!!!

**Audience. **ONE! ZERO!!!!!!

-Everything goes dark. Some people in the audience screamed because they were afraid of the dark. Wimps.  
-Suddenly, three red lights come on.

The red lights shone on:  
SAM AND PETER GRIFFIN! (gasp!)  
AMETHYST AND KIERRA! (gasp!)  
TAK AND MIMI!! (gasp some more!)

-But before anyone noticed, Tak and Mimi quickly grabbed Feather and Vir to take their place and switch seats.  
-Feather and Vir didn't notice at all until they were being stared at by millions or shall I say BILLIONS of eyes.

-Then they found out that they were under the red light!!  
-They were about to move and switch back with Tak, but the chair got robotic tentacles and wrapped Feather and Vir tightly.

**John. **So the bottom three are Sam and Peter Griffin, Amethyst and Kierra, and Feather and Vir. I see Feather's trying to get out.

**Feather. **Hey! That's not fair! Tak was supposed to be out! She switched places with me before anyone - not even the chair - saw anything!!!

**Tak. **What are you talking about? We did nothing!!

**John. **Since no one noticed and there's no witness to what the hell you're talking about, I'll assume you're lying and cheating.

**Feather. **Hey! That's not fair!

-The audience goes "ooh."

**Vir. **DON'T MAKE THE ALMIGHTY BINDER MAD!!

**John. **It's the way it is. Sorry guys. This is random elimination. WE don't choose the bottom three. Voldemort now gets to press the other button so the trapdoors can be released and these three fall to their doom.

**Amethyst. **NO!!!

**Sam. **GOOD BYE CRUEL WORLD!!

-The other button that happens to be shiny rises up to the surface of the table.  
-Voldemort could care less about how shiny the button is. He pressed it.

**Amethyst, Sam, and Feather.** NOO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

-Nothing.

**Sam. **NOOOOO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! THE PAIN!! THE HORROR!!!

**Voldemort. **What the?

-He pressed the button repeatedly.

-Nothing. Nothing's happening.

**Sam. **THE HORRIBLE DARK BASEMENT!!!

**Peter Griffin. **Master... we're not in the basement...

**Sam. **What?

**Peter. **We're still on stage....

-Sam stops panicking and looks around.

**Sam. **Oh... awkward...

**Nicole. **OH MY GOD!! THE TRAPDOORS WON'T OPEN!

-All the lights turn back on and go back to normal, except the three dramatic red lights.

**Danicka. **What happened?!

**Feather. **Well, we're not eliminated...

**Voldemort. **What ?

**Feather. **Look! John said that when we're in the basement, we're eliminated! But we're NOT in the basement, right? _(gets nervous and hopes that her plan works)_

**Amethyst. **Yeah! Haha _(weak laugh)..._ we're not exactly out.

**Sam. **WE'RE STILL IN!!

**Voldemort. **No!! You're all MEANT to be out!! The red lights are still shining on you!

***Zim. **John said that when they're in the basement, they're out. THEY'RE NOT IN THE BASEMENT!!

**Amethyst. **Yeah! Listen to us and Dad!! Dad is smart.

***Zim. **Thank you, Amethyst. I have raised you very well.

**Zim. **NO!! YOU GUYS SHOULD BE OUT!!

**Voldemort. **Basement or not, they're still gonna be out.

-The audience starts to say "BOO!"

**Danicka. **Why is the audience saying "Moo?"

**Nicole. **They're booing. LOOK !! THEY SHOULD BE OUT!! THE SHINY BUTTON SPOKE FOR ITSELF!! THEY HAVE TO-

-The audience boos some more and throw rocks at Nicole.

**Nicole. **Oh come on!! Where did they get rocks from??..._(faces the bottom three) _You're all eliminated!

-The audience throws some more rocks.

**Nicole. **Ouch... OUCH!!!!!!! Okay fine!! YOU GUYS STAY IN!!

-Feather, Amethyst, and Sam scream hooray!!

**Nicole. **I need to get some more Coke.

* * *

Setting: Kajolica Hotel - Lobby  
-Everybody was in there.

**Amethyst. **Wow that was close.

**Kierra. **Yes. It was. We didn't get to sing our song.

**Amethyst. **Let's hope we get to sing it on the second round.

-Nicole comes in.

**Natalie. **Why aren't you bleeding and stuff?

**Nicole. **I decided to heal myself. I wish it was easy as that in real life though.

-Danicka comes in, too.

**Danicka. **Okay people!! SECOND ROUND IS TOMORROW!! Same time same place.

**Jessie. **Hey, Dib, wanna come with me to this restaurant I saw?

**Dib.** Sure. It's a date.

-NOTE: Because I suck at romance scenes, I will just explain what happens.  
Dib and Jessie went to a restaurant called "The Awesome Restaurant."  
They ate food, talked about crap, and went to the hotel.

Dib walked Jessie to her room. They planned their next date to happen at the next day.  
After the second round, they decided to go to the movies to watch "Twilight."

Then, Dib left Jessie. No good night kiss. Aww.  
Would you feel sad?

I wouldn't. :P

-Oh wow!! No song yet?! That's so not like me!!

-Jessie was in her room.  
-Dib was in his room.

-A song starts playing.

Music Starts Playing  
**Jessie McCartney. **If I should die before I wake  
It's cause you took my breath away  
Losing you is like living in a world with no air  
Oh

**Dib. **I'm here alone didn't wanna leave  
My heart won't move it's incomplete  
If there was a way that I could make you understand

**Jessie McCartney. **But how do you expect me to live alone with just me?  
cause my world revolves around you it's so hard for me to breathe

**Jessie McCartney and Dib. **  
Tell me how I'm supposed to breathe with no air?  
Can't live, can't breathe with no air  
It's how I feel whenever you ain't there  
It's no air, no air  
Got me out here in the water so deep  
Tell me how you gon breathe without me?  
If you ain't here I just can't breathe  
It's no air, no air

No air, air (x4)

**Dib. **I walk, I ran, I jump, I flew  
Right off the ground to float to you  
With no gravity to hold me down for real

**Jessie McCartney. **But somehow I'm still alive inside  
You took my breathe but I survived  
I don't know how but I don't even care

**Jessie McCartney and Dib.**  
So how do you expect me to live alone with just me?  
cause my world revolves around you it's so hard for me to breathe

**Jessie McCartney and Dib.**  
Tell me how I'm supposed 2 breathe with no air?  
Can't live, can't breathe with no air  
It's how I feel whenever you ain't there  
It's no air, no air  
Got me out here in the water so deep  
Tell me how you gon breathe without me?  
If you ain't here I just can't breathe  
It's no air, no air

No air, air (x4)  
No more

_(instrumental solo)_  
It's no air, no air  
_(more solo)_

**Jessie McCartney and Dib. **OH

**Jessie McCartney and Dib.**  
Tell me how I'm supposed 2 breathe with no air?  
Can't live, can't breathe with no air  
It's how I feel whenever you ain't there  
It's no air, no air  
Got me out here in the water so deep  
Tell me how you gon breathe without me?  
If you ain't here I just can't breathe  
It's no air, no air

No air, no air (x4)  
So how do you expect me to live alone with just me?  
cause my world revolves around you it's so hard for me to breathe

Tell me how I'm supposed to breathe with no air?  
Can't live, can't breathe with no air  
It's how I feel whenever you ain't there  
It's no air, no air

**Jessie McCartney. **Got me out here in the water so deep  
**Dib. **Tell me how you gon breathe without me?  
**Jessie McCartney. **If you ain't here I just can't breathe  
**Jessie McCartney and Dib. **It's no air, no air

No air, air [x3]

No air  
Music ENDS.  
_Song was No Air by Jordin Sparks ft. Chris Brown_

* * *

Setting: Jessie McCartney, Tak, and Amethyst's Room  
**Amethyst. **Stop singing...

**Tak. **Yeah I know. How was your horrible day with Dib? Not that I care about anybody's day.

**Jessie. **Well-

**Amethyst. **She has a date with Dib tomorrow. They're gonna see Twilight.

**Jessie. **How-

**Amethyst. **I went intangible and fazed _(spelling?) _through the wall. Then, I went invisible to see what you guys were talking about and so you won't see me. I was about to leave when you guys were gonna have your good night "kiss."

**Tak. **YOU GUYS KISSED?! (starts to look sick)

**Jessie. **Uh.. no.

**Tak. **Aww...Oh well.

**Amethyst. **My powers are awesome.

**Tak. **Twilight is a sh-(censored) movie. The camera angles suck. It was so fake. The trailer says it all...

**Jessie. **?

**Tak. **I used to watch human television when I was back on Earth. They weren't all that great about human information.

**Jessie. **Twilight is a spin off of Twidark. But I heard it got good reviews. I guess. Well it's a romance.

-Amethyst got tired of the conversation so she went to sleep.

* * *

Setting: *Zim and Zim's Room

**Zim. **Look. I don't like you. You don't like me. Just because we're in the same room doesn't mean we should get along.

***Zim. **Just stay away from my daughter you FFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFILTHY DUMBA-(CENSORED).

**Zim. **Your vocabulary is no match for my AMAZING WORDS!! Words like AMAZING!!!!!!!! Aren't I AMAAAZING?!

***Zim. **You can kiss that death machine goodbye.

**Zim. **I'M NOT KISSING ANYTHING!!!

-Suddenly, a giant gorilla (like 7 feet tall) attacks the Kajolica Hotel. No wait, it only attacked Zim.  
-The giant gorilla barged into their room and took Zim and ran away.

**Zim. **NICOLE!! YOU WILL PAYY FOR MAKING THIS HAPPEN TO MEE!!!

-The gorilla ran away into the streets of Wollywood.  
-The word "Nicole" echoed.

* * *

Setting: Nicole and Danicka's Room  
-Nicole wakes up from the echo.

**Nicole. **I heard someone screaming. Someone trying to make me rue for something.

**Danicka. **That sounds bad.

**Nicole. **I know. Let's go outside.

-Nicole and Danicka walk outside to see the ground with giant unfamiliar footprints. With the footprints come the empty banana peels.

**Nicole. **SOMEONE GOT KIDNAPPED!

**Danicka. **Let's follow the unfamiliar and strange footprints!!

-They follow the footprints.

**Will they ever find Zim?? Will Dib and Jessie's relationship flourish into a beautiful and colorful blossom (I think that was a horrible metaphor)? Will Zim and *Zim ever get along? (I guess everyone would know the answer to that.) WHO WILL GET ELIMINATED FOR THE SECOND ROUND?! I ASSURE YOU that SOMEBODY will get ELIMINATED!!  
**READ CHAPTER 7 TO FIND OUT!!**  
**

**----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------**

**Disclaimers. (Some of my disclaimers might be repeated because I lost track of what I already listed.) I do not own the iPod. Wish I did though... All I have is a phone but I'm glad it can play music as well as an iPod :] . I do not own -Aneera-'s version of Zim and Gir, invaderzimfannumber1's version of Zim, Chris Brown, Billy, Gary Coleman, John Tartaglia, Stewie and Brian, and Dexter. I don't own the NAME Febreze. I do not own original Invader Zim characters. I do not own Amethyst and Kierra, Skoodge. I don't own Jonas Brothers. I don't own the Money Song from Avenue Q. I do not own the name Honda. I do not own Dexter's Laboratory or Johnny and the Sprites or Family Guy. I do not own Yahoo. I don't own SingSong2020, ExplodyThing, and ribbonhamhamgir. I don't own Voldemort. I don't own invaderzimfannumber1 and -Aneera-. I don't own Stewie. I don't own Billy. I don't own Brian, Stewie's dog. I don't own the name George Clooney. I don't own the name Peter Griffin. I don't own Aneera or Leela. I don't own Vir or Feather. I don't own Natalie and Bob. I don't own Rihanna. I don't own Planet Irk. I don't own the Money Song. I don't own George Lopez. I don't own Britney Spears or Michael Jackson. I don't own Hannah Montana. I don't own eBay. I don't own Edward Cullen and Chucky.**

**NOTE: Yes, "Breaking Wind" (the book that Jessie was reading) is a spin off of a REAL book "Breaking Dawn," which happens to be the last book of the "Twilight" Saga. I don't own Breaking Dawn or Twilight or the Twilight Saga.**

**I own Febreze (the robot), Brown Chris (robot), Mandy (robot), Utah and Dakota (robot), Brian (robot), Mr. Man (robot), and D 3000 (robot) because I made the characters up. I own BOB (Dib's buddy). I own Jessie McCartney and Jesse. I own Planet WollyWood. I own the Kajolica Hotel.**

**For the people who has their characters in my story, if you would like you can PM me about what song they would like their characters to sing for the next round. I feel lazy most of the time. But you don't have to.**

**FUN FACT: Chapter 6 (document format) was 10,690 words (including this sentence).  
Chapter 6 (story format) was 10,683 words (including this sentence).**

**Glitch? DUN DUN DUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUN!  
**


	7. Coolinator

**Irken Idol Chapter 7. Rated T for every other reason in the previous chapters and for so much romantic drama. DRAMA! Oh and explicit lyrics, too.  
NOTE: I can't handle it anymore. The formatting of my documents are not the way I want it when I post it on FanFiction. So now, whenever you see lyrics to a song, it won't be centered anymore. So, whenever you see "XXX" that's when you know a song is coming up.**

**Irken Idol  
Chapter 7: The Cool-inator**

Setting: Outside, at night  
-Nicole and Danicka were walking and following the giant gorilla's footprints.

**Danicka. **Why are we following giant gorilla's footprints?

**Nicole.** Because a certain somebody got kidnapped for no reason.

**Danicka. **WHO?!?!!?!!

**Nicole. **You'll see.

**Danicka. **I hate secrets.

**Nicole.** Well the secrets hate you.

-They kept following the footprints. They smelled like bananas.  
It's been 2 hours since they were following the footprints.

**Nicole. **THERE!!! That's where the footprints lead to!!

**Random Singing People**. DOOFENSCHMIRTZ EVIL INCORPORATED!!!

**Danicka**. Dr. DOOFENSCHMIRTZ?!

**Nicole**. YEP!!!

-They go in Doofenschmirtz Evil Inc.

* * *

Setting: Doofenschmirtz Evil Inc.

-INSIDE THE DOOFENSCHMIRTZ BUILDING...

-The place looks like it's in a volcano. It's surrounded by lava. There's lava everywhere. Why is the place covered in lava?? I don't know. You see Dr. Doofenschmirtz in front of a giant screen; it's like a transmitter thing so he can contact whoever he's contacting...Then there's a giant cage behind him, too. What's in it??

**Dr. Doofenschmirtz. **My EVIL plan is to conquer the TRI-STATE area by having this GIANT GORILLA steal everybody in town, have them beg for MERCY and watch them BOW DOWN to my POWER!!

**Zim. **ZIM DOES NOT CARE!!

-Zim is locked in a TOTALLY indestructible cage.

**Dr. Doofenschmirtz. **Hey you should not interrupt me like that. Now say sorry.

**Zim. **NEVER!!

-Zim struggles to break the cage's bars but had no effort.

**Dr. Doofenschmirtz. **YOU CAN'T BREAK FREE OF IT because THE CAGE IS STRONG because of my MAKE-MYSELF-STRONGINATOR-INATOR!!

-Pulls out a strength laser gun.

**Zim. **What's that?

**Dr. Doofenschmirtz. **IT'S MY MAKE-MYSELF-STRONGINATOR-INATOR!!

**Zim. **YOU DIDN'T STEAL EVERYBODY IN TOWN!! YOU ONLY STOLE ME!!! AND ONCE I ESCAPE YOU WILL RUE THIS DAYY!!! RUEEE! And besides, we're not in the tri-state area. We're in WOLLYWOOD!!

**Dr. Doofenschmirtz. **Really? Well, I don't think you know that I know that you know that I know that you're annoying me right now. No offense, but your voice just makes me mad. But not mad enough whenever I see or hear Perry the Platypus. Since he's not here right now (looks at his watch), oh my gosh I put my watch backwards. Hold on.

-Doofenschmirtz takes off his watch and puts it on his wrist the right way.

**Dr. Doofenschmirtz. **There you go. Where were we now? OH yeah. Whenever I have rage, I'm really evil. So that's why I listen to the Katy Perry radio station, because her name is PERRY and Perry the Platypus is... well... PERRY and her songs make me mad.

-He turns on the radio.

**Radio. **Now here's Katy Perry's Thinking of You.

-Radio starts singing.

**Zim. **WHO IS THIS KATY PERRY?? And WHY IS SHE THINKING OF ME?!

**Doofenschmirtz. **See?? It drives you insane, too, doesn't it?? It took me a while too but I found out that she's not thinking of me. It's just her new hit single!!

**Zim. **WHY IS HER NEW HIT SINGLE THINKING OF ME?!

-Radio keeps singing.

**Zim.** AH! I'm so mad!! I THINK I'LL ACTUALLY BREAK through the bars!

-Zim runs straight to the cage bar head first and hurts himself.

**Zim. **OUCH.

-Then, Doofenschmirtz was ordering his Giant Gorilla to kidnap more people of the "Tri-State Area."  
-Meanwhile, Nicole and Danicka were hiding behind a rock.

**Danicka. **What a big rock to fit both of us.

**Nicole. **COOL. Uh I mean... do you have a plan??

**Danicka. **ACTUALLY YES! I do!!

-She starts to whisper.

**Danicka. **And that's OUR PLAN!

**Nicole. **What? I don't understand.

**Danicka. **What are you talking about?

**Nicole. **All you said was our plan.

**Danicka. **I KNOW.

**Nicole. **No, you literally said "our plan."

**Danicka. **Well YOU got any other ideas?

**Nicole. **MHM....

-While Nicole brainstorms their plan, AGENT P comes in out of nowhere to face DR. DOOFENSCHMIRTZ!

**Random Singing People. **AGENT P!!!

**Dr. Doofenschmirtz. **Ah. Perry the Platypus you are late. Let me tell you my plan. My plan is to use my evil giant gorilla to capture the people of the TRI-STATE area and have them all bow down to me!!

-A/N: I guess I made Dr. Doofenschmirtz too much like Zim... Oh well!  
-Dr. Doofenschmirtz gets tapped on his shoulder.

**Dr. Doofenschmirtz. **WHAT-HEY! I was telling my plan. You know, that's rude. You cannot interrupt me while I am discussing my-HEY!! AGAIN!! How'd you get out of the cage?!

**Zim. **The cage was open....

-He points to the wide open cage....

**Dr. Doofenschmirtz. **I really should have locked that...

-Then, PERRY attacks Dr. Doofenschmirtz!! Zim does, too.  
Nicole and Danicka are just watching.

**Danicka. **SHOULDN'T WE HELP THEM??

**Nicole. **Nahh....

-Zim quickly takes the MAKE-MYSELF-STRONGINATOR-INATOR and ZAPS HIMSELF! He gets all BUFF!

**Dr. Doofenschmirtz. **OH MY GOSH! YOU WENT ALL BUFF!

-HOORAY!  
-Zim and Perry start to fight Dr. Doofenschmirtz. Zim took the last blow and punched him out of his own building.

-Dr. Doofenschmirtz went flying so far and fast all the way back to Earth.

**Dr. Doofenschmirtz. **CURSE YOU PERRY THE PLATYPUS!! AND INVADER ZIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIM!

**Zim. **Victory!!!!!!!!!!!!

-Perry disappeared! WHERE DID HE GO???

**Nicole. **Okay Zim you had your fun now let's go back.

**Zim. **HEY where did you come from, STALKER?!

**Danicka. **We watched the whole thing. We didn't feel like helping...

**Zim. **ZIM NEEDS NO HELP! I AM VICTORIOUS!!! I AM SUPERIOR, revolting Earth worms.

**Nicole. **I'm a human...

**Zim. **Exactly!!!!! I have no need of walking with you two.

-Zim uses his spider legs and... Crawls away? We'll say RUNS away....

**Danicka. **Did he just ditch us?

**Nicole. **Yeah...

* * *

Setting: KAJOLICA HOTEL - LOBBY  
-By the time they got back to the hotel, it was already like seven in the morning. Everyone was at breakfast...  
-No one cared about what happened to Zim so it was like an ordinary morning...Everyone had food... wow.... I'm hungry.

-Everyone was talking about their song.

**Stewie. **Okay what do you think we should sing?

**Brian. **Let's sing Kanye West.

**Stewie. **That's SURE to get the judges. We should sing "Never Gonna Give You Up."

**Brian. **That song's by a gay guy and I already sang that before. It's pretty gay.

**Stewie. **Well I'm not gay.

**Brian. **Neither am I.

**Stewie. **Do you think Hitler was gay?

**Brian. **I don't know.

OMG!

**Dib. **What should we sing, Bob??

**Bob. **I don't know.

**Gaz. **These waffles are horrible.

**Dib. **Wait, when we sing, where do you go?

**Gaz.** I go in the audience like everybody else...

**Dib. **Ohh...

**Gaz. **You're so stupid with your big head.

**Bob. **Ah... I still don't know!!

**Dib. **This is harder than I thought...

OMG!

**Natalie. **I KNOW WHAT TO SING!!

**Bob. **REALLY?!

**Natalie. **YEAH!!

**Natalie and Bob. **HOORAY!!!!!!!!!!!

-They turn on the disco and the lights in the whole room went dark and they started partying.

OMG!

**Amethyst. **WHERE DID THE DISCO COME FROM???

**Kierra. **I DON'T KNOW!

**Amethyst. **I was thinking about wardrobe. I so TOTALLY need new clothes.

**Kierra. **What kind of clothes??

**Amethyst. **Do you think I should go for formal? Or like rock-ish like Hannah Montana? Or all MORE rock-ish like KISS?

**Kierra. **Do MORE rock-ish like KISS :)

**Amethyst. **Ew. I'll just do Hannah Montana kind then.

**Kierra. **Thanks for asking.

-A/N: I'm not good at fashion or Amethyst's kind of taste, so BARE WITH ME invaderzimfannumber1!

OMG!

**Aneera. **I KNOW WHAT TO SING!

**Leela. **ME TOO!!

**Aneera. **YAY!! LET'S HAVE CAKE!!

**Leela. **YAY!!

OMG!

**Sam and Peter Griffin. **I KNOW WHAT TO SING!

**Sam. **We should sing-(her talking becomes indistinct).

**Peter Griffin. **Oh I was thinking we can sing Decode...

**Sam. **Oh YEAH! Oh well.

**Peter Griffin. **Are we singing Decode or-(his talking becomes indistinct).

**Sam. **We're singing -- (indistinct talking) -- because I thought up all the moves already...

**Peter Griffin. **We're gonna dance?!

**Sam. **YEAH! We're gonna be like AWESOME.

OMG!

**Mimi. **We can sing-(indistinct talking... again).

**Tak. **That's great but we'll look retarded.

**Mimi. **SO?! It will help A LOT! Besides, if we dance to it, we can WIN too.

**Tak. **Oh great idea... :)

**Mimi. **Wait are we gonna have to wear the clothes-

**Tak. **Yes. It will truly affect the judges and the audience if we did this perfectly.

**Mimi. **It's gonna be embarrassing-!

**Tak. **AND WORTH IT!

**MIMI. **They'll never let us live it down!

**Tak. **Then we'll kill them with the death machine that we're gonna win.

OMG!

**Jessie. **Can you sing this song for Dib for me?

**Jesse. **Why? Girls sing that.

**Jessie. **Just say it's from me.

**Jesse. **Why can't YOU sing it?

**Jessie. **Because the robots are the lead singers and (points straight at Jesse) ROBOT!

**Jesse. **Okay whatever.

-A/N: For those people who are slow, the part where I saw OMG! Is when we change from one conversation to another.  
Okay I don't feel like doing every other conversation so let's just skip to the contest. The CLIMAX of the chapter. YAY!

SPOILER!  
-Note: The songs I put might be old, like Paper Planes. This is considered a spoiler because someone is gonna sing that. :)

* * *

Setting: Irken Idol!! YAY!  
-Everybody was backstage in their costumes or clothes.  
-On stage, the host of the show comes up. Everybody in the giant audience starts to cheer.

**John Tartaglia. **Hello guys and welcome back to Irken Idol! It's the SECOND round! You guys get to pick/vote on who stays and who leaves. The people with the least votes go to the BOTTOM THREE!

**John Tartaglia. **Okay first up is TAK and her robot, MIMI!

-Tak and Mimi go on stage. People start cheering.  
-What were they wearing? They're wearing the same clothes that the people wore in the music video. Research it yourself [:

**Tak. **Ready?

**Mimi. **These are the weirdest clothes I'm EVER gonna wear in my life.

**Tak. **Remember the steps?

**Mimi. **Yep.

XXX

Music Starts Playing  
_Tak and Mimi start dancing..._  
**Mimi. **All the single ladies (**Tak. **All the single ladies)  
**Mimi. **All the single ladies (**Tak. **All the single ladies)  
**Mimi. **All the single ladies (**Tak. **All the single ladies)  
**Mimi. **All the single ladies  
now put your hands up

**Mimi. **Up in the club, we just broke up  
I'm doing my own little thing  
you Decided to dip but now you want to trip  
Cuz another brother noticed me  
I'm up on him, he up on me  
don't pay him any attention  
cuz I cried my tears, for three good years  
Ya can't be mad at me

**Mimi and Tak. **Cuz if you liked it then you should have put a ring on it  
If you liked it then you shoulda put a ring on it  
Don't be mad once you see that he want it  
If you liked it then you shoulda put a ring on it

**Mimi. **wo oh ooh oh oh ooh oh oh ooh oh oh oh  
**Tak. **wo oh ooh oh oh ooh oh oh ooh oh oh oh

**Mimi and Tak. **Cuz if you liked it then you should have put a ring on it  
If you liked it then you shoulda put a ring on it  
Don't be mad once you see that he want it  
If you liked it then you shoulda put a ring on it

**Mimi. **I got gloss on my lips, a man on my hips  
hold me tighter than my Dereon jeans  
acting up, drink in my cup  
I could care less what you think  
I need no permission, did I mention  
Don't pay him any attention  
Cuz you had your turn  
But now you gonna learn  
What it really feels like to miss me

**Mimi and Tak. **Cuz if you liked it then you should have put a ring on it  
If you liked it then you shoulda put a ring on it  
Don't be mad once you see that he want it  
If you liked it then you shoulda put a ring on it

**Mimi. **woo oh ooh oh oh ooh oh oh ooh oh oh oh  
**Tak. **woo oh ooh oh oh ooh oh oh ooh oh oh oh

**Mimi and Tak. **Cuz if you liked it then you should have put a ring on it  
If you liked it then you shoulda put a ring on it  
Don't be mad once you see that he want it  
If you liked it then you shoulda put a ring on it

**Mimi. **woo oh ooh oh oh ooh oh oh ooh oh oh oh  
woo oh ooh oh oh ooh oh oh ooh oh oh oh

**Tak. **Don't treat me to the things of this world  
I'm not that kind of girl  
Your love is what I prefer, what I deserve  
Is a man that makes me, then takes me  
And delivers me to destiny, to infinity and beyond  
Pull me into your arms  
Say I'm the one you own  
If you don't, you'll be alone  
And like a ghost I'll be gone

**Mimi. **All the single ladies (**Tak. **All the single ladies)  
**Mimi. **All the single ladies (**Tak. **All the single ladies)  
**Mimi. **All the single ladies (**Tak. **All the single ladies)  
**Mimi. **All the single ladies  
Now put your hands up

**Mimi. **woo oh ooh oh oh ooh oh oh ooh oh oh oh  
**Tak. **woo oh ooh oh oh ooh oh oh ooh oh oh oh

(**Tak. **woo oh ooh)  
**Mimi and Tak. **Cuz if you liked it then you should have put a ring on it  
If you liked it then you shoulda put a ring on it  
Don't be mad once you see that he want it  
If you liked it then you shoulda put a ring on it

(**Tak. **woo oh ooh)  
**Mimi and Tak. **Cuz if you liked it then you should have put a ring on it  
If you liked it then you shoulda put a ring on it  
Don't be mad once you see that he want it  
If you liked it then you shoulda put a ring on it  
(**Tak. **woo oh ooh)  
Music ENDS.  
_Song was All the Single Ladies (Put a Ring on It) by Beyonce._

XXX

-Everyone cheers.  
-The judges look surprised. Like a WOW surprised.

**Danicka. **(Speechless)

**Nicole. **WOW!! I LOVE THAT SONG!

**Danicka. **You love EVERY song.

**Voldemort. **I don't know what to say... literally.

**Nicole. **Okay then I'll say something. I SERIOUSLY LOVE THAT SONG and OH MY GOD YOU DID THE DANCE!

**Danicka. **Hah.

**Voldemort. **Your clothes are whoa...

**Danicka. **(Still speechless)

**Voldemort. **Your singing was great. Your clothes are whoa. Why did you wear that?? Other than that your dancing was UTTERLY AMAZING.

**Nicole. **I KNOW! You seriously did the dance better than I did. It's like HARD. You should be in "Dancing with the Gays!" (A/N: That is gonna be part of another story someday).

**Danicka. **I guess it's my turn to speak. It's like WOW.

**John Tartaglia. **Okay I guess we're done with the judging...But remember! It's not the judges' opinion that matters! It's the audience! Call 1-800-TAK or 1-800-MIMI to vote for them. Again it's 1-800-TAK or 1-800-MIMI.

-A/N: I have no imagination when it comes to making up phone numbers.

**John Tartaglia. **Next up we have STEWIE AND BRIAN!

-Stewie and Brian come out on stage.

**Danicka. **Isn't Brian a dog? I thought they're supposed to be robots.

**Nicole. **He IS a robot. Stewie told me.

**Danicka. **Of course he did. He's in the competition.

XXX

Music Starts Playing  
**Brian and Stewie. **In the night I hear 'em talk,  
The coldest story ever told,  
Somewhere far along this road  
He lost his soul  
To a woman so heartless...  
How could you be so heartless... oh  
How could you be so heartless?

**Brian. **How could you be so,  
Cold as the winter wind when it breeze yo  
Just remember that you talking to me though  
You need to watch the way you talking to me yo  
I mean after all the things that we been through  
I mean after all the things we got into  
And yo I know of some things that you ain't told me  
And yo I did some things but that's the old me  
And now you wanna get me back  
And you gon' show me  
So you walk around like you don't know me  
You got a new friend  
Well I got homies  
But in the end it's still so lonely

**Stewie and Brian. **In the night I hear 'em talk,  
The coldest story ever told,  
Somewhere far along this road  
He lost his soul  
To a woman so heartless...  
How could you be so heartless... oh  
How could you be so heartless?

**Brian. **How could you be so Dr. Evil  
You're bringing out a side of me that I don't know  
I decided we weren't gonna speak so why we up 3 a.m. on the phone  
Why does she be so mad at me for, homie I don't know she's hot and cold  
I won't stop, won't mess my groove up cause I already know how this thing goes,  
You run and tell your friends that you're leavin' me  
They say that they don't see what you see in me  
You wait a couple months then you gon' see,  
You'll never find nobody better than me

**Stewie and Brian. **In the night I hear 'em talk,  
The coldest story ever told,  
Somewhere far along this road  
He lost his soul  
To a woman so heartless...  
How could you be so heartless... oh  
How could you be so heartless?

**Stewie. **Talkin', talkin', talkin', talk,  
Baby lets just knock it off  
They don't know what we been through  
They don't know 'bout me and you  
So I got something new to see  
And you just gon' keep hatin' me  
And we just gon' be enemies  
I know you can't believe  
I could just leave it wrong  
and you can't make it right  
I'm gon' take off tonight  
In to the night...

**Brian and Stewie. **In the night I hear 'em talk,  
The coldest story ever told,  
Somewhere far along this road  
He lost his soul  
To a woman so heartless...  
How could you be so heartless... oh  
How could you be so heartless?  
How could you be so heartless?  
Music ENDS.  
_Song was Heartless by Kanye West. _

XXX

-People cheer. (Of course they cheer).

**Nicole. **I -

**Danicka. **- Love that song. We know, Nicole.

**Nicole. **Mhm.

**Danicka. **I thought that song was annoying but Nicole kept playing that song over and over again at home. I got used to that song and now I think it's catchy. YAY!

**Nicole. **Yeah! I know that's what happened to me, except it was on the radio when I heard it!

**Voldemort. **I think that song is repulsive. Your rapping was horrible. I hate it all.

-Audience goes BOO!

**Stewie. **YOU'RE GAY!

-They walk off stage.

**Brian. **He IS gay.

**Stewie. **Yeah I know.

OMG!

**Danicka. **Voldemort, are you really gay?

**Voldemort. **NO!!

**Nicole. **I think he's bi.

**Voldemort. **I HEARD THAT!

**John Tartaglia. **Okay well. If you wanted to vote for Stewie and Brian, it's 1-800-STEWIE or 1-800-BRIAN. Whichever. Next one is Utah and Dakota!

**Danicka. **Who are they?

**Nicole. **It's the Vortian and her robot. I told you this stuff.

**Danicka. **Well you barely mention him so yeah.

**Nicole. **Okay in case you don't know, Utah and Dakota are girls.

**Danicka. **But Dakota's a robot.

**Nicole. **She's a GIRL robot.

XXX

Music Starts Playing  
_[x2] _  
**Dakota. **I fly like paper, get high like planes  
If you catch me at the border I got visas in my name  
If you come around here, I make 'em all day  
I get one down in a second if you wait

_[x2]_  
**Dakota. **Sometimes I think sitting on trains  
Every stop I get to I'm clocking that game  
Everyone's a winner, we're making our fame  
Bonafide hustler making my name

_[x4]_  
**Utah**** and Dakota. **All I wanna do is (BANG BANG BANG BANG!)  
And (KKKAAAA CHING!)  
And take your money

_[x2] _  
**Dakota. **Pirate skulls and bones  
Sticks and stones and weed and bongs  
Running when we hit 'em  
Lethal poison through their system

_[x2] _  
**Dakota. **No one on the corner has swagger like us  
Hit me on my Burner prepaid wireless  
We pack and deliver like UPS trucks  
Already going hell just pumping that gas

_[x4]_  
**Utah**** and Dakota. **All I wanna do is (BANG BANG BANG BANG!)  
And (KKKAAAA CHING!)  
And take your money

**Utah****. **M.I.A.  
Third world democracy  
Yeah, I got more records than the K.G.B.  
So, uh, no funny business

**Dakota. **Some some some I some I murder  
Some I some I let go  
Some some some I some I murder  
Some I some I let go

_[x4]_  
**Utah**** and Dakota. **All I wanna do is (BANG BANG BANG BANG!)  
And (KKKAAAA CHING!)  
And take your money  
Music ENDS.  
_Song was Paper Planes by MIA._

XXX

**Nicole. **That song is awesome!

**Danicka. **Yep! I think it's catchy.

**Voldemort. **Let ME provide the REAL judging. I can't really tell if you sing well because the song isn't the kind of song to sing if you want to show off your voice. Also, I think this song is a way to hypnotize children into taking drugs and killing others.

**Nicole. **I have to agree with Voldemort on this one. Except for the hypnotizing part. I THOUGHT it was supposed to hypnotize others, but it's really a song for this other movie.

**Danicka. **YEP.

**Voldemort. **It's about time you guys thought about the real details. Anyway, choose a better song next time.

**John Tartaglia. **WOW this is NOT a good sign! Will they STAY? It's up to you! Dial 1-800-UTAH. It's 1-800-UTAH. NEXT IS DIB AND BOB!

-People scream in a way you say girls do in those Jonas Brothers concerts. Wow how many Dib fan girls are there in the audience??  
-Dib and Bob run to stage. MORE SCREAMING.

**Nicole. **Ohmygod so much screaming.

**Danicka. **I know like GOSH. And no one likes him back on Earth.

**Nicole. **Funny how that works.

XXX

Music Starts Playing  
**Bob. **You were young, and so am I  
This is wrong, but who am I to judge?  
I feel like heaven when we touch  
I guess, for me this is enough

**Dib and Bob. **We're one mistake for being together  
Lets not ask why it's not right  
You won't be seventeen forever  
And we can get away with this tonight

**Bob. **You are young, and I am scared  
You're wise beyond your years, but I don't care  
And I can feel your heartbeat  
You know exactly where to take me

**Dib and Bob. **We're one mistake from being together  
Let's not ask why it's not right  
You won't be seventeen forever  
And we can get away with this tonight

(**Dib. **Ooh...Ooh...)

**Dib. **Will you remember me?  
You ask me as I leave  
Remember what I said?  
Oh how could I, oh how could I forget

**Dib and Bob. **We're one mistake from being together  
Let's not ask why it's not right  
You won't be seventeen forever  
And we can get away with this tonight

**Dib and Bob. **We're one mistake from being together  
Let's not ask why it's not right  
You won't be seventeen forever  
And we can get away with this tonight

**Dib and Bob. **We're one mistake from being together  
Let's not ask why it's not right  
You won't be seventeen forever  
And we can get away with this tonight

Music ENDS.  
_Song was Seventeen Forever by Metro Station._

XXX

-More people screaming.

**Nicole. **OH MY GOD I LOVE THAT SONG SO MUCH!!

**Danicka. **Me too, but not as much as Nicole. I like Fall For You (by Secondhand Serenade) the best.

**Nicole. **I always thought that song was from Twilight but it's not.

**Danicka. **Why?

**Nicole. **Come on. Let's hug.

-They both hug.

**Voldemort. **Okay... you guys sang good-

**Danicka. **THEY SANG GREAT.

**John Tartaglia. **You guys get to vote. 1-800-DIB or 1-800-BOB.

**Nicole. **I like food.

**John Tartaglia. **Next are Sam and PETER GRIFFIN!

-Everyone cheers.  
-Sam and Peter Griffin go on stage.

**Sam. **(to the audience) Uhm... we're gonna sing a song!

**Peter. **YEP!

XXX

Music Starts Playing  
_Sam and Peter Griffin start dancing.  
_**Sam and Peter. **Oh oh oh oh oh

**Peter. **There will be no rules tonight  
If there were we'd break 'em  
Nothing's gonna stop us now  
Let's get down to it  
Nervous hands and anxious smiles  
I can feel you breathing  
This is right where we belong  
Turn up the music

**Sam. **Oh oh oh oh oh

**Sam and Peter. **This is the dance for all the lovers  
Takin' a chance for one another  
Finally it's our time now  
These are the times that we'll remember  
Breaking the city's heart together  
Finally it's our time now  
It's our time now

**Peter. **This is more than just romance  
It's an endless summer  
I can feel the butterflies, leading me through it  
Take my heart, I'll take your hand  
As we're falling under  
This is an addiction girl  
Let's give in to it

**Sam. **Oh oh oh oh oh

**Sam and Peter. **This is the dance for all the lovers  
Takin' a chance for one another  
Finally it's our time now  
These are the times that we'll remember  
Breaking the city's heart together  
Finally it's our time now  
It's our time now

**Sam. **Oh oh oh oh oh  
Oh oh oh oh oh  
Now  
It's a dance  
Get up  
Come on brothers  
Oh oh oh oh oh  
Oh oh oh oh oh  
Oh oh oh oh oh

**Sam and Peter. **This is the dance for all the lovers  
Takin' a chance for one another  
Finally it's our time now  
These are the times that we'll remember  
Breaking the city's heart together  
Finally it's our time now  
It's our time now  
(It's our time now)  
It's our time now  
(It's our time now)  
Oh oh oh oh oh  
Oh oh oh oh oh  
Finally it's our time now  
Music ENDS.  
_Song was Our Time Now by Plain White T's._

XXX

**Danicka. **Wasn't that song from iCarly?

**Nicole. **YEP!

**Voldemort. **Peter Griffin, you are a GOOD SINGER. Nice robot you got there, Sam.

**Sam. **YAY!

**Voldemort. **Nice dancing, too.

**Peter Griffin. **YAY!!!!!!  
**  
Sam. **YAY!!!!!! I'M SO HAPPY!

**John Tartaglia. **To vote, call 1-800-SAM or 1-800-PETER.

**Sam. **YES! VOTE FOR US!! NOW!!!!!

**Peter. **Come on let's go. They got tacos backstage.

**Sam. **TACOS!

-They run off.

**Nicole. **I want tacos!

-Nicole runs backstage, too.

**Voldemort. **Aren't you gonna run?

**Danicka. **I don't like tacos.

-A/N: WELL THE TACOS DON'T LIKE YOU!

**John Tartaglia. **Next are Jessie McCartney and her robot Jesse.

-More people cheering.

**Audience. **JESSIE! JESSIE! JESSIE!

**Voldemort. **They like her.

**Danicka. **She's like our version of Hannah Montana.

**Voldemort. **You like Hannah Montana?

**Danicka. **Just like a little. Nicole doesn't like her very much.

**Voldemort. **Why?

**Danicka. **She doesn't like Miley Cyrus. She likes Selena Gomez more.

**Voldemort. **Whatever.

**Jessie McCartney. **I know my little buddy, Jesse, is supposed to sing. But I want him to sing this song. It's dedicated to my man, DIB!

XXX

Music Starts Playing  
**Jesse. **Guess this means you're sorry  
You're standing at my door  
Guess this means you take back  
All you said before  
Like how much you wanted  
Anyone but me  
Said you'd never come back  
But here you are again

**Jessie and Jesse. **Cuz we belong together now, yeah  
Forever united here somehow, yeah  
You got a piece of me  
And honestly  
My life (my life) would suck (would suck) without you

**Jesse. **Maybe I was stupid  
For telling you goodbye  
Maybe I was wrong  
For tryin' to pick a fight  
I know that I've got issues  
But you're pretty messed up too  
Either way I found out I'm nothing without you

* * *

Setting: Backstage**  
Dib. **Oh my god, she's singing a song for me. Well, she got Jesse to sing a song for me.

**Zim. **She's stupid to date you.

**Dib. **It's not like YOU had a girlfriend.

**Zim. **I'M NOT GONNA HAVE ONE. Love is gay. I'm not gay. You are.

**Stewie. **Voldemort's gay, too.

**Zim. **No I heard he was bi.

**Dib. **I bet you don't even know what bi means.

**Tak. **Your relationship with Jessie will die off and fade away to be forgotten forever.

**Dib. **Why?

**Tak. **She writes in her "little diary." She's only going out with you because she feels sorry. She KNOWS who you are and she hates it. She just wants to make you feel better but in truth, she's not feeling so great herself. She said you're "boring" and that you talk too much about paranormal stuff and that she likes Edward Cullen better AND that on Valentine's Day she's gonna break up with you in front of everyone just to humiliate you.

**Dib. **(feels heartbroken) What?

**Tak. **It's true. This is ALL an act.

**Dib. **No. It... it can't be.

**Tak. **But it is.

**Dib. **How would you know? You read her "little diary?"

**Tak. **She's in the same hotel room as us. I felt bored so I read it. But it's best that you know before she breaks up with you in the most humiliating way possible.

**Dib. **Why... why would you care?

**Tak. **It's for the best.

OMG!

-Tak walks away.  
-Amethyst walks up to her.

**Amethyst. **That's not true. What you said about Jessie. She really likes him.

**Tak. **I know. I only said that to get Dib to break up with her first. I want to see her break down.

**Amethyst. **Wait, so it's not true? She REALLY likes him? Wow I only said that stuff 'cuz I didn't know what to say. You made that diary stuff up?

**Tak. **Yeah. Well not really. She did write it. She IS only doing it because she felt sorry. EVERYTHING I said was true EXCEPT the part where she says he's boring and that she likes Edward Cullen. She actually likes Jasper better, but she also said that she likes Dib the best. She also wrote that, "Dib turned out to be the best guy I ever met." Gosh.

**Amethyst. **Okay, Tak, normally I'd laugh at this moment but that's cruel and low, even for you.

**Tak. **Why? Do you wanna hear Jessie go on and on about how "wonderful" your archenemy is?

**Amethyst. **Where are you going with this?

**Tak. **Just think about it. Dib will be MISERABLE.

**Amethyst. **Okay so I change my mind. Let's TORTURE THEM!

**Tak. **Now we're on the same page.

-OH MY GOD THEY WENT EVIL!

OMG!

**Dib. **So our love was just a... lie?

**Zim. **It's true. She hates you. NOW CRY! CRY LIKE YOU NEVER CRIED.... BEFORE!

**Dib. **Zim, I don't have time for this.

-He walks away.

**Zim. **Love is just a way to get ourselves distracted from our purpose in life.

***ZIM. **How would you know? You've never been in love.

(REMINDER: *ZIM is Amethyst's dad.)

**Zim. **Zim!!! I FORGOT ABOUT YOU!

***Zim. **So did Nicole.

**Zim. **What?

***Zim. **That's a whole different story.

**Zim. **Okay?? Why would I wanna be in love?

***Zim. **It's great. You would feel like nothing before.

**Zim. **Ask me if I care.

***Zim. **Do you care?

**Zim. **No.

***Zim. **(Completely ignores him) I remember Crystal. She was... wonderful.

**Zim. **CRYSTAL??

***Zim. **My girlfriend...Why?? Is there a problem??

**Zim. **Why are people from your dimension named after jewels?

***Zim. **...

**Zim. **and... GIRLFRIEND?? I was right;; you DID come from a messed up universe. WHAT IS THIS?? What'd you and Crystal do to get a daughter? HUH?? I've heard of alien breeding before but that's just DISGUSTING!! And worse, you guys came up with a horrible filthy worm baby that actually believes she's half Irken half WHATEVER!!

***Zim. **SHE'S HALF UTOPIAN!!

**Zim. **That's the dumbest alien race name I've ever heard of.

***Zim. **And... alien breeding? I... uhh never did that (IN MIND: That would be pretty awesome though.)

-A/N: HAH! PERVERT!

***Zim. **Crystal sent her from the future. And she's not a worm baby!! HUMANS ARE!!

**Zim. **Exactly.

***Zim. **ARE YOU SAYING MY DAUGHTER IS AS REVOLTING AS A USELESS MONKEY HUMAN???

**Zim. **YEAH!! OR MAYBE SHE IS HUMAN!!

***Zim. **(gasp!) You DARE call her a human???

-Aneera comes in.

**Aneera. **What's going on here??

***Zim. **Stay away from this!!

**Zim. **YEAH!! ...You look like an Irken. Why aren't your antennae curled in a weird way like those females??

***Zim. **Haha!! Maybe she's not a female!! Maybe she's a gay guy!!

**Zim. **HAHA!! Or maybe she's a shemale!!

***Zim. **Huh??

**Zim. **It's when you get a transplant;; human females do it, too.

***Zim. **How--?

**Zim. **Don't ask how I know this stuff.

**Aneera. **OH SHUT UP!!!

***Zim. **Ohh wow I'm SO scared.

**Aneera. **JUST SHUT IT!! I'M HALF DRAGON, TOO!!

**Zim. **OH ANOTHER HALF!!! Seriously, what do authors come up with these days??

***Zim. **Zim, shut up. Seriously. Amethyst is a one of a kind!! She has super powers!!

**Aneera. **And I have dragon powers!!

**Zim. **Oh what else? Edward and Bella from that Twilight sh--(censored) have a half stink-human half vampire pig baby??

-Sam comes out of nowhere.

**Sam. **Actually... they do. They named her Renesmee. She's got special mind freaky powers. GAHH!! I hate halfs;; Most of all I hate Renesmee. I WANNA SHOOT HER!!

-Nicole comes in.

**Nicole. **Haha say that in front of Bella. She's gonna be all mad and stuff. Mothers like her are soo protective...

**Zim. **You mean like *Zim??

***Zim. **She said "mothers."

**Zim. **I know.

... THE HATE AND ANGER GROWS BETWEEN ZIM AND *ZIM.  
-Then, from out of nowhere, *Zim attacks Zim!  
-Aneera was fairly mad at both *Zim and Zim so she turned into a dragon and started attacking them both.  
-A cartoon fight cloud forms.

-Feather and Natalie comes in.

**Natalie. **YAY!! A FIGHT!! That's pretty awesome.

**Nicole. **YEAH!! I KNOW!!

**Feather. **Who's fighting who?

**Sam. ***Zim against Zim and Aneera against both of them.

**Natalie. **Let's go eat tacos again.

-They all leave to the snack table.

OMG!

**Nicole. **(Eating a taco) I LOVE TACOS.

**Sam. **Me, too.

**Feather and Aneera. **Can we eat with you guys?

**Sam. **SURE!

**Natalie. **Oh TACOS! I LOVE TACOS!

-They all join Nicole and Sam in the eating of the tacos.  
-Zim comes up to them looking completely beat up.

**Zim. **Look at you guys. Eating tacos. PATHETIC!

**Nicole. **So are you.

**Zim. **What about you, huh? SHOULDN'T YOU BE JUDGING??

**Nicole. **I am. So far, I love the song. I think it's sweet she dedicated the song to Dib.

-Zim looks at Tak and Amethyst sitting together, quietly.  
-They look like they're... talking?? To each other?? In a non-violent way??

-Zim went suspicious. What are they talking about??

**Zim. **Something's fishy.

**Nicole. **Ooh I like fish.

**Feather. **What do you mean?

**Zim. **Tak and Amethyst are doing something.

**Aneera. **And you care why??

**Zim. **Because I know they're doing something EVIL and I'm not part of it!

**Sam. **Why don't you just make up your own plan?

**Zim. **OH yeah.

-Zim leaves.

**Nicole. **I really got to go back to judging or I'll get fired. BYE!

-Nicole walks back to the judging table.

**Aneera. **But Nicole hired herself. Who's gonna fire her?

**Natalie. **I think she does. Well anyway,Bob and I are gonna sing an awesome song.

**Feather. **AWESOME!

-Amethyst runs across the room in a hurry with a backpack of suspicious looking things.

**Sam. **Hey Amethyst. What's the rush?

**Amethyst. **I FORGOT SOMETHING VERY IMPORTANT!!

-While Amethyst runs, a black notebook drops from her bag.

**Aneera. **Hey! You forgot your...notebook.

-As soon as she finished that sentence, Amethyst was gone.  
-Aneera looks in the notebook.

**Aneera. **Hey guys. Look what's in this.

**Natalie. **What is it?

-They all huddle around to see a very detailed illustration of what seems to be Amethyst's plan.

**Feather. **It looks like a very detailed illustration of what seems to be Amethyst's plan.

**Sam. **Oh my god. It's a plan to break Dib and Jessie up!

**Natalie. **Should we do something about it?

-They all looked at each other.

**Everybody. **NAHH.

-They continue their eating of the tacos.

* * *

Setting: On Stage  
-The audience were still cheering as Jesse sang.

**Jessie and Jesse. **Cuz we belong together now, yeah  
Forever united here somehow, yeah  
You got a piece of me  
And honestly  
My life (my life) would suck (would suck) without you

**Jessie. **Being with you is so dysfunctional  
I really shouldn't miss you,  
But I can't let you go,  
Oh yeah

**Jessie and Jesse. **Cuz we belong together now, (yeah yeah)  
Forever united here somehow, (yeah)  
You got a piece of me  
And honestly  
My life (my life) would suck (would suck) without you

**Jessie and Jesse. **Cuz we belong (yeah) together now (together now), (yeah)  
Forever united here somehow, (yeah)  
You got a piece of me  
And honestly  
My life (my life) would suck (would suck) without you  
Music ENDS.  
_Song was My Life Would Suck Without You by Kelly Clarkson.  
_  
XXX

-YAY! THE SONG ENDED!!

**John Tartaglia. **And that was Jessie and Jesse with the song! To vote for her, it's 1-800-JESSIE or 1-800-JESSE.

**Danicka. **Nicole, you're back.

**Nicole. **Yep!! I ate the most delicious tacos...

**Danicka. **Coolio. I want corn though. I don't understand why you don't like corn.

**Nicole. **I don't like a lot of produce. I like meat better. MEAT!! Seriously.

**Danicka. **I know, you don't even eat apples anymore...

**Nicole. **That's because I developed some kind of gay food allergy. I think I'm getting a food allergy to mangoes, too.

**Danicka. **But you LOVE mangoes!

**Nicole. **And it would be sad to not to be able to eat anymore.

**Danicka. **It would be really sad.

**John Tartaglia. **Next is... NATALIE AND BOB!!

-Natalie and Bob go on stage wearing... Santa hats?

**Natalie. **We're gonna sing an AWESOME song!!

**Bob. **YEAH!!

**Voldemort. **(To Nicole and Danicka) Isn't Bob Dib's robot?

**Nicole. **Well, my sister and I thought of the name Bob for Dib's buddy.

**Danicka. **Yeah and then it turns out that Natalie's robot's name is Bob, too.

**Nicole. **Small world isn't it?

XXX

Music Starts Playing  
**Bob. **Jingle bell, jingle bell, jingle bell rock  
Jingle bells swing and jingle bells ring  
Snowing and blowing up bushels of fun  
now the jingle hop has begun

**Bob. **Jingle bell, jingle bell, jingle bell rock  
Jingle bells chime in jingle bell time  
Dancing and prancing in Jingle Bell Square  
in the frosty air.

**Natalie. **What a bright time, it's the right time  
To rock the night away  
Jingle bell time is a swell time  
To go gliding in a one-horse sleigh  
Giddy-up jingle horse, pick up your feet  
Jingle around the clock

**Natalie and Bob. **Mix and a-mingle in the jingling feet  
that's the jingle bell,  
that's the jingle bell,  
that's the jingle bell rock.  
Music ENDS.  
_Song is Jingle Bell Rock by Bobby Helms._

XXX

-Everyone cheered. Wow.

**Nicole. **Isn't it past Christmas?

**Danicka. **Yeah but I love that song!!

**Nicole. **Me too. 10 out of 10

**Danicka. **9999 out of 1!!

**Voldemort. **What the f-(censored) is wrong with you guys? That's the most stupid song choice ever.

-Everyone BOOS!!!

**Natalie. **BOO!!!

**Bob. **YOU DON'T KNOW TALENT!!

**Voldemort.** But-

**Nicole. **Voldemort, WHERE IS YOUR CHRISTMAS SPIRIT?

**Danicka. **Yeah!! Christmas is a time of happiness and fun and other crap.

**Voldemort. **They-

**Nicole. **SANG GREAT!! And I love their Santa hats.

**Natalie. **THANKS!!

**Voldemort. **I'm just--never mind.

**John Tartaglia. **Voldemort looks pretty pissed right now! To vote for Natalie and Bob, it's 1-800-BOB or 1-800-NATALIE.

**Natalie. **VOTE FOR US!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! OR BOB AND I WILL SECRETLY STALK YOU GUYS BACK TO YOUR HOMES AND STUFF EVIL POTATOES DOWN YOUR THROAT WHILE YOU GO PEE!!

**Bob. **PEE!

**Nicole. **Whoa.

**Danicka. **Wow, I SO noticed that everybody's number starts with 1-800. You know... I want my wedding to be a surprise party.

**Nicole. **A surprise party?

**Danicka. **Yep!

**Nicole. **COOL!

**John Tartaglia. **Next, we have Aneera and Leela!

-Aneera and Leela go on stage.

**Aneera. **HI PEOPLE!

**Nicole. **You know she's married to Zim, right?

**Danicka. **Yeah I know. What I don't know is what happened to Noah.

**Nicole. **I... don't know. Maybe he's getting molested by Michael Jackson or something.

**Danicka. **Oh no! We have to tell her!

**Nicole. **No not yet she's gonna sing!

XXX

Music Starts Playing  
**Leela. **Seems like just yesterday  
You were a part of me  
I used to stand so tall  
I used to be so strong  
Your arms around me tight  
Everything, it felt so right  
Unbreakable, like nothin' could go wrong  
Now I can't breathe  
No, I can't sleep  
I'm barely hanging on

**Aneera and Leela. **Here I am, once again  
I'm torn into pieces  
Can't deny it, can't pretend  
Just thought you were the one  
Broken up, deep inside  
But you won't get to see the tears I cry  
Behind these hazel eyes

**Leela. **I told you everything  
Opened up and let you in  
You made me feel alright  
For once in my life  
Now all that's left of me  
Is what I pretend to be  
So together, but so broken up inside  
'Cause I can't breathe  
No, I can't sleep  
I'm barely hangin' on

**Aneera and Leela. **Here I am, once again  
I'm torn into pieces  
Can't deny it, can't pretend  
Just thought you were the one  
Broken up, deep inside  
But you won't get to see the tears I cry  
Behind these hazel eyes

**Aneera. **Swallow me then spit me out  
For hating you, I blame myself  
Seeing you it kills me now  
No, I don't cry on the outside  
Anymore...

**Aneera and Leela. **Here I am, once again  
I'm torn into pieces  
Can't deny it, can't pretend  
Just thought you were the one  
Broken up, deep inside  
But you won't get to see the tears I cry  
Behind these hazel eyes

**Aneera and Leela. **Here I am, once again  
I'm torn into pieces  
Can't deny it, can't pretend  
Just thought you were the one  
Broken up, deep inside  
But you won't get to see the tears I cry  
Behind these hazel eyes  
Music ENDS.  
_Song was Behind These Hazel Eyes by Kelly Clarkson._

XXX

**Nicole. **I like that song!

**Danicka. **ME TOO!

**Voldemort. **It was...ehh...

**John Tartaglia. **Well folks now there yah have it! It's 1-800-ANEERA or 1-800-LEELA.

**Voldemort. **I'm gonna go for a second...

-Voldemort leaves.

**Danicka. **Gosh I thought he'd NEVER leave.

**Nicole. **Yeah. We're better off without him.

**Danicka. **Where do you think he's going?

**Nicole. **Bathroom.

**Danicka. **Why?? He's not human.

**Nicole. **So? Non-humans can pee. I mean like... YOU pee.

**Danicka. **What that supposed to mean??

**Nicole. **Maybe he has to go change pads or something. I don't know how the puberty system works for his kind. Seriously.

**Danicka. **What are these pads and why do you always ask mom for them??

**Nicole. **... You'll know when you're older. (IN HER MIND: I thought they teach this stuff at school.)

**John Tartaglia. **Okay TIME FOR A COMMERCIAL BREAK!

**Danicka. **Finally!

**Nicole. **Yeah I know. I'm gonna go say hi to my other buddies now BYE!

* * *

Setting: Back Stage

-Nicole walks to the snack table where the tacos are... Well used to be.

**Nicole. **Aww. The tacos are gone?

**Sam. **Don't blame me. It was her!

-She points to Aneera.

**Aneera. **Uhh... no it wasn't?

**Feather. **Guess what??? AMETHYST IS DOING SOMETHING EVIL!!

**Natalie. **YEAH!!!

**Nicole. **I know. She always is. I wouldn't be so surprised either if she was plotting something against Dib.

**Natalie. **You know she's working with Tak, too?

-Nicole spits out her soda that she so happened to be drinking at the moment.

**Sam. **Eww! You spit on me!

**Nicole. **HA!! Ha-ha!! Uhh I mean... Aww.

**Sam. **I got super powers anyway.

**Everybody else. **What?

-Sam snaps her fingers and her clothes go all clean again.

**Aneera. **I WANT SUPER POWERS!!

**Nicole. **I realized that all my buddies on this story are human except you :)

**Aneera. **Oh well.

**Nicole. **Why is she working with Tak???

**Feather. **I don't know, but what I do know is that they're doing something evil against DIB and Amethyst got the plan all written in a black notebook.

**Sam. **Show her the notebook!!

-Feather pulls it out of her purse. (A/N: YES I GAVE YOU A PURSE SO DEAL WITH IT!)

**Feather. **Here it is... HEY!

-At the moment, Amethyst used her super powers to run super fast and steal the suspicious looking notebook from Feather's hands.  
-Before anyone could see, Amethyst ran away super fast!

-WOW THAT'S SUPER!

**Nicole. **So? Where is it?

**Aneera. **Wait; shouldn't you know what's happening? I mean, you're writing the story.

**Nicole. **I know, but my NOT knowing what's happening adds to the drama I'm gonna put in later chapters.

**Natalie. **So you're not gonna do anything to stop Amethyst and Tak?

**Nicole. **YEP! The only thing I don't know is what happened to *ZIM and **ZIM.

(For reminder:  
Amethyst's DAD: *ZIM  
Aneera's HUSBAND: **ZIM)

**Aneera. **Is someone gonna get eliminated?

**Nicole. **YEP!!!! Three people are gonna be in the bottom three and one of them is being out, like American Idol.

-Everyone goes like "Ohh."

OMG!

**Amethyst. **YES! I got my evil notebook before Nicole could see it!

**Tak. **So what's your plan?

**Amethyst. **I drew it.

**Tak. **...Why? So you could post it on DeviantArt someday??

**Amethyst. **NO! I like to draw and I felt bored so I drew out my plan instead of writing it.

**Tak. **So...

**Amethyst. **So...what?

**Tak. **So what's your plan??

**Amethyst. **OH uhm now we have to get Jessie to get pissed at Dib for something.

**Tak. **But I want to see Dib dump her.

**Amethyst. **NO! You don't know her! They're just gonna talk it through and our plan will be over! That's why we have to get Jessie mad at Dib for something so she won't talk to him and then Dib would think that it's because she doesn't like him anymore.

**Tak. **Ohh... smart.

**Amethyst. **Yeah well I like to use both sides of my brain all the time :)

**Tak. **Don't we use our PAKs to think?

**Amethyst. **... Shut up, Tak, no one likes you.

**Tak. **At least I don't sing old songs!!

**Amethyst. **EXCUSE ME!! My song that I'm gonna sing with Kierra is gonna be AWESOME cuz you know why?? IT'S AWESOME! At least I don't wear anything embarrassing. I mean, did you see yourself today??

**Tak. **LOOK WHO'S TALKIN'!

**Amethyst. **Oh just... ugh! Follow my lead.

-They go to Jessie.  
-You see Jessie looking for Dib, but Dib is nowhere because he's like depressed or something.

**Tak. **(All happy and cheery) HI, Jessie!! What's up??

**Jessie. **Have you guys seen Dib? I'm lonely.

**Amethyst. **Dib? Are you talking about the bite-sized ice cream snacks? Or the other non-edible Dib?

-A/N: Get it? The bite-sized ice cream snacks, DIBS! HAH! Danicka was eating Dibs one day and she was like, "NICOLE! Guess what? I'M EATING A DIB!" and I was like "What are you talking about?" then I was like, "OOHH I GET IT!" HAHA!! ... Okay back to the story.

**Jessie. **What are you talkin' about?

**Tak. **We've been following' Dib for the past 2 weeks and--

**Jessie. **It's only been 3 days...

**Amethyst. **Weeks, days, big difference.

**Tak. **Yeah uhm he's been caught up with the whole uncovering Zim as an alien thing and well it seems like he's caught up in it too much so uhm well that's why he's not here right now.

**Amethyst. **YEAH! He, like, doesn't have time for "love."

**Jessie. **Are you serious? No, that can't be it; he promised that he'd give his time away for me because he said that there's no use of trying to expose him if they're not on Earth. Ohhh I hope he kisses me.

**Tak. **Oh.... EWW!! What's the matter with you??..

**Amethyst. **Yeah kissing him isn't all that great. I should know.

**Jessie. **WHAT? You...

**Amethyst. **IT'S NOT LIKE THAT!! It was an incident that I couldn't get out of!!

**Tak. **What kind of incident wouldn't let you get out of the incident of you kissing him??

**Amethyst. **Okay. Let me explain. It was a Romeo and Juliet thing... OKAY?!?!?!!! I happened to be Juliet and he happened to be ROMEO!!! It was a skool thing!! The talent show happened to be a contest and I won and unfortunately Dib won, too.

**Tak. **So... all these things SEEMED to HAPPEN?

**Amethyst. **It was the worst experience ever-

**Jessie. **Did it feel great?? I bet it did.

**Amethyst. **IT FELT HORRIBLE!! What do you see in that kid anyways??

**Jessie. **Smarts, cuteness, handsomeness...

-At this point, Amethyst and Tak stopped listening.

**Amethyst. **(TO TAK: Wow. Got any other ideas?)

**Tak. **(TO AMETHYST: Nothing!)

**Amethyst. **(TO TAK: Oh wait I got one. This might be crazy though but just go along with it.)

**Tak. **(TO AMETHYST: What are you talking about??)

**Amethyst. **What... what Tak really meant was that Dib was CHEATING ON YOU!

**Jessie. **What?? For whom??

**Amethyst. **TAK!

**Jessie. **TAK?

**Tak. **TAK??????!!!!!!!

-Jessie stares at her with a mean and angry face.

**Tak. **Uh... yeah?? NO IT'S NOT WHAT YOU THINK! He... came to me! YEAH! THAT'S IT! I was like, "Uh! No way! You got a girlfriend!" and he won't listen to me!! I was like what the f-(censored). But, I didn't do anything with him and for some reason... he left me alone.

**Amethyst. **Well not exactly. He's been stalking you. Secretly. Like, I was stalking HIM because part of my other plans to stop Dib from whatever he's doing is to do surveillance and he's been doing nothing but following Tak around.

**Jessie. **And this all happened today??

**Tak. **Today.... and yesterday.

**Jessie. **Yesterday? When we had our first date??

**Amethyst. **...yes.

**Jessie. **But we were supposed to have our second date at the theaters... I wanted to see Twilight!!

**Tak. **He keeps following me. Are you really sure he's gonna come tonight?

**Jessie. **OhmyGOD! I should've seen his coming!!

**Tak. **Guys will be guys.

-Jessie walks away.  
-Tak and Amethyst are alone.

**Amethyst. **Wow.

**Tak. **Yeah...WHAT WERE YOU THINKING?? Cheating on me?? ARE YOU SERIOUS??

**Amethyst. **I didn't wanna say my name and you came second in mind!!

**Tak. **Why didn't you say Nicole??

-Nicole comes out of nowhere.

**Nicole. **Because I'm the writer of the story and I hate Dib.

-She disappears.

**Tak. **Well you should've done one of the other girls like Sam or something. Sam looks like the kind of girl that likes Dib.

**Amethyst. **Too late for that now. I mean, look at that! We really destroyed Jessie.

**Tak. **Yeah.

-Silence.

**Amethyst. **YEAH!!

-They did a hi-five.

**Danicka. **I SAW THAT!

-They both turn around to see Danicka.

**Amethyst. **DANICKA!! Uhh... we were doing nothing!

**Tak. **Yeah you saw nothing!

**Danicka. **I SAW EVERYTHING!! What were you trying to do?? Break Jessie and Dib's relationship??

**Amethyst and Tak. **Yes.

**Amethyst. **Duhh. Doesn't it look obvious?

**Danicka. **You guys should like apologize to her or something.

**Tak. **Eww.

**Amethyst. **No way.

**Danicka. **Fine. Whatever.

-She leaves.  
-What Danicka is about to do next adds MORE DRAMA!!

-She writes a note to each of Dib and Jessie telling them to meet at the same place.  
-She hopes they get back together... or does she??? I KNOW she's suffering on the inside, seeing Dib with Jessie instead of her. HAHA!! Just kidding, Danicka!!

-Not like Danicka ever completely reads any of these chapters;; they're too long for her taste now.

* * *

Setting: The Place  
-Dib arrives.  
-Jessie arrives.

-Tak and Amethyst secretly stalked them and are hiding behind bushes.  
-That's so cartoon original.

**Jessie**. DIB!!

**Dib**. Hey I need to talk.

**Jessie**. What were you doing??

**Dib**. What are you talkin' about?

**Jessie**. What does Tak have that I don't??

**Dib**. What???

**Jessie**. Why are you doing this to me??

**Dib**. Doing what??

**Jessie**. Stop acting dumb!! But now I'm starting to see that you really ARE dumb, you JERK!

**Dib**. Oh yeah?? And what about you?? Why did you go out with me in the first place huh?? What were you doing?? Playing games with my heart??

**Jessie**. What???

**Dib**. I go on and then you come along and rip my heart to pieces!! What's this? A game to you??

**Jessie**. What are you saying?? Are you trying to change the subject? To talk about something that I have no clue about?? Trying to make me look like a retard??

**Dib**. What are you?? SERIOUSLY?? I thought you were different!!

**Jessie**. No!! You thought I wouldn't figure out!! BUT I DID!! It's OVER!!

**Dib**. It's BEEN OVER!!

**Jessie**. Well it's been over even way before it started!!!!!!!!

-Jessie walks away, her back towards Dib.

**Dib**. That makes no sense!! I can't believe I even liked you!! I'd rather date anyone else BUT YOU!!

-She pauses in her foot steps.  
-She turns around.

**Jessie. **I BET I WAS THE ONLY PERSON THAT'D EVER ACCEPT YOU FOR WHO YOU ARE!

**Dib. **That's a lie.

**Jessie. **Why don't YOU just leave me??

**Dib. **Fine, but I'm never coming back.

-Dib leaves Jessie to stand there alone.

-Dib stares at her for a minute, and then leaves. He realized what he just did.  
-He seriously broke her heart. But so? She broke his heart, too. Does it matter?

-Apparently, it does.

OMG!

-Tak and Amethyst saw everything from behind a bush.

**Amethyst. **Did you see that??

**Tak. **This is one of the best things I've ever done, next to successfully building a SIR unit of my own.

OMG!

**Dib. **Ohmygod! What have I done? My only girlfriend!! My only love!!...Which was a lie, but it doesn't matter. I don't need her. I really don't need her.

-FIVE MINUTES LATER!

**Dib. **I can't live without her!! I need her back!!

-He takes out his cell phone and tries to call her.  
-She doesn't answer. Obviously.

**Dib. **Crap. Well, it was too good to be true. No one would wanna date a paranormal investigator like me. (Sigh) Hey!! (A light bulb appears on his head) What if I turn to a cool person? That way, I get to be with her again! But she doesn't like me anymore...

-Then Dib wonders. What did Jessie mean by "What does Tak have that I don't?" Tak. Maybe she did something. SOMETHING EVIL! But Dib doesn't have time to jump to conclusions.

OMG!

**Amethyst. **Ohmygod Dib actually believes she hates him because he's such a geek.

**Tak. **I know. Isn't this great or what??

OMG!

**Dib. **I need help. Someone wise. Someone with years of experience.

* * *

Setting: Bathroom

**Dib. **GIR!! I need your help!!

-Dib looks through the stalls in each toilet.

**Dib. **Gir? Are you there?

-He feels that he should go to Gir for help because he feels Gir is smarter than everyone else. Isn't that insulting??  
-Dib stopped at a toilet that happened to be glowing.

**Dib. **...Gir?

-He peeked into the toilet.  
Out came Gir in his dog suit!!

(UGH! This dimension stuff is complicated.  
This is Gir from the one that came with Amethyst and Kierra.  
So we shall name this Gir as *GIR.)

***Gir. **Hi, big head!! Why you so sad?

**Dib. **I have this friend that wants to be cool and he needs advice.

***Gir. **Does he got friends right now?

**Dib. **No.

***Gir. **He do anything important to hoooman race?

**Dib. **Yes. He is currently trying to save the world.

***Gir. **Do people love him?

**Dib. **Uhm. No. Sometimes I--he feels he's a closeted homo sapien.

***Gir. **Really? Well... (He ponders) all I could say is that he a gay and if no one love him, he stay in closet. He good for nothing.

-Awkward silence.

**Dib. **Why?? But I'm not gay!

***Gir. **We not talking about you! And homo sapien gots the word HOMO in it!! Besides, if no one lurves him, then they's no use of being a cool person cuz NO ONE LIKES HIIM!!

**Dib. **Really?

-Awkward silence.

**Dib. **WELL THANK YOU FOR THE ADVICE!!

***Gir. **YOU WELCOME!!

-*Gir goes and flushes himself back in the toilet.

**Dib. **Sh--(censored). Looks like I'm on my own on this one.

* * *

Setting: On Stage

-All the judges were at their table.

**Nicole. **Oh! Hi Voldemort. Where have you been?

**Voldemort. **Nowhere.

**Danicka. **How many more people.

-Nicole looks at a paper.

**Nicole. **NINE more couples.

**Voldemort. **UGH!!!

**Danicka. **It's tiring to sit here all day to watch people sing.

**Nicole. **It's more tiring to type this all out. I SWEAR this is gonna be the longest story I'll ever type!! Like, NEVER EVER will I ever start a story as long as this again (until I'm completely bored). I mean like, it takes at least 2/3 weeks to type a chapter, even if I'm not busy at all. You know Jennifer? SHE even reminded me about two things to put in this chapter that happened to be very important and I completely forgot about it!! She's not the one writing the story either!!

**Voldemort. **Who's Jennifer?

**Danicka. **Look on the bright side. At least you got at least one review on this story.

**Nicole. **That... does make me feel a little better :)  
It helps remind me that people are actually reading this.

**Voldemort. **Seriously... who's JENNIFER??

**Danicka. **Why don't you just cut off the chapter from here?

**Voldemort. **WHO THE HELL IS JENNIFER??

**Nicole. **No... I wanna finish each round on each chapter. I so totally got an idea. Why don't we just get them to all sing their songs and then we judge them all at the end!! We should call this part of the round the "Lucky Seven" because there are like 7 people left.

**Danicka.** You're only doing this because you got lazy.

**Nicole.** Yeah.

**Danicka. **What if we forget what we were gonna say for judging?

**Nicole. **Just write it down on a piece of paper.

**Voldemort. **Forget it.

-A/N: Jennifer is my buddy!! I don't know if I'm allowed to say who she is because she might have like a secret identity or something lol.

**John Tartaglia. **OKAY PEOPLE!! The commercial break is over!! NEXT IS ZIM AND GIR!!

**Nicole. **Yeahh I can't believe that I almost forgot to make Zim sing.

**Zim. **Stupid human.

**Nicole. **I WASN'T TALKING TO YOU!

**Danicka. **I wonder what song you're gonna make them sing this time.

**Nicole. **Haha. You know I'm making a video called "Zim's a Soulja Boy?"

**Danicka. **Yeah. What happened to that?

**Nicole. **It's complicated. Really hard. SERIOUSLY. I'm only half way through the song. AMV's are stupid. GRR. So I'm taking a break from it.

**Danicka. **What does AMV stand for?

**Nicole. **I don't really know.

XXX

Music Starts Playing  
**Gir. **I hung up the phone tonight  
Something happened for the first time deep inside  
It was a rush, what a rush

**Gir. **'Cause the possibility  
That you would ever feel the same way about me  
It's just too much, just too much

**Gir. **Why do I keep running from the truth?  
All I ever think about is you  
You got me hypnotized, so mesmerized  
And I've just got to know

**Zim and Gir. **Do you ever think when you're all alone  
All that we can be, where this thing can go?  
Am I crazy or falling in love?  
Is it real or just another crush?

**Zim and Gir. **Do you catch a breath when I look at you?  
Are you holding back like the way I do?  
'Cause I'm trying and trying to walk away  
But I know this crush ain't goin' away-ay-ay-ay-ayy  
Goin' away-ay-ay-ay-ayy

**Gir. **Has it ever crossed your mind  
When we're hanging, spending time girl, are we just friends?  
Is there more, is there more?

**Gir. **See it's a chance we've gotta take  
'Cause I believe that we can make this into something that will last  
Last forever, forever

**Zim and Gir. **Do you ever think when you're all alone  
All that we can be, where this thing can go?  
Am I crazy or falling in love?  
Is it real or just another crush?

**Zim and Gir. **Do you catch a breath when I look at you?  
Are you holding back like the way I do?  
'Cause I'm trying and trying to walk away  
But I know this crush ain't goin' away-ay-ay-ay-ayy  
Goin' away-ay-ay-ay-ayy

**Zim. **Why do I keep running from the truth?  
All I ever think about is you  
You got me hypnotized, so mesmerized  
And I've just got to know

**Zim and Gir. **Do you ever think when you're all alone  
All that we can be, where this thing can go?  
Am I crazy or falling in love?  
Is it real or just another crush?

**Zim and Gir. **Do you catch a breath when I look at you?  
Are you holding back like the way I do?  
'Cause I'm trying and trying to walk away  
But I know this crush ain't goin' away-ay-ay-ay-ayy  
This crush ain't goin' away-ay-ay-ay-ayy  
Goin' away-ay-ay-ay-ayy  
Goin' away-ay-ay-ay-ayy  
Goin' away-ay-ay-ay-ayy_  
_Music ENDS.  
_Song was Crush by David Archuleta._

XXX

**Danicka. **That song?? Wow, I did NOT see that coming!!

**Nicole. **Did you know I was really originally gonna make them sing a song by Mindless Self Indulgence?

**Voldemort. **I heard about them; they scream a lot.

**Nicole. **They're like a heavy metal band or something.

**Zim. **HEY!! Are you going to JUDGE US or NOT??

**Nicole. **NO!! I said I make everybody sing first and then we judge at the end!! Doing this also adds suspense to the contestants :D

**Zim. **You suck you know that right?

**Nicole. **You suck, too. Are you still gonna make Dib suck your balls? (PREVIOUS CHAPTER JOKE)

**Zim. **OH YEAH I FORGOT ABOUT THAT!!

* * *

Setting: Backstage

-Dib was watching everything from backstage.

**Dib. **Oh no. That sick pervert.

**Gaz. **He's gonna rape you?

**Dib. **No, he's making me suck his POISONOUS GUMBALLS!! He just said it in a sick perverted way that a rapist would say it... How did you get backstage anyway?

**Gaz. **Staff entrance.

**Dib. **But how? Aren't there Irken high tech guards with high tech Irken Tazers?

**Gaz. **They let me in anyway.

* * *

-FLASHBACK STARTS!!!!!!!!!!!!

Setting: Staff Entrance

-Gaz was standing in front of two Irken high tech guards with Tazers, blocking the staff entrance door.

**Guard #1. **You can't go in here.

**Guard #2. **Yeah! STAFF ONLY!!

**Gaz. **Let me in. My brother's in there.

**Guard #2. **A lot of people's relatives are in there.

**Guard #1. **Yeah, but you can't go in.

**Gaz. **LET ME IN NOW!

**Guard #1. **NO! It's against the rules!

**Gaz. **Why?!

**Guard #2. **You might help your brother cheat and then win.

**Gaz. **Why would I want him to win??

**Guard #1. **You might also sabotage the other players' chances of winning.

**Guard #2. **And most of all...

**Both Guards. **YOU MIGHT STEAL ALL THE SNACKS AT THE SNACK TABLE!!

**Guard #1. **Snacks are for contestants only.

**Guard #2. **AND us. That means WE can eat them, too.

**Guard #1. **No we can't--

-Guard #2 hits Guard #1.

**Guard #1. **Erghh... yes we can. We can eat them, too.

**Gaz. **(IN HER MIND: I can't hurt them. They got Tazers. I hate Tazers.)

* * *

-FLASHBACK IN A FLASHBACK STARTS!!!

Setting: Gaz's House

-This was Dib and Gaz 4 years ago, so Dib is 6 and Gaz is 4.  
-A/N: I made Gaz two years younger than Dib because that's the best age I can think of.

-Dib was playing with a Tazer.

**Dib. **Hey, Gaz, CHECK OUT THIS TAZER!

-Dib accidentally shocked Gaz.

**Gaz. **AGGHH!! DIB!! TURN THE THING OFF!!!

-Dib turns it off.

**Gaz. **I HATE YOU, DIB!!!!!!!!!!!!!

-She beats Dib up, no matter how hurt she is right now.

-From that day on, Gaz started to hate Dib.

-And Tazers.

-THE END!!!

-FLASHBACK IN A FLASHBACK ENDS!!

* * *

Setting: Near Staff Entrance

**Gaz. **(IN HER MIND: How am I supposed to get through these people...I got an idea.)

**Gaz. **Did you guys know Dib was the banana king?

**Guard #1. **Foshizzle.

**Guard #2. **That means "yeah."

**Gaz. **Did you guys also know that I'm the Banana King's sister?

**Guard #2. **How can we trust you?? HUH!?!

**Guard #1. **Yeah, for all we know, you could be lying to us.

**Gaz. **(IN HER MIND: Okay forget this. I'm going in.) HEY!! GUARDS!! Look!! Someone's gonna hit you from behind!!

**Both Guards. **Huh??

-They both turn around.  
-As soon as their back was at Gaz, she knocked them both on the head unconscious.

-Then, one of the guards was about to wake up from his short unconsciousness.  
-Before he can do anything else, Gaz grabbed his Tazer and shocked him.

-It turns out that Tazers paralyzed him. She shocked the other guard too.  
-Gaz took two sacks and put it over both their heads. She tied it tight on their heads.

-Then, she carried them both over to a closet and before she could lock the door, one of the guards asked her something.

**Guard #1. **WHO... ARE YOU??

**Gaz. **I am Gaz. I don't wanna see you alive here ever again.

-Guard #1 moans.  
-She locks the closet door on them and walks away, expecting them to suffocate with the sacks over their heads in the very small closet room and die.

-She used their Tazers to FOREVER paralyze them, so they can't escape.  
Then, she went through the staff entrance to see Dib.

-FLASHBACK ENDS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

* * *

Setting: On Stage

**Nicole. **Now that we got Zim out of the way, who do you want for to go up next?

**Voldemort. **Let's see what Chris Brown and Brown Chris are gonna sing.

**Danicka. **What about Amethyst and Kierra?

**Nicole. **Nahh I just wanna give Jennifer a suspense heart attack and make her wait longer until her characters come up.

**Danicka. **That's mean!!

**Nicole. **That's drama. We gotta deal with it like we deal with life.

-Chris Brown and his robot go on stage.

**Chris Brown. **Hi. I'm gonna sing a song that I wrote.

XXX

Music Starts Playing

**Chris Brown. **1, 2, 3, 4..  
Hey (eh)  
Forever  
Hey (eh)  
Forever

**Brown Chris. **Its you, and me  
Moving at the speed of light into eternity (yeah)  
Tonight is the night  
To join me in the middle of ecstacy  
Feel the melody and the rhythm of the music around you, around you

**Brown Chris. **Ima take you there, Ima take you there  
So dont be scared, Im right here,you ready  
We can go anywhere  
Go anywhere  
**Chris Brown. **But first, its your chance  
Take my hand  
Come with me

**(Both)**  
It's like I waited my whole life  
For this one night  
Its gon be me you and the dance floor  
Cuz we only got one night  
Double your pleasure  
Double your fun  
And dance forever ever ever  
Forever ever ever  
Forever ever ever  
Forever (forever)  
Ever ever ever  
Forever ever ever  
Forever ever ever  
Forever on the dance floor

**Brown Chris. **Feels like were on another level (ohh ahh)  
Feels like our loves intertwined  
We can be two rebels  
Breaking the rules  
Me and you  
You and I  
All you gotta do is watch me  
Look what I can do with my feet, baby  
Feel the beat inside  
Im driving, you could take the front seat (front seat)  
Just need you to trust me (trust me)  
Girl girl girl  
Its like I

**(Both) **Its like I waited my whole life (oh)  
For this one night (one night)  
Its gon be me you and the dance floor (dance floor)  
Cuz we only got one night (ohh)  
Double you pleasure  
Double your fun (yeah)  
And dance forever ever ever (ohh)  
Forever ever ever (ever)  
Forever ever ever (ever)  
Forever (forever)  
Ever ever ever (ever)  
Forever ever ever (ever)  
Forever ever ever (ever)  
Forever on the dance floor

**Chris Brown. **It's a long way down  
We're so high off the ground  
Sending for an angel to bring me your heart  
Girl where did you come from?  
Got me so undone  
Gazing in your eyes got me saying  
What a beautiful lady  
No ifs ands or maybes  
Im releasin my heart  
And its feelin amazing  
Theres no one else that matters  
You love me  
And I wont let you fall girl  
Let you fall girl (ahh ohh oh oh yeah)  
Yeah, I wont let you fall  
Let you fall  
Let you fall (ohh ohh)  
Yeah yeah  
Yeah yeah

**(Both)  
**Its like  
Its like I waited my whole life (**Chris Brown. **whole life)  
For this one night (**Chris Brown. **one night)  
Its gon be me you and the dance floor (**Chris Brown. **me you and the dance floor)  
Cuz we only got one night  
Double your pleasure  
Double your fun  
And dance forever ever ever  
Forever ever ever  
Forever ever ever  
Forever  
Ever ever ever  
Forever ever ever  
Forever ever ever  
Forever on the dance floor

**Chris Brown.**  
ohh oh oh oh oh oh ohhh yeah  
Forever ever ever ever  
Forever ever ohh

Music ENDS.  
_Song was Forever by Chris Brown._

XXX

**Nicole. **I so totally loved that song!!

**Danicka. **No judging yet remember?

**Nicole. **Oh yeah.

**Danicka. **(to Nicole) I thought Chris Brown got arrested for hitting Rihanna.

**Nicole. **Oh he did but he bailed himself out. Okay enough talk NEXT!

**John Tartaglia. **Dexter and D 3000.

**Nicole. **Who's that again?

**Danicka. **From Dexter's Laboratory.

**Nicole. **Oh yeah.

-Audience waits.

**Voldemort. **Where is he?

-A person with a note comes up to the host and gives it to him.  
John Tartaglia reads the note.

**John Tartaglia. **It turns out that Dexter and D 3000 have went home. They cut themselves off the contest.

-Audience gasps.

**Nicole. **Wow and we didn't even criticize them.

**Voldemort. **What happened?

* * *

-ANOTHER FLASHBACK!!

Setting: Dark Room

**Stewie. **The thing is in here.

**Dexter. **Where are you bringing me?

**D 3000. **(beeps)

**Brian. **It's just a...

**Stewie. **A... uhh... TACO!

**Dexter. **TACO?!

-Stewie and Brian run away.

**Dexter. **Where am I? Why is it so dark? Where are you???

-Next thing you know, they see smoke.

**Dexter. **Is that smoke?

-Then Dexter sees something bright. It looked like... fire?!

**Dexter. **FIRE? HOW DID THAT GET HERE?! STEWIE AND BRIAN SET THE PLACE ON FIRE!!!! AHH!!

-Then Dexter and D 3000 got burned to ashes and so did the whole room.  
A fire truck comes and washes all the fire.

-FLASHBACK ENDS!

* * *

Setting: On Stage

**Danicka. **Nicole, did you kill off Dexter?

**Nicole. **No... (whistles)

**Danicka. **You can't whistle in real life so I KNOW YOU HAD SOMETHING TO DO WITH THIS!!

**Nicole. **So? It's not like YOU would care.

**Danicka. **Yeah I know.

**John Tartaglia. **Okay so that was an unexpected disappearance. Next is SKOODGE AND GEORGE CLOONEY!

-They go on stage.

**Voldemort. **Why is Skoodge's robot named "George Clooney."

**Nicole. **CUZ HE WANTED TO!

XXX

Music Starts Playing  
**Skoodge. **Rubbing' on that Italian leather  
Dem' Konvict jeans on!  
Ay yo Weezy! You Ready?  
Yeah!

**(Both)**  
I get it in 'till sunrise  
Doing 90 in a 65  
Windows rolled down screaming "Ahhh!!!"  
Hey-ey-ey... I'm so paid  
Number one hustla get money  
Why do you wanna count my money?  
I'ma hustla don't need them! One of them ya'll see!  
I'm so paid

**George Clooney.**  
I see police on the crooked I  
Doing a 100 on the Interstate 95  
My shawty leanin' blasting that Do or Die  
Pushin' that motherfuckin' wood cuz we certified  
Got a system that'll beat and knock your wall off  
Got a pump under my seat, the sawed-off  
Got a bunch of goons, hoping they never call off  
I'm a sniper sitting on the roof already saw y'all  
It ain't too much to put a strain on me  
That's the reason why I had to put the blame on me  
I rather have them dollar bills rain on me  
Then let them haters come and make the name of me  
That's why...

**(Both)**  
I get it in 'till sunrise  
Doing 90 in a 65  
Windows rolled down screaming "Ahhh!!!"  
Hey-ey-ey... I'm so paid  
Number one hustla get money  
Why do you wanna count my money?  
I'ma hustla don't need them! One of them ya'll see!  
I'm so paid

**George Clooney.**  
I am the boss it only takes one call  
For a driver to hit you up and drop you off that's all  
Guess what I won't be taking that fall  
Homie I got cake that's what I'm paying them for (aha!)  
Ain't that funny?  
Cuz niggas want war but ain't got money  
Cuz I've seen them all talking 'till they start gunnin'  
Quicker than Usain Bolt the fastest thing running  
Yeah! Akon! Weezy!  
Block oil holdin' down Jersey  
Devine making sure we gettin' it up front  
My little brother Boo got that vision bake it!

**(Both)**  
I get it in 'till sunrise  
Doing 90 in a 65  
Windows rolled down screaming "Ahhh!!!"  
Hey-ey-ey... I'm so paid  
Number one hustla get money  
Why do you wanna count my money?  
I'ma hustla don't need them! One of them ya'll see!  
I'm so paid

**Skoodge.**  
Oh-oh,  
Big money Weezy  
White wife beater with the sig underneath it  
How do I feel bitch I feel undefeated  
Snap my fingers disappear from the precinct  
Yea!  
I'm ballin' we ball out  
Thoughts of before until the ball bounce  
I see some niggas with guns at y'all house  
Only to find out you live in a doll house  
Damn!  
But I thought you was tough don't  
We carry choppers on our necks  
Call it cut throat  
We, bury powers on the set that they come from  
We, no magic turn  
We, smoke the gun smoke  
We, bomb first when we ride  
You, in a hearse when you ride  
Ay-yay  
I put my shoes on baby  
And I'm holding down Young Mula baby!  
That's why...

(**Both)**  
I get it in 'till sunrise  
Doing 90 in a 65  
Windows rolled down screaming "Ahhh!!!"  
Hey-ey-ey... I'm so paid  
Number one hustla get money  
Why do you wanna count my money?  
I'ma hustla don't need them! One of them ya'll see!  
I'm so paid

Music ENDS.  
_Song was I'm So Paid (Dirty Version) by Akon ft. Lil Wayne._

XXX

**Nicole. **OMG!

**DANICKA. **NO JUDGING YET!!

**Nicole. **Ugh.

**Danicka. **It was your idea.

**John Tartaglia. **NEXT IS AMETHYST AND KIERRA!!!!

**Danicka. **I completely forgot about them.

**Nicole. **I didn't [:

XXX

Music Starts Playing.  
**Kierra. **She walks to school with the lunch she packed  
Nobody knows what she's holdin' back  
Wearin' the same dress she wore yesterday  
She hides the bruises with linen and lace

**Kierra. **The teacher wonders but she doesn't ask  
It's hard to see the pain behind the mask  
Bearing the burden of a secret storm  
Sometimes she wishes she was never born

**(Both) **Through the wind and the rain  
She stands hard as a stone  
In a world that she can't rise above  
But her dreams give her wings  
And she flies to a place where she's loved  
Concrete angel

**Kierra. **Somebody cries in the middle of the night  
The neighbors hear, but they turn out the lights  
A fragile soul caught in the hands of fate  
When morning comes it'll be too late

**(Both) **Through the wind and the rain  
She stands hard as a stone  
In a world that she can't rise above  
But her dreams give her wings  
And she flies to a place where she's loved  
Concrete angel

**Amethyst. **A statue stands in a shaded place  
An angel girl with an upturned face  
A name is written on a polished rock  
A broken heart that the world forgot

**(Both) **Through the wind and the rain  
She stands hard as a stone  
In a world that she can't rise above  
But her dreams give her wings  
And she flies to a place where she's loved  
Concrete angel

Music ENDS.  
_Song was Concrete Angel by Martina McBride._

XXX

**Nicole. **This song almost made me cry.

**Danicka. **Almost?

**Nicole. **I don't cry when I watch/listen to something. Like when I saw Marley and Me, everyone cried except me I didn't feel a tear.

**Danicka. **You're lying.

**Nicole. **Just ask my friends. When you see me cry, you see red eyes and a red nose. But I didn't have that because I DIDN'T CRY.

**Voldemort. **Can we just get on with it?

**John Tartaglia. **Okay next is *Zim and Febreze.

XXX

Music Starts Playing  
**Febreze. **I dreamed I was missing  
You were so scared  
But no one would listen  
Cause no one else cared

**Febreze. **After my dreaming  
I woke with this fear  
What am I leaving  
When I'm done here

***Zim.**So if you're asking me  
I want you to know

**(Both) **When my time comes  
Forget the wrong that I've done  
Help me leave behind some  
Reasons to be missed

**(Both) **And don't resent me  
And when you're feeling empty  
Keep me in your memory

***Zim. **Leave out all the rest  
Leave out all the rest

**Febreze. **Don't be afraid  
I've taking my beating  
I've shared what I've been

**Febreze. **I'm strong on the surface  
Not all the way through  
I've never been perfect  
But neither have you

***Zim.**So if you're asking me  
I want you to know

**(Both)**  
When my time comes  
Forget the wrong that ive done  
Help me leave behind some  
Reasons to be missed

**(Both) **Don't resent me  
And when you're feeling empty  
Keep me in your memory

***Zim. **Leave out all the rest  
Leave out all the rest

***Zim. **Forgetting  
All the hurt inside  
You've learned to hide so well

***Zim. **Pretending  
Someone else can come and save me from myself  
I can't be who you are

**(Both)**  
When my time comes  
Forget the wrong that ive done  
Help me leave behind some  
Reasons to be missed  
Don't resent me  
And when you're feeling empty  
Keep me in your memory  
Leave out all the rest  
Leave out all the rest

**Febreze.**  
Forgetting  
All the hurt inside  
You've learned to hide so well  
Pretending  
Someone else can come and save me from myself  
I can't be who you are  
I can't be who you are

Music ENDS.  
_Song was Leave Out All the Rest by Linkin Park._

XXX

**Nicole. **Okay NO judging so I can save what I have to say for when we judge later on.

**Danicka. **Now that's the big sister that I know. I think.

**Voldemort. **What??

**Danicka. **I never know how she acts; she's so different everyday.

**Nicole. **Well I'm hard to figure out so deal with it.

**Danicka. **BUT THAT'S THE THING! We're sisters; I've been living with you for how long now? Nine years? And I still don't know you.

**Nicole. **Technically it's eight years cuz I moved in with you when you were one year old.

**Danicka. **Agh forget this.

-A/N: Our personal lives are complicated so I don't wanna explain everything.

**John Tartaglia. **Next is **Zim and Gir.

XXX

Music Starts Playing.  
**Gir. **Desperate for changing  
Starving for truth  
I'm closer to where I started  
I'm chasing after you

**(Both) **I'm falling even more in love with you  
Letting go of all I've held on to  
I'm standing here until you make me move  
I'm hanging by a moment here with you

**Gir. **Forgetting all I'm lacking  
Completely incomplete  
I'll take your invitation  
You take all of me now

**(Both) **I'm falling even more in love with you  
Letting go of all I've held on to  
I'm standing here until you make me move  
I'm hanging by a moment here with you

**(Both) **I'm living for the only thing I know  
I'm running and I question where to go  
And I don't know what I'm tapping into  
Just hanging by a moment here with you

****Zim. **There's nothing else to lose  
There's nothing else to find  
There's nothing in the world  
That can change my mind  
There is nothing else  
There is nothing else  
There is nothing else

****Zim. **Desperate for changing  
Starving for truth  
I'm closer to where I started  
I'm chasing after you

**(Both) **I'm falling even more in love with you  
Letting go of all I've held on to  
I'm standing here until you make me move  
I'm hanging by a moment here with you

**(Both) **I'm living for the only thing I know  
I'm running and I question where to go  
And I don't know what I'm tapping into  
Just hanging by a moment here with you

**(Both) **Just hanging by a moment  
Hanging by a moment  
Hanging by a moment  
Hanging by a moment here with you

Music ENDS.  
_Song was Hanging by a Moment by Lifehouse._

XXX

**Nicole. **I thought I didn't know this song but I did.

**Danicka. **Yeah? It sounded familiar to you, didn't it?

**Nicole. **YEAH!!

**Voldemort. **What?

**Nicole. **I'M CLOSE TO FINISHING!!! WHOO!!!!! I think.

**John Tartaglia. **Last, BUT NOT LEAST, Feather and VIR!

XXX

Music Starts Playing.  
**Vir. **Take me now, baby, here as I am  
Hold me close, and try and understand  
Desire is hunger is the fire I breathe  
Love is a banquet on which we feed

**Vir. **Come on now, try and understand  
The way I feel when I need your hand  
Take my hand, come under cover  
They can't hurt you now can't hurt you now, can't hurt you now

**BOTH. **Because the night belongs to lovers  
Because the night belongs to love  
Because the night belongs to lovers  
Because the night belongs to us

**BOTH. **Because the night belongs to lovers  
Because the night belongs to love  
Because the night belongs to lovers  
Because the night belongs to us

**Feather. **Have I a doubt, when I'm alone  
Love is a ring on the telephone  
Love is an angel, disguised as lust  
Here in our bed 'til the morning comes

**Feather. **Come on now, try and understand  
The way I feel, under your command  
Take my hand, and the sun resets  
They can't hurt you now can't hurt you now, can't hurt you now

**BOTH. **Because the night belongs to lovers  
Because the night belongs to love  
Because the night belongs to lovers  
Because the night belongs to us

**BOTH. **Because the night belongs to lovers  
Because the night belongs to love  
Because the night belongs to lovers  
Because the night belongs to us

Music ENDS.  
_Song was Because the Night by Cascada._

XXX

**JOHN TARTAGLIA. **So the LUCKY SEVEN have sung! Now you all line up on stage.

-The contestants of the Lucky Seven line up on stage.  
-A light shines on someone while everything gets dark.

-It was ZIM AND GIR!

**Voldemort. **Well it was your idea so what do we do?

**Nicole. **Okay so whatever the light shines on, we judge.

**Danicka. **Okay.

-Nicole looks down at her list.

**Nicole. **Okay, so Zim and Gir. You guys sang "Crush" by David Archuleta. I thought you guys were great. BUT WHY did you sing that?

**Zim. **It was GIR'S idea!!

**Gir. **I LOVE YOU MIMI!

* * *

Setting: Backstage

**Mimi. **Ugh.

**Tak. **I know.

* * *

Setting: On Stage

**Danicka. **Well I thought you guys sang okay. Fine.

**Zim. **WHAT'S THAT SUPPOSED TO MEAN??

**Voldemort. **That song annoys me and for in fact, made me stop listening to you.

**Gir. **ME LOVES ME SOME JUICE!!

-The light then shines on **Zim and Gir.  
-A/N: No, we're not judging in order, if that's what you readers were probably thinking.

**Nicole. ****Zim and Gir, you sang "Hanging by a Moment" by Lifehouse. Now may I ask WHY?

****ZIM. **Can I ask you something first?

**Nicole. **What?

****Zim. **Why are you asking these annoying questions??

**Nicole. **Because I'm curious. Your turn.

****Zim. **My turn to what?

**Nicole. **Answer my question.

****Zim. **Oh. Well because it was dedicated to Aneera, my wife.

-Audience goes like, "Aww."

**Nicole. **Well I hated your singing.

****ZIM. **WHAT?

**Nicole. **You were just horrible. I don't know what has become of you. I mean like you were GREAT at ROUND ONE and now you suck in ROUND TWO. WHAT'S GOTTEN INTO YOU?? This is NOT a good start.

**Danicka. **Uhh Nicole. That's because ROUND ONE was the elimination round.

**Nicole. **I meant auditions;; you know what I mean.

****ZIM. **SUCK?? I think I sang better than I ever did before.

**Danicka. **In my opinion, I think you guys sang the best.

**Voldemort. **Yeah, me too, and I'M the criticizing one?

****Zim. **Well was she just lying then?

**Danicka. **Ask other people later.

-Light shines on Amethyst and Kierra.

**Nicole. **Amethyst and Kierra. You sang "Concrete Angel" by Martina McBride. Why?

**Amethyst. ****ZIM was right; these are annoying questions.

**Kierra. **Because I thought the song was beautiful and that it would show off our voice more.

**Danicka. **The song's nice, but it's not my taste.

**Nicole. **Oh gosh! I just saw the music video while I was copying and pasting the lyrics to that song and it was so sad! The little girl was cute! But that mom was like so abusive and stuff;; she was gay.

**Danicka. **How can a mom be gay?

**Nicole. **A lot of things in nature are gay, Danicka;; you just gotta look closely. Oh by the way people, STOP CHILD ABUSE!!!!!

**Danicka. **STOP CHILD ABUSE!!!!!!! YEAH!

**Voldemort. **All right the song was... well I didn't care today, but your singing was brilliant. Congratulations, I think you guys might actually win this round.

-Amethyst and Kierra's faces light up with joy and happiness. Happy and joy. Happy Happy JOY JOY! HAHA! Just kidding.

-The light shows on Chris Brown and Brown Chris.

**Danicka. **I WANNA READ IT NOW!

**Nicole. **NO IT'S MY JOB!!

**Danicka. **MOM SHE'S NOT LETTING ME HAVE A TURN!

**Nicole. **Shut up! Mom's not here!!

**Danicka. **GIMME!!

-She starts pulling the clipboard that was containing the Lucky Seven list.

**Nicole. **NO NO DANICKA IT'S GONNA RIP!

**Danicka. **GIMME!!

**Voldemort. **UGH! Just let her have it!!

**Nicole. **NO!! Danicka, you can't just grab it. Now let go--

**Danicka. **But I wanna--

**Nicole. **LET GO!

-She lets go.

**Danicka. **You never let me have a turn.

**Nicole. **Now I don't wanna hear this "never" stuff. You KNOW you're not supposed to grab stuff;; you're mature enough for this kind of stuff. Now say sorry.

**Danicka. **Sorry.

**Nicole. **Say it like you mean it.

**Danicka. **Sorry.

**Nicole. **All right now ask for the list.

**Danicka. **Nicole, my good sister, will you please let me read the list?

-A/N: lol she really says "my good sister" when she gotta ask me for something.

**Nicole. **Yes, Danicka.

**Danicka. **All right CHRIS BROWN AND BROWN CHRIS you sang "FOREVER" by Chris Brown! Why??

**Chris Brown. **Because I wrote it.

**Nicole. **I LOVE that song. You sang well (of course).

**Danicka. **I thought you sang well, too.

**Voldemort. **The song is gay but your singing is good.

-THE LIGHT SHINES ON FEATHER AND VIR!

**Danicka. **FEATHER AND VIR YOU GUYS SANG "BECAUSE THE NIGHT" BY CASCADA! How does that make you feel?

**Feather. **HAPPY!

**Vir. **HAPPINESS!

**Danicka. **Your singing was "ehh" and the song was annoying.

**Nicole. **I liked your singing but I thought the song was annoying, too, but only on the "chorus" part.

**Voldemort. **I hated both. Your singing and the song.

**Feather. **ATTACK, VIR!!

-Vir turns into the ALMIGHTY BINDER and runs and smacks Voldemort a several number of times.  
-Then, she goes back to Vir's side.

**Nicole. **WE SHOULD MAKE PEACE! NOT VIOLENCE!

-The light shines on *Zim and Febreze.

**Danicka. **You, *Zim and Febreze, sang "Leave Out All the Rest" by Linkin Park. Why?

***Zim. **CUZ I WANTED TO!

**Danicka. **Well I thought your singing was great and the song was pretty nice and calm for a Linkin Park song, don't you think Nicole?

**Nicole. **Yes, I do, Danicka, Yes, I do. I like that song and I like Linkin Park. DUDE YOU KNOW WHAT I JUST FOUND OUT??

**Danicka. **What?

**Nicole. **That song was from the Twilight soundtrack! I searched the soundtrack on internet and this song was on Twilight! I didn't even know that and I heard this song way before I even knew it was on soundtrack!! PRETTY CREEPY HUH??

**Danicka. **Wow what other things do you know that I probably don't know?

**Nicole. **That there are really bugs and body parts in your cereal but you don't know it but every time you eat it, you eat bugs that are probably dead or bug eggs?

**Danicka. **Uhh no actually I knew that. I told you that remember?

**Nicole. **YEAH! I don't wanna eat cereal anymore!

**Danicka. **But you've been eating it all your life.

**Nicole. **Well now thinking of that fact that bugs are in it would make me throw up every time I even look at it.

**Voldemort. **You guys sang okay and I like that song.

**Danicka. **Really?

**Voldemort. **Mhm.

-THE LIGHT SHINES ON SKOODGE AND GEORGE CLOONEY!

**Danicka. **Skoodge and George Clooney, you guys sang "I'm So Paid" by Akon ft. Lil Wayne.

**Skoodge. **Yes.

**Danicka. **Nicole, I never even heard of that song before.

**Nicole. **That's cuz all YOU listen to is Radio Disney.

**Danicka. **No!

**Nicole. **Well I like that song;; my friends sing it all day at school. I thought you guys sang pretty good, too.

**Danicka. **Yeah your singing was good.

**Voldemort. **I like that song too but your singing was terrible.

**JOHN TARTAGLIA. **JUDGING IS FINALLY OVER!!! Tune in NEXT TIME to see results for this round, and FOR THE NEXT ROUND. See who makes it into the BOTTOM THREE.

**Person from backstage. **AND THAT'S A WRAP.

**JOHN TARTAGLIA. **Ugh finally. I thought this round would never end.

* * *

Setting: Dib's Room in the Hotel

**Dib. **Wow. Now that Dexter is gone, I guess this whole room is to myself.

-Gaz barges in.

**Dib. **GAZ?!

**Gaz. **Hey I'm moving in with you.

**Dib. **Why??

**Gaz. **CUZ I SAID SO and I need a better room. Mine sucks.

**Dib. **But Dexter's my roommate. He's just not here right now cuz--

**Gaz. **Cut the crap, Dib. I know what happened to him. So I'm taking his place.

**Dib. **In the contest??

**Gaz. **AS YOUR ROOMMATE.

-She takes out a long roll of gray duct tape and tapes half the room.

**Gaz. **This is my side and that's your side.

**Dib. **But what if I have to use the bathroom?

**Gaz. **Pee out the window. That window's on your side.

**Dib. **(In his mind: Ever since that fight with Jessie, I feel like she hates me because I'm not "cool." Who needs to be "cool" anyway? ...I do. I need to be a cool person. And I GOT AN IDEA! I will build the "COOL-INATOR" and then I go in it, and I press a button and I be a cool, good looking, normal sized head MAN!)

**Gaz. **Stop thinking. Your weird facial expressions while you think are making me sick.

**Dib. **GAZ I'm gonna build something here tonight but you're gonna have to deal with it since you're my roommate now.

**Gaz. **What's in it for me?

**Dib. **You keep that half of the room. But if you can't tolerate what I'm doing at night, then I'm gonna take that half and then kick you out.

**Gaz. **YOU WOULDN'T.

**Dib. **Actually I would. I'M the one in the contest. You should be happy I'm even letting you stay in here.

**Gaz. **But YOU do know there's a chance that you'll get beat up real bad when we get back home.

**Dib. **I'm taking that chance.

**Gaz. **Ugh. Fine. (IN HER MIND: My stupid brother and his stupid high self esteem got him to actually talk back to me now. That's gay.)

-That night, Dib started building the Coolinator.

****CHAPTER 7 ENDS!**  
**Will Dib's Cool-inator work? Will he make Jessie fall in love with him again?  
WHO WILL BE IN THE BOTTOM THREE? TUNE IN TO THE NEXT CHAPTER TO FIND OUT!

* * *

**ARE YOU READY FOR A WHOLE TRUCKLOAD OF DISCLAIMERS??**

**I don't own original Invader Zim characters. I don't own Dr. Doofenschmirtz, Doofenschmirtz Evil Incorporated, and the Doofenschmirtz Evil Incorporated song. I don't own Perry the Platypus. I don't own the song "Never Gonna Give you Up." I do not own Stewie and Brian. I don't own Hitler. I don't own Kierra, Amethyst, Hannah Montana, Natalie, and Bob and the band "Kiss." I also don't own invaderzimfannumber1. I don't own Decode and Sam and Peter Griffin. (I'm guessing that for the next chapter, Sam would want to sing Decode now.) I don't own "All the Single Ladies (Put a Ring on It) by Beyonce. I don't own Beyonce. I don't own Voldemort. I DO OWN Dancing with the Gays. I do not own John Tartaglia. I don't own Heartless by Kanye West. I don't own John Tartaglia. I also don't own Paper Planes by MIA. I DO OWN Dib's little robot, BOB. I also own UTAH and DAKOTA; I'm not talking about the states. I do not own fall for you by Secondhand Serenade. I do not own Twilight and Edward. I don't own Sam or Peter Griffin. I don't own Our Time Now by Plain White T's. I don't own iCarly. I do not own Selena Gomez. I DO OWN Jessie McCartney and her robot, JESSE. I don't own My Life Would Suck Without You by Kelly Clarkson. I don't own the name "Mountain Dew." I do not own the Jonas Brothers. I do not own any of the other owned characters in this story. I do not own the song Jingle Bell Rock by Bobby Helms. I don't own Jasper, Edward Cullen, and Twilight. I don't own Michael Jackson. I don't own Behind These Hazel Eyes by Kelly Clarkson. I don't own American Idol. I don't own DeviantArt. I don't own the bite-sized ice cream snacks, Dibs. I don't own Tak and the Power of Juju. FOOD IS GOOD. FOOD IS REALLY GOOD. I don't own Crush by David Archuleta. I don't own Mindless Self Indulgence. I don't own Behind these Hazel Eyes by Kelly Clarkson. I don't own Chris Brown and I don't own Rihanna. I don't own Dexter's Laboratory. I do not own the song I'm So Paid (Dirty Version) by Akon ft. Lil Wayne. I don't own Concrete Angel by Martina McBride. I don't own Marley and Me. I don't own the song Leave Out All The Rest by Linkin Park. I don't own Hanging by a Moment by Lifehouse. I don't own Because the Night by Cascada. I don't own Radio Disney.**

****FUN FACT: I was originally gonna have Dib and Jessie go on their second date and have Dib miss it because he forgot all about it and then get Jessie to get mad at him for that, BUT that wasn't as dramatic as the one I typed here and besides I got that first idea a long time ago and my ideas change over time so yeah. **

**There are 21,105 words in this whole chapter, including this sentence.**

**The list of the real people:  
Sam: SingSong2020  
Natalie: ribbonhamhamgir  
Feather: ExplodyThing  
Aneera: -Aneera-  
Jennifer: invaderzimfannumber1  
Nicole: CookieLuvahhXD (ME)  
Danicka: My Sister**


	8. Hiatus

**I'm on hiatus!**

What does this mean? It means I'm taking a break. You know how long my chapters are, right? Even halfway done with one chapter is like a whole story! I was halfway done with this chapter until my computer went gay and stopped working. I lost everything in it! My chapter, my story notes (yes, I have story notes to keep track of singing what song and stuff), everything! Now, I have to use the crappiest computer. Right now, I'm on my dad's computer, trying to type this for you people who are wondering why I haven't updated yet! I would have updated by now, though.

But the good news is that my idea for the chapter I was just writing sucks, now that I think of it. So I'm trying to make the story plot a little better. I started to lose the element of the story. Perhaps, this will give me a chance to think this through. Anyway, I'm sorry for the inconvenience! Seriously!

How long is a hiatus? As long or as short as I want. Feel free to review this, although this really isn't a chapter...

I know a lot of songs might have updated on the radio or on TV and stuff so if you want your character to sing a whole list of different songs, tell me.

~Cookie .


	9. Trapped in the DriveThru

**Irken Idol Chapter 9. Rated T. Okay people, I'm gonna do something different here. It's shorter than I usually do it and I'm still frustrated about the whole losing everything situation. While I try to get back on my feet from my horrible fall, I might as well do something different while trying to stand. And yes, that was a metaphor right there. It sucks? Oh well. Haha. I was never good at that stuff anyway. Oh and did anyone ever hear about that New Moon movie? I saw the trailer on MTV! I was like OMFG!**

I had to repost this as Chapter 9 because I guess people couldn't review on chapter 8 since they already did.

**Irken Idol  
Chapter 9: Trapped in the Drive-Thru**

Yeah, this isn't a script version, but I guess you people can bare the fact that it's actually full words and description. Script version is annoying to type.

* * *

Dib built his Coolinator. "Gaz! I made it! This is supposed to make me look like any person I want to be!"

"That piece of shit?" Gaz replied. "Try it. Does it work?"

She stared at it. It looks just like a phone booth, like that time when Jimmy Neutron built that time machine and went back in time to tell his dad to invest in McSpanky's, not that I watch it anymore.

"We'll see," Dib said.

He went in the Coolinator. He typed in the person whom he wanted to look like on the little keyboard thing he just installed in it.

Gaz waited while she watched Dib try to work the thing. In around five minutes, the machine started making whirring sounds and it started to light up on the little light bulb at the top. What was the point of the light bulb? The machine started getting louder.

"I can't believe it's gonna work," Gaz said to herself. But right after she said that, the machine started smoking, and she heard a crash in the machine's engine thing. "Oops, I spoke too soon."

Dib comes out with the smoke trailing behind him. He is coughing. His face was covered in black ashes and his hair is even more messed up than usual. His clothes look tattered and ripped and his glasses broke.

"Did you want to try to look fugly? Because you already do that on your own," Gaz said.

"I don't understand! I made sure I got everything right! I was sure it was going to work!" Dib cried.

"Like that time when you thought you could help save woman from God's monthly gift by wrapping cotton fabric around a stick and calling it a 'tampon?'"

"I swear that could've worked but it was already invented."

"You can't invent to save your life. Who did you try to look like, really?"

"Taylor Lautner."

"Who the hell is he?"

"I don't know, but Jessie's always talking about how 'hot' he is."

"Oh wow, Dib. You're pathetic. Haha! DIB! I heard your name meant 'small balls.'"

Dib's cell phone rings. He looks at the caller ID. "Ugh. It's my cousin Larry. This is like the second time he's calling."

"Since when did you get a cell phone?"

"Yesterday. I also got an automatic hover car yesterday. It works just like an ordinary car because you need the keys to put it in the ignition but it floats and then all you have to do is just think about where you wanna go! Then, the car will bring you to the place. Isn't Irken technology cool? Right now, it's in the garage in this hotel. I didn't even know they had a garage in hotels. But I guess in Irk they do it differently." I guess Dib forgot that they're on Planet Wollywood, not Irk.

Gaz stopped listening to him because she got bored.

"Well, I guess there's no use trying to build this now. I should work on a song. What should I sing for Irken Idol? Speaking of Irken Idol, where's Bob?"

Bob comes out from the kitchen. "I'm right here!" He's holding a bag of popcorn.

Dib noticed what Bob was holding. "Uhm, Bob, why are you holding a bag of popcorn?"

"Because I'm gonna eat it."

"But you're a robot! Why would you eat popcorn?"

"I'm gonna watch Finding Nemo!"

"Who told you to watch that crap?"

"Well, Gir—"

"Oh of course," Dib said. Of course Gir would tell Bob to do something like this.

"Actually, Finding Nemo isn't that bad. You should watch it," Gaz said.

"Wanna watch it with me, Gaz?" Bob asked.

"Eh, well it's better than watching Dib do stuff."

Gaz and Bob walk to the TV and watch the movie.

Dib was now alone in the room. What should he sing? Should he sing something for Jessie? Should he sing something stupid? Should he sing Michael Jackson songs? Thriller would be nice to sing, Dib thought.

"No! Nemo touched the butt!" Dib heard Bob scream in the other room.

* * *

Meanwhile, Zim was pacing the floor, thinking. *Zim, who was Amethyst's dad, was practicing a song he was going to sing for the next round.

"Would you stop singing? You can't sing at all! Your filthy voice isn't amazing! It was never amazing! I don't know how you actually made it into this contest!" Zim shouted at *Zim.

"I can sing better than you can ever sing! I can rap! I bet you can't!" *Zim replied

"Oh yeah? Then rap for me."

"Febreze! Give me a beat!"

While Febreze gave a beat, *Zim started rapping. Zim starts rolling his eyes, thinking this is a joke.

"Now, this is a story all about how  
My life got flipped-turned upside down  
And I liked to take a minute  
Just sit right there  
I'll tell you how I became the prince of a town called Bel Air," *Zim rapped.

"In west Philadelphia born and raised  
On the playground was where I spent most of my days  
Chillin' out maxin' relaxin' all cool  
And all shootin some b-ball outside of the school  
When a couple of guys  
Who were up to no good  
Startin making trouble in my neighborhood  
I got in one little fight and my mom got scared  
She said 'You're movin' with your auntie and uncle in Bel Air'

"I whistled for a cab and when it came near  
The license plate said fresh and it had dice in the mirror  
If anything I can say this cab is rare  
But I thought 'Now forget it' - 'Yo homes to Bel Air'

"I pulled up to the house about 7 or 8  
And I yelled to the cabbie 'Yo homes smell ya later'  
I looked at my kingdom  
I was finally there  
To sit on my throne as the Prince of Bel Air."

Gir comes out of nowhere and claps for *Zim. "Yay! Do that again!"

"Okay," *Zim said, "Now, this is a story all about—"

"Stop rapping! I get it!" Zim interrupted.

"I love that show! But I still like the scary monkey show better!" Gir said.

"So, can you rap?" *Zim challenged.

"I can… I just have to… save my voice… and… GIR! Let's run to the bathroom! I have to urinate my amazing pee!" Zim screamed.

"Yes, master!" Gir said, and they ran into the bathroom.

"But you can't pee! We don't have a urinary system—oh whatever. He can't rap and we both know that," *Zim said to himself.

XXX

Zim and Gir were in the bathroom together. Gir saw some soap and started eating some.

"He is too good! I can't rap in front of him!" Zim told Gir.

"You can't rape in front of him? That's not weird at all! Let's rape together!" Gir said in excitement.

Zim looked at him like he was really crazy now. "Uh, not rape, Gir, rap. By the time we get back to Earth, Dib is still going to be there to expose me for who I really am! We have to trap Dib here on Wollywood while we are still here."

"What does rape have to do with Dib? ARE WE GONNA RAPE HIM?"

"No… Gir… we are not… raping anybody…"

"Aw! Come on! You know you want to! Rape me first!"

"Would you just listen to me? We have to find some way to get him stuck here. On trial. I got an idea! We can… give him and Gaz a coupon to a burger restaurant! But it's a bad coupon, because it's expired! When they find out it's expired, they will bring Dib to trial, and he'll be stuck on Irk for 5 years, which are really 53 Earth years! By then, he'll be too old to even try to stop me from dominating the whole Earth!" Zim does his evil laugh.

"But if they find out that the coupon is expired, wouldn't it mean that they don't have a dollar off their burger and that they just would have to pay for full price? It's just a coupon. I don't really see how he goes to trial for 5 Irken years."

"Be quiet!" Zim interrupted. What the hell? I'm the master! He shouldn't tell me stuff. He should just obey me, he thought. "Only I know everything! I'm the amazing genius! Now obey me!"

"Yes, Master!" Gir's eyes turn red. "What do I do?"

"You go disguise as a Burger King delivery person and say that you're delivering this," Zim said and shows him the expired Burger King burger coupon. "The coupon is written in Irken so Dib won't know that it's expired! Now go!" He gives the coupon to Gir.

* * *

"I make the most of all the stress, I try to live without regrets." Dib was practicing his song. "But I'm about to break a… Grr… I forgot."

There was a knock on the door. "You'll get it!" Gaz screamed to Dib from the other room. "Just keep swimming!" Dib heard Bob say.

He went to the door and answered it. "Hello?" He saw a tall white kid. He's probably in his teens, Dib thought. He had acne all over and wore a hat that said "Burger King." His nametag said Bill.

"Uhm… May I help you?" Dib asked.

"Hi, I'm here to promote you to a dollar off our new special burger. The, uh, government hamburger," said Bill. "It's an ordinary burger with cheese and onions in it! Here's the coupon I'm supposed to give you." He shows the coupon to Dib.

"Government hamburger? That sounds delicious! What's in it?"

What Dib doesn't know is that Bill is really a robot and inside Gir controls him.

"Extra onions! There are onions in it! And cheese!"

"I love onions!"

"Get the government burger now in the drive-thru at Burger King because your coupon will expire in…" Bill looked at his fake watch, "an hour!"

"Wait! Where is Burger King?" Dib asked, but before Bill could answer, he was gone! "Oh well." He closes the door behind him and goes back in the room.

He goes to a different TV and turns it on to a cartoon.

"Invader Zim? It looks like some kind of stupid cartoon," he said to himself, "It's better than nothing. They don't show Mysterious Mysteries of Strange Mystery here anyway. At least I got a government hamburger with cheese and extra onions coupon. Oh wait. Where is it?"

He looks around for the missing coupon. "Oh no, he never gave it to me!"

* * *

Meanwhile, Zim asked Gir if the plan worked.

"Yes!"

"Really?" asked Zim. "So you gave him the coupon?"

"Yes!"

"Then what's that in your hand?"

Gir looks at his hand. "A coupon."

Zim raises his eyebrow, although he doesn't have any.

Gir kept staring at the coupon. "Oh."

* * *

"Oh well, I guess there's nothing to do but just watch 'Invader Zim,' whatever that is," Dib said.

XXX

Music Starts Playing: Trapped in the Drive Thru by Weird Al Yankovic  
(in** Dib's **point of view)

Seven O'Clock in the evening  
Watchin somethin' stupid on TV  
I'm zoned out on the sofa  
When my sister comes in the room and sees me

She says "Is this 'Behind the Music'  
With Lynard Skynard?"  
And I say, "I don't know.  
Say, it's gettin' late...what you want to do for dinner?

She says, "I kinda had a big lunch.  
So I'm not super hungry."  
I said "Well you know, Gaz, I'm not starvin' either  
But I could eat."

She said "So what do you have in mind?"  
I said, "I don't know what about you?"  
She said "I don't care, if you're hungry, let's eat."  
I said "That's what we're gonna do!"

"But first you gotta tell me  
What it is you're hungry for!"  
And she says, "Let me think...  
...What's left in our refrigerator?"

I said, "Well, there's tuna, I know."  
She said, "That went bad a week ago!"  
I said, "Is the chili OK?"  
She said, "You finished that yesterday!"

I hopped up and I said  
"I don't know, do you want to get something delivered?"  
She's like "Why would I want to eat liver?  
I don't even like liver!"

I'm like "No, I said 'delivered'."  
She's like "I heard you say liver!"  
I'm like "I should know what I said..."  
She's like "Whatever, I just don't want any liver!"

Well I was gonna say something  
But my cell phone started to ring  
Now who could be callin' me?  
Well I checked my caller ID

It was just cousin Larry  
Callin' for the third time today...  
My sister said "Let it go to voicemail."  
I said, "OK."

"Where were we? Oh, Dinner, Right  
So what d'ya want to do?"  
She said "Why don't you whip up somethin in the kitchen?"  
"Yeah," I said, "Why don't you?"

And then she said "Dib, can't we just go out to dinner, please?"  
I say "No"  
She says, "Yes"  
I say "No"

She says, "Yes"  
I say "No"  
She says, "Yes...  
...Oh, here's your keys"

I step a little bit closer  
Say "OK, where ya want to go?"  
She says "How about The Ivy?"  
I said "Yeah, well I don't know..."

I don't feel like gettin all dressed up  
And eatin' expensive food  
She's says "Olive Garden?"  
I say "Nah, I'm not in the mood...

...And Burrito King would make me gassy  
There's no doubt"  
She says "Just forget about it"  
I said "No, I swear I'm gonna take you out!"

Then I get an idea  
I say "I know what we'll do!"  
She says "What?"  
I say "Guess"

She says "What?"  
I say "We're goin' to the drive-thru!"  
So we head out the front door  
Open the garage door

Then I open the car doors  
And we get in those car doors  
Put my key in the ignition  
And then I turn it sideways

Then we fasten our seat belts  
As we pull out the driveway  
Then we drive to the drive-thru  
Heading off to the drive-thru

We're approaching the drive-thru  
Getting close to the drive-thru!  
Almost there at the drive-thru  
Now we're here at the drive thru  
Here in line at the drive-thru

Did I mention the drive-thru?

Well here we are  
In the drive-thru line, me and her.  
Cars in front of us, cars in back of us.  
All just waiting to order

There's some idiot in a Volvo  
With his brights on behind me  
I lean out the window and scream  
"Hey, Whatcha tryin to do, blind me?"

My sister says "Maybe we should park...  
...We could just go eat inside."  
I said, "I'm wearin' bunny slippers  
So I ain't leavin' this ride..."

Now a woman on a speaker box  
Is sayin' "Can I take your order, please?"  
I said, "Yes indeed, you certainly can  
We'd like two hamburgers with onions and cheese."

Then my sister says  
"Dib, hold on, I've changed my mind!  
I think I'm gonna have a chicken sandwich  
Instead, this time"

I said "You always get a cheeseburger!"  
She says "That's not what I'm hungry for."  
I put my head in my hands and screamed,  
"I don't know who you are anymore!"

The voice on the speaker says  
"I don't have all day!"  
I said "Then, take our order,  
And we'll be on our way!

I wanna get a chicken sandwich  
And I want a cheeseburger, too  
She's like "You want onions on that?"  
I'm like "Yeah, I already said that I do...

...Plus we need curly fries  
And don't you dare forget it!  
And two medium root beers  
No, just one, we'll split it."

Then I said "I'm guessin' that  
You're probably not too bright...  
So read me back my order  
Let's make sure you got it right."

She says "One, you want a chicken sandwich.  
Two, you want a cheeseburger  
Three, curly fries, and a large root beer"  
"Stop, don't go no further!"

"I never ordered a large rootbeer  
I said medium, not large!"  
Then she says "We're havin' a special,  
I supersized you at no charge."

"Oh." And that's all  
I could say, was "Oh."  
And she says "Now there is somethin' else  
That I really think you should know.

You can have unlimited refills  
For just a quarter more..."  
I say "Great, except we're in the drive thru...  
So what would I want that for?"

Then she says "Wait a minute  
Your voice sounds so familiar...hey, is this Paul?  
And my sister is all like "No, that ain't Paul,  
Now tell me, who's this Paul?

She says "Oh, he's just some guy  
Who goes to school with me.  
I sat behind him last year  
And I copied off him in Geometry.

I said, "I know a guy named Paul.  
He used to be my plumber  
He was prematurely bald  
And he moved to Pittsburgh last summer.

He also had bladder problems  
And a really bad infection on his toe."  
And she said "Mister, please, you can stop right there,  
That's way more than I needed to know!"

And then we both were quiet  
And things got real intense  
Then she says "Next window please,  
That'll be five dollars and eighty two cents."

So we inched ahead in line  
Movin' painfully slow  
I got a little bored  
So I turned on the radio...

[Song plays]

[Click] Turned it off  
Because my sister was getting a headache  
So we both just sat there quietly  
For her sake.

Then I looked at her  
And she looked back at me  
And I said "Um,  
I think you have somethin' in your teeth."

She turned away from me  
And then turned back and said "Did I get it?"  
I said "Yeah. Well, I mean, most of it...  
But hey, ya know, don't sweat it."

Then she said "How about now?"  
I said "Yeah, almost.  
There's still a little bit there  
But don't worry, it's probably just a piece of toast."

Now we're at the pay window  
Or whatever you call it  
Put my hand in my pocket  
I can't believe there's no wallet!

And the lady at the window's like,  
"Well, well, well, that'll be five eighty two."  
I turn around to my sister, and say  
"How much have you got on you?"

She just rolls her eyes and says  
"I'll pay for this, I guess."  
So she reaches into her pocket  
And busts out the American Express

I hand it to the lady  
And she says "Oh, dear.  
It's gotta be cash only  
We don't take credit cards here."

I took back the card and said  
"Gee, really? Well that sucks."  
And that's when I found out  
My sister was only carryin' three bucks.

I said, "I thought you were  
Going to hit the ATM today"  
She says, "I never got around to it  
So where's your wallet anyway?

And I said "Nevermind,  
Just help me to find some change..."  
Now the lady at the window  
Is lookin at me kinda strange...

And she says "Mister, please,  
We gotta move this line along"  
I said, "Now hold your stinkin' horses lady,  
We won't be long."

We looked around inside the glove box  
And check the mat beneath my feet  
I found a nickel in the ashtray  
And a couple pennies and a dime in the space between the seats

Before long I had a little pile  
Of coins of every sort  
The lady counts it up and says  
"You're still about a dollar short"

And now my sister's got this weird look  
Frozen on her face  
She screams, "you know  
I wasn't even really hungry in the first place"

And so I turned around  
To the cashier again  
I shrugged and said "OK  
Forget the chicken sandwich then"

So I pick up my change  
Pick up my receipt  
And I drive to the pickup window  
Man, I just can't wait to eat

And now we see this acne ridden  
Kid about sixteen  
Wearin' a dorky nametag that says  
"Hello, my name is Eugene."

And he hands me a paper bag  
I look him in the eyes  
And I say to him "Hey, Eugene,  
Can I get some ketchup for my fries?"

Well he looks at me  
And I look at him  
And he looks at me  
And I look at him

And he looks at me  
And I look at him  
And he says "I'm sorry  
What did you want again?"

I say "Ketchup!"  
And he says "Oh yeah, that's right...  
...I just spaced out there for a second  
I'm really kind of burnt tonight."

And then he hands me the ketchup  
And now we're finally drivin' away  
And the food is drivin' me mad  
With its intoxicating bouquet

I'm starvin' to death  
By the time we pull up at the traffic light  
I say, "Gaz, gimme that burger,  
I just gotta have a bite!"

So she reaches in the bag  
And pulls out the burger  
And she hands me the burger  
And I pick up the burger

And then I unwrap the paper  
I bite into those buns  
And I just can't believe it  
They forgot the onions!

Music Ends.

**Credit to Danicka, for showing me this song. I don't own New Moon, MTV, and the song "Trapped in the Drive-Thru" by "Weird-Al" Yankovic, and Jimmy Neutron, and McSpanky's, and Google, and Finding Nemo, and the name Febreze, and the lyrics to the Fresh Prince of Bel-Air, and the show Fresh Prince of Bel-Air, and Burger King.**

**I don't own original Invader Zim characters and I own my own characters.**

**Click the button below and type something good about this story. [;**


	10. The Jewish

**Hello, my sexy lovers! Read this! It's Irken Idol. Chapter 10. Rated T. For some racism, although no racism is intended whatsoever.**

**Irken Idol**  
**Chapter 10: The Jewish

* * *

**

"Who's Michael Jackson?" I asked. I heard of this guy before. I heard of him once back in that filthy human skool in Earth, but not exactly.

"He was an awesome dude," Nicole said. I always thought she was weird.

Why am I with Nicole and Danicka anyway?

"Yeah," Danicka said. "So did you hear? Michael Jackson died!"

"I know!" Nicole replies, "I also heard he was Indian! But I thought he was black!"

"But the news said he was born in India."

"He was born in Indiana! Not India!"

"Oh…"

And from then on, that was one of the weirdest conversations of my life. Of course, I had weirder with the Dib, but Nicole and Danicka just know how to start my day off with learning about a death of a person. Whenever I think of Dib, I just feel different. I heard of "love" but Irkens don't feel love. But if I wasn't Irken, how would I feel for this Dib?

"DIB!" I scream to him. I was walking around the Kajolica Hotel, thinking about Michael Jackson.

"What do you want, Zim? I'm trying to memorize a song!"

"What did Michael Jackson do with his life?"

"Why do you wanna know about him?"

"Just tell me! Or I will kill you!"

"You can't kill me, Zim, because no matter what you do, I'll always beat you! You were always a horrible invader. Even Tak would've ruled the world by now. Besides, even if I didn't exist, you still wouldn't get close to ruling Earth."

"LIES! I will dominate Earth! You're just a little nuisance to me, like a little bird dookie stuck to the windshield of my Voot Cruiser. Like I said before, I will make you suck my poisonous gumballs until you die! Now tell me who this Michael Jackson was! What was his purpose in life?!" I had no idea why I wanted to know about the purpose of a human's life.

"Suck your balls? That still sounds so wrong, but hilarious, yet I'm not laughing, because I feel like you're gonna rape me after all this."

"So we are gonna rape Dib?!" It was Gir. Where did he come from?! Oh yeah, I told him to follow me the other day in case I needed him. "I knew it! I knew it!"

Dib gives a weird look at Gir, and then at me. Right before he begins to run away, I stop him. "Gir! Hold Dib!"

"Okay!" He runs really fast to Dib and pins him down on the ground, right on top of him.

"Please! I don't wanna lose my virginity!"

"What's that?" I asked. "Oh that's not important right now. I just wanna know what Michael Jackson did with his life."

"He sang songs, like Thriller!"

"I love that song!" Gir exclaimed.

Next thing I knew, Dib ran away from Gir's grasp. The way Dib runs makes me feel… happy… in a way, but I'm not exactly. But for some reason I just wanna be right next to him all the time…

"YOU LOVE DIB!" Gir screamed at my face.

"No I don't, Gir! Stop saying that! I hate that Dib weasel!"

"Denial. Always the first step."

Oh my god, no matter what I've always hated his guts. His jiggly brain. Jiggly…I like jiggly. But I hate Dib. What does Gir call it? ZaDr? Sometimes I wonder what's in that head of his.

"ZIM!!"

"Flamingos!" I screamed.

"Why did you say that?" Nicole said.

"Because you screamed in my face, butt cuddler!" I don't even know what a butt cuddler is, but I know it's an insult.

"Okay well I'm going around letting everyone know that the third round is next!" the butt cuddler said.

"I know that! What do you think I am? Stupid?"

"Yes, I think you're very stupid."

"Your mom."

"Your mom's face."

"Your face's mom."

"You mom's mom's face's mom. Look we can do this all day, but I can't. I have to tell everyone else about the third round." Nicole finally leaves.

But then she comes back. "I forgot to tell you that in the third round, you people have to work with someone else. So, imagine if you and Dib are paired up!" When she mentioned his name, I felt a little happy. "That would mean that you and Dib both have to sing a song! Together! Doing this would do three things. 1: This would make things more interesting, 2: It would be easier for me to do this story, and 3: It makes me wish for a third thing. Okay, bye!" She left.

But then she comes back. Her presence is becoming a nuisance to me. "Oh I forgot, AGAIN, that your SIR unit has to pick who he wants his partner to be. Not you. Bye!" She pats me on the back and then leaves.

"I pick Mimi!" Gir says quickly.

"No, I will pick!" Zim said.

"Master, Nicole says I pick!"

"You will obey me, Gir!"

"Yes Master…"

"I pick--" and from the back of my head, the name comes out from my lips "--Dib." As soon as I said that, an electrical shock jolts through my amazing and sexy Irken veins. "Hey! What just happened?!"

Involuntarily, a holographic screen appears from my awesome PAK. On it shows Nicole's face. Her face makes me angry! VERY ANGRY!

"I just said GIR has to pick! Not you! Everytime you won't listen to me, I'll shock you! HAHAHAAA!! In case you didn't know, I put an electric shocker thing on your PAK. Now FEAR ME!"

The screen disappears.

"Fluffiness!" Gir says excitedly. He's holding some kind of green thing. Whenever he presses the button, it spins.

"AAAH!! What is that?!" I reacted.

"The Go Go Duster! It spins!" He presses the button on it again and it starts spinning.

"That says Go Duster," Dib said. Where did he come from? Bob, his robot, is right next to him. "I have that back at home. It spins and you use it to clean up horrible dust bunnies."

"What do you want from my AMAZING and sexy life, DIB?!"

"Bob wanted to tell Gir something…" Dib said.

"BOB! I LOVE YOU!" Gir came and hugged Bob.

"ME TOO! For the third round, I wanna be your partner!"

"But… I love Mimi, too."

"Mimi hates you."

"Mimi is sooooo sexxyyy…" Gir starts having that gleam in his eyes.

"No! I will not be your partner!" Mimi said. Where did she come from?!

"Aww! Why not?? I wanna rape you!"

"More the reason why I don't wanna be your partner," Mimi said. She disappears.

"So I guess you're my partner now," Bob said.

"YAY, BOB'S MY PARTNER!" Gir said.

"Yay!" Bob said!

"Oh great. Now I'm paired up with Zim," Dib said in frustration.

"Shut your noise tube, you little slimy earthworm. No one likes you," I said back.

"Guys! We have to work together!" Bob told us.

"TEAMWORK!!" Gir said.

"Okay fine, but I'm picking the song!" I said.

"You?! Why should you pick the song??" Dib asked.

"Because I'm amazing! AND SEXY!"

"You're gonna pick a horrible song, like you always do!"

"Who sings Jonas Brothers songs anyway?!"

"I know what we'll sing!" Bob said.

"What is it??" Gir said.

"Thriller."

We had practice for the next two days. It was horrible. Listening to that Bob's instructions. I AM ZIM! No one tells ME what to do! But I had no other choice anyway. Whenever I tried to take over, Nicole's wretched electric shocking thing kept shocking my PAK with its horrible volts. Of doom. Curse Nicole. If I had my plunger of doom right now, I would kill everybody here. EVERYONE! Except Dib… So… That I can kill him in a more interesting way…

The next day...

"Welcome to the third round of Irken Idol! John Tartaglia is no longer here…" said the new host. It was Irken Idol now.

"Boo!!" Nicole screamed.

"Shut up!" Danicka said.

"Johnny rocks. I can't believe he's gone!"

"Anyway, I am your new host! My name is Oswald, and today is a different round than usual… Everyone is paired up to do a song! Together!" Oswald said. "You need at least 8 points to pass this round to make it into the next round!"

"We have points now?" Danicka asked.

Everyone cheers. Hooray…

"But first, we have to do the bottom three!"

Dramatic music plays.

"The people in the bottom three are Aneera and Leela, *Zim and Febreze, and Natalie and Bob," Oswald says.

"Wow, that was pretty straightforward," Nicole said.

"At least he doesn't waste time and tries to make it 'dramatic,'" Danicka said.

"Wait! We can't be out! We're awesome! I'm part dragon!" Aneera said.

"I sang better than all of the people here!" *Zim said. "THIS CONTEST IS RIGGED!"

"Too late now," Oswald said. He pressed a button on an automatic remote that he just conveniently took out of his pocket. Trapdoors opened underneath the bottom three as they fell to their doom. "Now let's start the contest!"

Everyone cheers.

"Where do the trapdoors lead to, anyway?" Danicka asked.

"A room..." Oswald says, suspiciously.

"Don't look at me. Not even I know," says Nicole.

Meanwhile... in the backstage...

"Are you nervous?" Dib asked me.

"NO!" I said. Actually I was. Bob taught us the most stupid dance moves. And I look ridiculous. I look like a candy zombie from Halloween back on filthy Earth. Coming to eat out everybody's guts! And destroy the whole human race by eating them! Wait… that's not such a bad idea…

"I am! I can't stand working with you!" Dib said. "You could bring my points with the judges down!"

"As if your points weren't low enough," I pointed out.

"Come on guys! We have to work together!" Bob said. He looked more stupid than I did. He's in a red suit. I think he's wearing rubber pants.

"I'm a pretty lady!" Gir said. He looked like a human female pig. He had a blonde wig on and a skirt.

"Well if we were first, I would die!" Dib said, trying to express his nervousness.

"Be my guest!" I said. "Why do we have to look like candy zombies anyway?"

"It's in the music video," Bob said.

"But Master, you amazing! I wanna eat you! But I won't…" Gir said.

"Yes, I am amazing!!" I said. It's about time someone realized my superiority. "Here! Put this on." I give Dib the small little cloning chip so he could pin it on his shirt.

"What's this?" Dib said as he stared. "I thought we already had this talk! If you kill me now, we BOTH will lose!"

"This isn't a killing device, you insolent fool!" I said. But fooling humans to pin killing devices on their clothes isn't a bad plan. "Remember how I said we were gonna use holographic clones? You put this on so the Replicating Microchip™ can detect your moves and duplicate your image holographically."

"WOW! I had no idea what you said, but it sounded cool," Dib said. He put it on.

"First are Gir and Zim, and Bob and Dib!" They heard Oswald say.

"Oh man! We are first!" said Dib.

Now, to the stage... All the lights turn off. People scream in excitement... Dim lights turn on to face the stage.

Gir, in his Earth female suit, is walking with Bob, who is in his red rubber pants suit. They were walking and they started talking.

"It's only a movie," Bob reassured Gir.

"It's not funny," Gir said. He sounded convincingly scared.

"You're scared, aren't you?"

"I'm not that scared..." He tried to hide it in his voice, but you could still hear the nervousness in it.

"You're scared," Bob smiled.

XXX

Music Starts Playing: Thriller by Michael Jackson

-lyrics based on music video

**Bob. **Its close to midnight and something evils lurking in the dark  
Under the moonlight you see a sight that almost stops your heart  
You try to scream but terror takes the sound before you make it  
You start to freeze as horror looks you right between the eyes,  
You're paralyzed

**Bob. **You hear the door slam and realize theres nowhere left to run  
You feel the cold hand and wonder if youll ever see the sun  
You close your eyes and hope that this is just imagination  
But all the while you hear the creature creepin up behind  
You're out of time

**Bob. **They're out to get you, there's demons closing in on every side  
They will possess you unless you change the number on your dial  
Now is the time for you and I to cuddle close together  
All thru the night I'll save you from the terror on the screen,  
I'll make you see

_Bob and Gir skipped in a happy way as they kept walking like the happiest couple in the world. Talk about gay relationships. Unless... Gir's not a boy..._

-Fog starts to crawl on the stage.

**Zim. **across the land  
The midnite hour is close at hand  
Creatures crawl in search of blood  
To terrorize yawls neighbourhood  
And whosoever shall be found  
Without the soul for getting down  
Must stand and face the hounds of hell  
And rot inside a corpses shell

-At this point, Dib and I started walking on to the stage in a zombie way. Replicating Microchip™ did its work as it made holographic clones of us. So right now, there are around 20 holographic zombies on stage.

**Zim. **The foulest stench is in the air  
The funk of forty thousand years  
And grizzy ghouls from every tomb  
Are closing in to seal your doom  
And though you fight to stay alive  
Your body starts to shiver  
For no mere mortal can resist  
The evil of the thriller

-We, as zombies, start closing in on Bob and Gir, making them looked scared. Gir looks away for a second, and then he looked back at Bob to see him look like a zombie too.

-And then for some random reason, we started dancing...and what seems like forever, Bob finally starts singing.

**Bob. **cause this is thriller, thriller night  
And no ones gonna save you from the beast about strike  
You know its thriller, thriller night  
Youre fighting for your life inside a killer, thriller

**Bob. **thriller, thriller night  
cause I can thrill you more than any ghost would ever dare to try  
(**Zim and Dib.**) thriller, thriller night  
So let me hold you tight and share a killer, diller, chiller  
Thriller here tonight

**Bob. **'Cause this is thriller, thriller night  
Girl, I can thrill you more than any ghost would ever dare try  
(**Zim and Dib.**) Thriller, (**Bob.**: WAHOO!) thriller night  
So let me hold you tight and share a killer, thriller, ow!

Music ends.

XXX

So the music ended right when Bob screamed "OW!" Everyone cheers. Of course they should cheer... I was in it. I took a button out of my pocket (I don't think I even have a pocket) and I pressed the off button, turning off the Replicating Microchip™, revealing that it was only Dib and me on stage.

"Wow! Now that was a great performance that Gir and Bob and Zim and Dib did!" Oswald said.

"Thank you, I--" Dib was about to say but he got interrupted.

"Now let's hear what the judges have to say."

Nicole is first. She always judges first. I think. OF COURSE she's gonna think we were awesome. Because I was amazing.

"That was awesome!" Nicole said. I knew it. "Gir and Bob, that was good acting. You should be in Irken's Got Talent or something."

"Irken's Got Talent?" Danicka said. "How many Irken spinoffs of the American shows are there?"

"That was one of the best performances I've seen," Nicole said.

"Yep," Danicka agreed. "Really good." That's all she had to say? She's probably speechless or something.

And then Voldemort comes up with something bad to say. He's a little evil, I guess. "I hated three things about it. 1: Your choreography was stupid, 2: your costumes are mediocre, and 3: it makes me wish for a third thing."

"Well I give them a 10," Nicole said.

"10," Danicka said.

"8," Voldemort says. Fuck you, Voldemort.

"Okay so their average is..." Oswald said, "is 9.33, which means they make it into the next round. Yay..."

"Cool, I didn't know we did averages," Danicka said, "What's that?"

We go backstage.

"Yay we made it into the next round," Dib said. He stared straight into Jessie's eyes.

"Dib," I said. "She hates you."

"Oh thanks." Dib's sadness made me feel sad. Why was he sad? Probably because of Jessie. She wasn't special anyway. But how did she make him feel special? I wish I knew. I can't stand to watch Dib sad like that. It's depressing and sometimes I think that I--

OMG OMG OMG OMG OMG OMG OMG OMG OMG OMG OMG OMG OMG OMG OMG OMG

Now you'll never know what Zim was thinking in his mind. No more Zim's POV. Now, it's just gonna be third person.

LOLZ LOLZ LOLZ LOLZ LOLZ LOLZ LOLZ LOLZ LOLZ LOLZ LOLZ LOLZ LOLZ LOLZ LOLZ

Jessie stared back at Dib. She really misses him. But she can't go out with someone that's just gonna cheat on her. He's just so sexy. She just can't believe that he had to break her heart. What's wrong with guys? They think they can just do this to her. Girls are fragile. Except her. She's strong, and she can go through anything that happens.

"Sam?" Jessie says.

"Yes?" Sam says.

"What do you think of Dib?"

"Sexy."

"Yeah, he is, isn't he?"

"But don't you ever get the feeling that Zim's hitting on Dib?"

"What are you talking about?"

"What? You don't feel the sexy Irken love?"

"...No."

"Oh well, we're up next. Get ready."

Was Zim gay? No, he can't be. That would go against everything Jessie believed in! She was going to apologize to Dib, but she finds it hard to do so. She just wants to forget about the past and hope they'll at least stay as friends. She can't be mad at him forever.

"Next are Peter Griffin and Sam, and Jesse and Jessie McCartney!" Oswald said.

"I'm kinda nervous!" Sam said.

"Really?" Jessie asked.

"No!"

"Me neither. I'm used to this kind of stuff."

"You know for a pop star, I never heard of you."

"That's a nice thing to say."

When they got on stage, they went in their positions. The song started playing, and they danced to it.

XXX

Music Starts Playing: YMCA by Village People

**Peter Griffin.** Young man, there's no need to feel down.  
I said, young man, pick yourself off the ground.  
I said, young man, 'cause you're in a new town  
There's no need to be unhappy.

**Jesse. **Young man, there's a place you can go.  
I said, young man, when you're short on your dough.  
You can stay there, and I'm sure you will find  
Many ways to have a good time.

**All. **It's fun to stay at the y-m-c-a.  
It's fun to stay at the y-m-c-a.

**Peter Griffin. **They have everything for you men to enjoy,  
You can hang out with all the boys ...

**All. **It's fun to stay at the y-m-c-a.  
It's fun to stay at the y-m-c-a.

**Jesse. **You can get yourself cleaned, you can have a good meal,  
You can do whatever you feel ...

**Sam. **Young man, are you listening to me?  
I said, young man, what do you want to be?  
I said, young man, you can make real your dreams.  
But you got to know this one thing!

**Jessie. **No man does it all by himself.  
I said, young man, put your pride on the shelf,  
And just go there, to the YMCA  
I'm sure they can help you today.

**All. **It's fun to stay at the y-m-c-a.  
It's fun to stay at the y-m-c-a.

**Sam. **They have everything for you men to enjoy,  
You can hang out with all the boys ...

**All. **It's fun to stay at the y-m-c-a.  
It's fun to stay at the y-m-c-a.

**Jessie. **You can get yourself cleaned, you can have a good meal,  
You can do whatever you feel ...

**Jesse. **Young man, I was once in your shoes.  
I said, I was down and out with the blues.  
I felt no man cared if I were alive.  
I felt the whole world was so tight ...

**Peter Griffin. **That's when someone came up to me,  
And said, young man, take a walk up the street.  
There's a place there called the y.m.c.a.  
They can start you back on your way.

**All. **It's fun to stay at the y-m-c-a.  
It's fun to stay at the y-m-c-a.

**Jessie. **They have everything for you men to enjoy,  
You can hang out with all the boys ...

**All. **Y-m-c-a ... It's fun to stay at the y-m-c-a.

**Sam. **Young man, young man, there's no need to feel down.  
Young man, young man, get yourself off the ground.

**All. **Y-m-c-a ... and just go to the y-m-c-a.

**Jessie. **Young man, young man, there's no need to feel down.  
Young man, young man, get yourself off the ground.

-Then the song fades away like most 70's music do.

MUSIC ENDS.

XXX

"That's Jesse and Jessie McCartney, and Peter Griffin and Sam singing YMCA by Village People!" Oswald said. Thanks for the obvious.

People cheered.

"I like that song! It's my favorite really old song!" Nicole said. "9."

"I like dancing to it!" Danicka said. "You danced good! 9."

"Just horrible," Voldemort said. What a hoe. "7."

"So the average is 8.33," Oswald said. "They barely made it to the next round! But they still made it! YAY!"

The contestants walked backstage.

"Yay! I thought we were pretty good!" Sam said.

"Yep!" Jessie said. Her mind was still on Dib. How should she tell Dib how she felt about being just friends? Maybe she shouldn't talk to him at all. No, that won't solve anything.

Sam was pretty bored now because all Jessie could think about was Dib, so Jessie wouldn't talk to her. "Jessie! JESSIE!"

"What?!"

"You keep spacing out! Dib's all you ever think about! He might not even think about you either!" But Sam was wrong. Dib thought about Jessie everyday. At night, he would hug his pillow and think it's Jessie. Some people would find that sweet, but I (as the author) find that just plain creepy. He imagines her right next to him everyday like she's his imaginary friend. He's got a voodoo doll of her made from her hair and uses it in a way that I'd rather not explain.

As for Jessie, well... all she does is stare at him. Whenever Dib looks at Jessie straight in the eyes, she looks away, breaking the heart pounding eye contact. Well, at least she doesn't masturbate with a voodoo doll made of Dib's hair. She's normal and Dib is... well, a freak. But I guess they're perfect for each other.

Meanwhile, Amethyst and Tak were talking.

"Did you hear that Michael Jackson died?" Amethyst said.

"Yes... but why should I care about some human's death?" Tak said.

"I keep hearing that so I told you."

"We have to kill off Dib."

"Why?! Isn't our plan working?"

"But people like Dib can always solve their problems. You ever watch Degrassi?" Tak said. It's so boring in Planet Wollywood so Tak watches TV now. She learned that a talking sponge is very annoying, a house can actually be lifted with at least a billion balloons, and that high school teenagers are wasted hoes that go through so much drama but learn to deal with it and solve it eventually. That show was Degrassi.

"What's that?" Amethyst asked.

"It's just a show, and it helps me observe the weaknesses of the vile humans."

"Well what are they?"

"One of them is love. It can make a human very happy but it can also kill them off. But Dib won't go suicidal, so that's why we have to kill him first."

"How?"

"We can pay someone to kill him. I got connections..." Tak said. Just the other day, she met up with Stewie and Brian, and paid them off with 3 million munnies (which is $20 in USA currency) to kill Dib. Stewie had no problem doing so.

"When are we gonna go meet your 'connections?'" Amethyst asked.

"Don't worry. I already told them to kill him later on this week..." Tak answered.

"Who is it?"

"I can't tell you."

"And why not?!" Amethyst feels insulted. They've been working together all this time and now Tak won't even let her in on the plan.

"Because when the plan goes wrong, there's one person less who knows what really happened to Dib. They're gonna do research and they have high-tech lie detectors. But I'm gonna escape this planet before anyone's gonna start investigation," Tak said.

"Whatever. We're up."

"Really? I didn't hear Oswald say anything."

"Kierra and Amethyst, Tak and Mimi? Where are you?" They heard Oswald say.

They go on stage. As soon as the song starts, they hear the sound of the flute playing.

XXX  
Music Starts Playing: Never Underestimate a Girl by Vanessa Hudgens

**Kierra. **It takes a girl to understand  
Just how to win  
She knows...She can  
I think it's clear  
Who wears the pants  
What boy...could stand...a chance

**Tak. **She makes it look easy  
In control completely  
She'll get the best of you...every single...time  
Thought by now you'd realize you should

**All. **Never underestimate a girl  
Gets anything she wants  
She's never gonna stop  
(**Amethyst. **You know it...we know it)  
Never underestimate a girl  
She's always got a plan  
The world is in her hands

**Mimi. **She got the lipstick  
Puts it together  
Boys have it good  
But girls have it better...(**Kierra. **watch out)  
Your secretary might  
End up your boss  
Whether you...really like it...or not

**Amethyst. **She makes it look easy  
In control completely  
She'll get the best of you... every single...time  
That's right...no no no you should

**All. **Never underestimate a girl  
Gets anything she wants  
She's never gonna stop  
(**Tak. **You know it...we know it)  
Never underestimate a girl  
She's always got a plan  
The world is in her hands

**Tak. **She might be the president  
Make all the rules  
Don't try to win the game  
You're only gonna lose  
Now girls you know we got it  
Got it going on  
We've been trying to tell them all along  
Listen up guys  
Take a little sound advice

da da da da....

**All. **Never underestimate a girl  
Gets anything she wants  
She's never gonna stop  
(**Amethyst. **You know it...we know it)  
Never underestimate a girl  
She's always got a plan  
The world is in her hands

Music ENDS.  
XXX

"That's right. NEVER underestimate a girl. That song's in my head now," Nicole says. "8."

"Yeah...!" Danicks says. "10."

"I hate Vanessa Hudgens," Voldemort says. "7."

"That's 8.33 points!" Oswald says. "They barely made it, too. But they made it in anyway. Yay!"

They went backstage.

"Wow, they're getting really lazy on the judging," Amethyst says.

"I know," Tak says. She sees Jessie just sitting there. "Hey, Jessie. Buddy. Pal." Her eye twitches.

"Hey," Jessie says.

"What's up?"

"I'm bored. Ever since Dib and I broke up, I got nothing to do. Being single is so boring."

"Well, did you notice how Zim looks like he loves Dib?" Amethyst asked.

"No, but Sam told me that too. Is it that obvious?" Jessie asks.

"Yeah, Zim is so totally flirting with Dib," Sam said. Where did she come from?

"That's... so weird," Jessie said. "Is Dib doing anything about it ?"

"Well, YEAH! Dib's not doing anything about it, but he's just playing hard to get," Sam said.

"Seriously?" Jessie asked. This really creeps her out.

"Yeah, and you know what else Zim does?" Amethyst said. She's really gonna make things up about Zim now.

"What?" Jessie knows she shouldn't be talking about this, but she just loves talking about guys, but she'd never expect to be talking about gays.

Meanwhile, Oswald was announcing the next pair to go up on stage. "Next are Brian and Stewie, and George Clooney and Skoodge!"

People started clapping when Skoodge and George Clooney went on stage. They started their performance.

"THE SIDE-BOOB HOUR?!" George Clooney screamed at Skoodge. "Skoodge, that's it. I asked you to stop this and you won't listen to me. I'm sorry, but you left me no other choice. I called the FCC!"

"Oh yeah, I know all about the FCC," Skoodge said. Stewie and Brian come out from backstage.

XXX  
Music Starts Playing: The Freaking FCC from Family Guy

**Skoodge:** They will clean up all your talking in a menace such as this  
**Brian:** They will make you take a tinkle when you want to take a piss  
**Stewie:** And they'll make you call fellatio a trouser-friendly kiss  
**Skoodge, Brian, & Stewie:** It's the plain situation!  
There's no negotiation!  
**Skoodge:** With the fellows at the freakin FCC!

**Brian: **They're as stuffy as the stuffiest of the special interest groups...  
**Skoodge:** Make a joke about your bowels and they order in the troops  
**Stewie: **Any baby with a brain could tell them everybody poops!  
**Skoodge, Brian, & Stewie:** Take a tip, take a lesson!  
You'll never win by messin'  
**Skoodge: **With the fellas at the freakin' FCC  
And if you find yourself with some young sexy thing  
You're gonna have to do her with your ding-a-ling  
Cause you can't say penis!

So they sent this little warning they're prepared to do the worst  
**Brian:** And they stuck it in your mailbox hoping you could be co-erced  
**Stewie:** I can think of quite another place they should have stuck it first!

**Skoodge, Brian, & Stewie:** They may just be neurotic  
Or possible psychotic  
They're the fellas at the freakin FCC!

Music ENDS.

XXX

"YES! That song is hilarious," Nicole said. "But too bad. George Clooney didn't sing in it at all. The beginning doesn't count, because he wasn't singing. Points get deducted for that. But good singing though. 9."

"9," said Danicka.

"7," said Voldemort.

"That's 8.33 average. They barely made it, too. Now this is the end of this round!" said Oswald.

Everyone cheers.

"But remember, the whole universe, it's not the judges' votes that count. It's yours. They're fate of staying until the last round, which is next round, depends on your opinion! So call to vote now! 1-800-(whatever their name is). Or text who you're voting for to 123-456-7890. That's 123-456-7890. This time, there will only be the Bottom One, since we need a few more people for the last round."

That was the end of Irken Idol. Back at the Kajolica Hotel...

"I can't believe Dib's gay," Jessie told Tak.

"Weird... Now go spread that to everyone so the whole universe can know what you just said so they all think Dib would be weird and vote him out for the last round," Tak said.

"Okay!" Jessie said. She went up to a random hobo. "Hi, hobo!"

"...Your mom!" the hobo said. He ran away.

"Someone's rude..." She looked for someone else. "MOM?!" She saw her mom walking away, like she's completely ignoring her. "MOM!" She screamed as she tried to catch up to her. As soon as she did, she found out she was Dib. "Oh, you're not my mom..."

"Do I look like your mom?" Dib asked.

Jessie took a long look at him. "No, not really. I'm sorry. It's just that my mom isn't here and I really miss her."

"Oh, where is she?"

Jessie points up. Dib says, "Oh.. she's up in--"

"Space," Jessie said. "She's a universal astronaut. She travels from planet to planet."

"Why doesn't she travel somewhere near the Milky Way galaxy?"

"Because she was raised by aliens, so she speaks Ferkulese. She was raised on Planet Ferkulon, by an alien race called 'The Jewish.'" (NO RACISM INTENDED!!)

"So if your mom was raised by The Jewish, then how were you born?"

"They sent my mom back to Earth so she could live a normal human life for like 20 years. They gave her a language translator so she knows every language known to man and aliens. Then she met my dad at Taco Bell and I was born!"

"Do you know what race you are, then?"

"I think I'm white, mostly because my skin is white. But my mom doesn't remember, since she was taken by The Jewish when she was like a baby."

"Why did they take her?"

"She had something special about her, but not even my mom knew what it was. I haven't seen her since I was 3 years old, so it's been 7 years since her last trip to Planet Irk. She's traveling around the universe to learn. She's like a biologist in space. But she never came back after that. She was supposed to be back by last year."

"I'm sorry."

"Yeah, well I wish my mom was back." Jessie felt different about Dib again. She forgot how Dib was always a good listener to her. Usually when she wanted someone to talk to, they'd think she was boring. But Dib was all right. "You know there are rumors about Zim being gay."

"What?!"

"So I'm gonna ask you. Do you like Zim?"

"HEEEELLLLLLLLL NO!"

"A straight-up no would've been fine. Other rumors been going around that you were playing 'hard to get.'"

"NO! I don't like Zim! I like" -- Dib paused for a second -- "food. I like food."

"Who doesn't?! Anyway I'll leave now. Bye!" Jessie left.

Dib was about to say he liked Jessie but he wasn't sure if Jessie felt the same way. He didn't wanna look like a dork to her. Aww.

"HEY!" Jessie called someone. "YOU!"

"ME?!" said the someone.

"YES YOU!" Jessie said. "I need you to help me spread this around. Can you text really fast?!"

"YES!" said the someone. He pulled out his phone and got ready to text.

"Okay, you know me right? I'm from Irken Idol!"

"I know!"

"So, being part of Irken Idol, I would know this. Someone in Irken Idol is GAY!"

"WHO?!" The someone typed all of this while he was talking to her.

"D--" she stopped for a second "--Stewie!"

"Stewie's gay?!"

"Yes!" She didn't say Dib, because she obviously knew he liked her so she knew he wasn't gay. But she didn't realize that until now, so she panicked and said Stewie was gay. "He loves DIB!"

STUPID MISTAKE! She forgot that she was supposed to say Zim was gay but instead she thought she had to say Dib was gay, which made her say Stewie was gay. She should've at least said that Stewie loved Zim instead of Dib. But it was too late now. The someone already sent the message to everyone.

"The message is sent!" said the someone.

"Okay then... Bye!" Jessie ran away to tell someone else.

"Haha," said the someone, "Ironically, I happened to be a paparazzi under disguise! I can see it in the papers now! 'Stewie GAY! In Love with Gargantuan Head' Now I'm gonna go to the Daily Planet and tell people to publish this story!"

How will this affect the contestants? What will Stewie do?  
Will Jessie ever reunite with her mother? What happened to her?  
**  
Find out in the next chapter!**

Fact: The original idea I had planned for this chapter was so different. I was gonna make Dib's Coolinator work, get Billy Mays in the story (RIP Billy Mays; Oxiclean forever!), and a lot of other things.

FUN Fact: Deodorant can help get rid of bug bites. =]  
It's true! I did it today and it finally stopped itching!

* * *

**I do not own Michael Jackson, Google, the song Thriller, the Go Duster, the Jonas Brothers, John Tartaglia, Voldemort, Simon, American Idol, the song YMCA, original Invader Zim characters, the name Peter Griffin, Tak, Degrassi, Stewie and Brian, the song ****Never Underestimate a Girl by Vanessa Hudgens, the names Brian and Stewie and George Clooney, the song The Freaking FCC from Family Guy, and Oxiclean.**

Click this awesome rectangle below and type something sexy about this story, my lovers!


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